Chapter 1

I found it difficult to gather my thoughts as I sat smoking my cigarette in the silence. The reason was, ironically, the fact that the silence was so loud. I heard once that scientists had discovered that, by broadcasting the exact opposite of a sound, you could make it so that no sound was actually heard. That's what this silence was, it was anti-sound, it was the opposite of a million, shouted conversations at once in a tiny prison cell, it was loud. I gave up the impossible task of thinking in that silence, stubbed out my cigarette, and sat back in my chair so that I could survey the room.

The others were all here, except for the two who were representing us in council. Even with Gallagher and Hans gone, I still believe that this was the first time this many of us had been in one room in years, since we had last been in high school, in fact. Now here we all sat, years older... but still nowhere near as old as we felt. I reached, almost without thinking, in to my breast pocket and fished out another cigarette, glad that I did not have to step out into the cold New England winter to allow myself this attempt to relax.

After lighting my smoke, I leaned even farther back in my chair and surveyed the room. I felt the sudden need to know where my friends were, and more importantly, where those less friendly to me were. It wasn't really that I had enemies here, we were all clansmen after all, but under circumstances such as ours, what had began as small personal rivalries and disagreements had begun to be blown out of proportion. For the most part, we were still loyal, in some cases fanatically loyal, to either the clan, it's goals, or each other, at least I was fairly sure MOST of us were, although there was one person here that I was fairly sure wasn't interested in anything but himself. Almost without thought, I began to look for him, but before my eyes could seek him out, my view of the room was cut off as a golden vision softly inserted herself between my eyes and the room.

Nightshade sat down and in the chair across from me. Only inches separated our knees, but to my tortured heart it was as though a mile wide chasm occupied those few inches. Our eyes met and for an instant I saw that she understood this pain, and her eyes were as clear as crystal, allowing me to see the sorrow beneath them. Then she blinked, the crystal clouded, and I saw only the tight penetrating gaze I remembered so well from before.

"Hello Fey." Her voice was as soft as her earlier gaze, but as emotionally dry as her present look.

"Nightshade." I inclined my head slightly, and took care to keep my voice as even and controlled as hers.

"How have you been?"

"I've been as well as can be expected, all things considered." Damn. I hadn't meant to let that slip so quickly, but apparently she understood, for she simply nodded to herself. As she opened her mouth to reply though, a small tornado suddenly rushed across the room and deposited itself in her lap.

"Hi mommy!" Raven, Nightshade's daughter piped, fixing her mother with an impishly whimsical gaze from beneath long curls as black as her name implied.

"Hello dear." Nightshade replied, pulling the young girl the rest of the way up and seating her in a more comfortable spot on her lap. "What have you been doing?"

"Playin' with Geordie." The child responded proudly, holding up the slightly ragged stuffed doll she had in her hands.

"Oh I see." Her mother smiled, and as she looked at her daughter, I saw the same crystal clarity I had seen earlier, but this time the emotion radiated was pride, but was that a touch of wistfulness as well, or was it my imagination? I decided that I'd never be sure, and that it was best not to think about it. She glanced at me, beaming with that warm maternal glow I had only seen once, a few months before Raven's birth, and scant weeks before the last time I had seen Nightshade. "Darling, you remember Fey don't you?" The child looked up at me and her eyes sparkled.

"Of course mommy, Mr. Birdman!" She giggled at this last part and her mother and I shared a chuckle. The name I used here, different from the one I currently used in the real world, was Fey Ren. Ren, in this case is pronounced the same as WREN, a small bird, hence the child's nickname for me. "He's the one that's so nervous about me." The child added, which ended our mirth.

"Why do you say that darling?" Her mom asked sharply.

"Cause it's true mommy, I hear it here." She insisted, pointing at her head.

"Darling, you're not supposed to talk about what you hear, remember? Now apologize to Fey."

"Yes mommy, I'll remember. I'm sorry Mr. Birdman."

"That's alright." I replied automatically.

"Now go play honey." Nightshade set the youngster down and watched her as she scurried off to a private corner. Then she stood, her golden hair waving slightly with her movements. "We'd better go get some more wood for this fire."

Realizing that she really wanted a chance to speak with me alone, out of earshot of the others, and seeing as the others were doing a fair job of ignoring us right now, I knew the discussion had to be extremely private.

"Look." Nightshade said, as soon as we stepped out into the woodshed, "I don't want there to be any tension between us, we've had that for too long. Can't you accept me as a friend and forget about the other?"

