Chapter 9: Jenny Moves In

Jenny felt strange, parking in front of Dana and Ed's house. 'Dana's been a great friend, I like Ed a lot, he's sexy and funny, ' she thought. Then, her depression returned. Not wanting to deal with it alone, she walked to the door and rang.

As usual, Dana came to the door. She was dressed in a long, dark gray jersey shift that followed the outline of her body, clung to her breasts, tummy and thighs like wallpaper. There was a glass in her hand. She let Jenny in and put an arm around her waist, hugging her close. Jenny hugged her back, rubbing her hand across Dana's buttocks. Dana chuckled, pulled back and gave Jenny the glass.

"Try some of this, Jenny. You feel good, look good. Keep up those hugs and we'll never eat."

"Thanks for asking me over, you look so great." Jenny undid the buttons on her blouse until the rise of her breasts was visible. "Mind if I do this?" Dana shook her head. "How come you're cooking on a work night?"

"I usually do — cook, that is. I like to cook and I do easy stuff during the week. Sometimes Ed cooks, too. Just stew tonight... it's ready, but come sit for a while." She led the way into the living room. Ed got up, came to them. He took both Jenny's hands, gave her a strong, friendly hug and let her go.

"Glad you're here," he said.

Jenny sat down next to Dana, and the three of them chatted their way through the glass of wine. When the bottom of the glass was in sight, Dana directed them to the table. Dinner was stew, a delicious, spicy treat of lamb and feta cheese.

After everyone had stuffed the first mouthfuls down, Dana said, "Jenny, I really wanted to let us eat and relax a bit, but I have this feeling, that if we don't get started on this, we'll be here all night. Do you mind talking serious and eating at the same time? What were you crying about last night?"

"No, I don't mind, not really," Jenny said. "I guess I really don't want to talk about it at all, you know? But you're right, I was crying and I'm kind of in a mess, and — bless you — you always pick up on those things."

"Well, whatever. What's the trouble?"

Jenny considered, decided. "Sid's left. I'm rattling around in that place like a pea in a box. I'm lonely." She looked at both of them and smiled. "And I'm horny. That's my problem. Really all of it."

"When we talked last," Dana said, "you told me you were a little worried about it. I told Ed everything you told me, you know."

"Of course. I just assumed you'd tell him. No problem. I guess I ought to tell you more about it.

"I told you that Sid wasn't too happy with the way I was changing," Jenny grinned. "Since I got my mantra, you know. I think, looking back, he was really like those guys who took advantage of me — the whole Dominance and Submission thing — only not so obvious. He liked to tell me what I should do, and have me agree and do it. The more I got into the habit of making my own mind up, the less he liked it.

"I don't really know what it was that tipped the scales, but about a week ago, I came home and he wasn't there, he'd cleared out. Clothes gone — all that. Moved out. He left a note, said conventional things — how great it had been, sorry he had to leave — all that, and none of it meant anything. I've cried a lot, but really... Dana, Ed... I'm glad he's gone. It hasn't been good for a long time, and that's mostly my fault." She raised her hand as Dana started to object. "No, that's true... because I changed and he didn't. I guess he couldn't... that's what it came down to, and I don't blame him any more than I blame myself for trying to become a whole person.

"But the end of it all, Dana, is that I went to Wednesday last night and I saw all the rest of the guys — we're mostly all couples — together and it really hit me, how alone I am. How alone I feel. The place is too big; I've got to find a smaller place, move, all those awful things. That's why you found me in the Ladies, washing my eyes to pretend I wasn't ready to cry my heart out — again." She reached across the table to touch Dana's hand. "Thank you for picking up on it, for asking me here tonight."

Dana got up and organized the empty plates, Jenny helped. Ed busied himself with after-dinner drinks. When they sat down again, it was in the living room again, Dana and Ed on the sofa, Jenny in an armchair.

Dana's face was thoughtful, she hadn't said much. Finally, she finished her coffee, put the cup on the table and looked at Jenny.

"Jen, I'm sorry about Sid. I know you cared for him and that you tried your best to do two contradictory things — meet his needs and your own. Now, it's over and you're in a three-way bind. You've got a place that's too big and expensive, you're lonely and you're horny." She paused, looked at Jenny. "Have I got that right?"

"Dead on, as always," Jenny said. "I still haven't really accepted that I couldn't have done something to... No, Dana, you've got it right. I just hadn't put it clearly to myself. He needs something I used to give him, but I can't do it anymore. That's why he had to leave. Maybe someday, I'll get a chance to tell him, thank him for what he did do." She put her own cup down. "He gave me the space I needed to be able to get where I am. He deserves at least a hug for that."

"He does. That's right."

Ed spoke up, for almost the first time. "Jenny, I haven't said anything until now, because you two've been settling things I don't know much about. I mean, Dana's told me what's been happening, pretty much blow-by-blow. But that's not something I know first hand. Now you're here and you're saying you've got a problem. We've talked about it. Can I offer a short-term solution?"