"It's been a long time since we were anything, let alone simply friends." I avoided looking at her as I began tossing wood into the bucket.

"Maybe as they measure time, but for us it's barely been a heartbeat."

"Maybe, but my heart got cut pretty deep between those beats."

"And you think mine didn't?!"

"You left. You were going to run away home and never look back, never talk to any of us again." Now she really got upset, and her cornflower blue eyes swam with brimming tears.

"You were doing the same damn thing and don't you forget it!"

"I couldn't stand to see the two of you together anymore. He was my friend, but I wanted to kill him for the way he treated you!"

"You think I didn't? Hell, leaving was the only way I could get away from him. By the time I was settled, you'd left as well and I didn't know how to find you. I couldn't leave a message for you with anyone because he'd have gotten it."

She was right... I didn't like it, but she did have a point. I knew how hard it was to find someone across 3/4ths of the continent, hell I'd been trying to find HER this whole time.

"How do I know you're telling the truth?"

"How do you know I'm not?" Damn I hate it when she makes sense.

"Fair enough." I conceded, then I thought of something, "You know... I've thought about what this conversation would be like a hundred times... but I never thought it would be like this."

"Really? How did you think it would be?"

"I thought that we'd end up together again. But that won't happen now, and, no offense, but I'm glad it won't."

"Fair enough. How is your family by the way?"

"They're doing alright... William doesn't understand why he can't be here, but the others are old enough to understand."

"What have you told them?"

"The kids? Just that I had some very important stuff to do and that I'd try to be back soon."

"And your wife?"

"I've told her everything. I told her the whole story before we got married," I grinned, "she thinks I'm crazy, but she thought that before I told her, she just thinks it's worse now."

Nightshade's lips crinkled in that familiar wry smile.

"I understand how that is, believe me."

"Well, we'd better get back." I lifted the full wood pail and opened the door.

I entered the library and walked directly to the fireplace. Setting the pail on the hearth I squatted down and started feeding the blaze, which had just begun to die in my absence. As the second log landed in the flames and, popping gently, settled into position, I felt it. I always know when someone is behind me, especially when that person is unfriendly. I knew who it had to be, and I knew that he meant me no immediate harm, so I ignored him just long enough to toss a third log on, stand and brush my hands casually on my jeans.

"What do you want Lucius?" I asked wearily as I turned to look him in the eyes.

"What's going on Fey?" His eyes sparkled, and his mouth drew back in that merry grin he usually uses to his advantage, I, however, was having none of it tonight.

"Cut the crap brother." I said, placing all the scorn I had ever felt for him into that last word. "I'm in no mood to pretend with you tonight."

"Alright, if that's how you want it. I thought that we could at least act civil to each other tonight."

"I've spent too many years being civil to you, while at the same time hating everything you stand for."

"Fey, it's been what, more than two thousand years, can't you forget about that one life?"

"Why should I? The rest of the world hasn't. You corrupted the thinking of the entire planet with that simple power play you pulled."

"Simple? You think that life was simple? Living within those rigid constraints, just because a bunch of guys who suffered heat induced delusions managed to convince a bunch of hot, starving, bastards that they knew what was gonna happen and then wrote down their insanities? Hell they had everything accounted for, you have no idea how hard it was to pull off."

"Then why did you bother with it Lucius?"

"For the power, and to misdirect the humans." he shrugged, "Same reason we've all had for the things we've done at one time or another."

"Well, I'm through with that shit, for now and forever." I brushed past him and began to head across the room, but his voice from over my shoulder made me pause.

"If that's true, then why are you here tonight?"

I turned back to him and looked him in the eyes and replied, perfectly clear and level, so there would be no mistaking my meaning... or my honesty. "Because I believe we can finally work to repair the damage our presence has had here. All our petty squabbles are pointless and they've ruined this place, I'd like to see us start helping the humans instead of treating them as pawns and sheep. They are our children, after all." I broke off at that, though there were a hundred more things I could have said, I hadn't intended to make a speech.

He simply snorted softly, dropped his eyes, shook his head gently, and walked off to the shadowy seat in the corner that he had occupied most of the night. I shrugged, turned, and continued my walk back across the width of the room. I begin to browse the books on the cases that lined the walls, starting next to the door and working my way clockwise around the room towards the fireplace, making sure that I would reach it long before I came near Lucius again.

As it turned out, my precautions were unnecessary. No sooner had I started to browse the titles on the first bookcase, than a low gong resonated through the library. It was, of course, the symbol we had been waiting on. Galigher and Hans had returned from the council meeting, now we would see what had been decided, if anything.

Being closest to the door, I opened it, and held it as the others filed past. I looked no one in the eye, though I was not unaware of the quick glances thrown in my direction. I concentrated instead on the flames roaring in the hearth, beautiful, as fire always seemed to me. Sunshine was the last, and I closed the door behind me as I followed her out into the hallway and turned right towards the dining hall. I was somewhat surprised that she had answered the call, seeing as how she had tried her best to deny what she was. I suppose there are some things you can't change about yourself, no matter how much you want to. I had once felt that way, though I had no desire to change the things she did, but I had learned years ago to be happy with who and what I was. No mater how much I might hate some things I had done, and that had been done to me, I knew that they had all worked together to make me who I was, and damn it all, I liked who I was.

I followed the others as we filed into the spacious dining room. Places had already been set in expectation of this conference, and each assigned seat was indicated by the ornate goblets set just to the front right of each small plate. These large silver chalices were custom made, and each displayed a different symbol to signify its owner. One by one the people in front of me stepped forward to make their bows to the current matron of our clan. Gallagher stood behind her chair at the northern point of the circular table. She seemed to be in her element as she acknowledged our obeisances with an elegant nod; only the pale whiteness on her knuckles, from the strength of her grip on the chair back, gave any indication that she was using this ritual to cover some strong emotions. I didn't know what those emotions might be, but I sensed that she was probably displeased with the news she had to deliver. I straightened from my deep bow and stepped to my seat, indicated by my own symbol of a night blue and black yin-yang superimposed by a silver pentacle. At Gallagher's gesture we all took our seats

Quietly, servants immediately brought in two platters piled high with small sandwich wedges which they set in the middle of the table. Another servant carried a tray with several glass bottles upon it. They all appeared to be different vintages and types of wine, but I knew that there would be other substances as well in a few of those bottles. I discovered that I was right as the man brought the tray to me, I studied the labels for a moment then indicated a rich crimson 12-year old vintage. The waiter filled my goblet and Lorne, on my right chose a nice Merlot, I noted that Sunshine on my left had chosen simple grape juice, but was unsurprised. What did surprise me was the fact that they had chosen to seat me next to Sunshine in the first place, as opposed to Rosa who sat between Lorne and Nightshade, who sat at Gallagher's left hand. A glance at the person on Sunshine's left gave me a quick answer. So, they want her to act as a buffer between us, eh? Well, I hope it works.

The servants finished their tasks and departed as silently as they'd entered. After they had left, the butler closed himself outside of the double doors and we were left alone. Gallagher stared down at her goblet for a few moments and then looked up as though only just now aware that every face in the room was fastened on her. Her gaze swept clockwise around the table, making brief eye contact with each of us. It almost seemed as if she were unsure how to deliver her news.

"Well, I want to thank you for all coming on such short notice, I know it's been hard on many of you. Please feel free to try these lovely snacks. I hope you find your beverages to your liking as well."

"Just give us the news Gallagher." This growl came from Lucius, which I expected, the man was constitutionally incapable of small talk when he was impatient. His grasp of civility was as firm as iron when he was relaxed (or trying to sell someone something, which was almost always) but he'd evidently seen the nervousness in Gallagher that I had and was infected by it. It was this nervousness that fueled his impatience, though he'd die before he admitted it. I, however, reached for a sandwich, I had a feeling it was going to be a long night.

"The news Lucius, is that there is no news!" Gallagher responded, finally allowing her emotions to leak out. "The council is constitutionally incapable of making a decision anymore!" Hans placed a hand on her elbow and she quieted. "Forgive me, we've spent all night arguing and my temper is shot."

"Perhaps it would be easier to start from the beginning, m'lady?" I asked with a look that, I hoped, conveyed my concern and sympathy.

She smiled sweetly, "Of course, dear Fey. If only I knew where the beginning was."

At this lapse, Hans finally spoke. "A petition for a motion has been placed before the council. It has been suggested that we need to release the magic."

An awed and hushed silence filled the room, I felt my jaw unhinge and as I closed it, I realized that I was not the only one who had to do so.

Let me take a moment to explain. There are five sources of natural energy; the first four have been harnessed, to some extent, by modern science. The aquatic energy from our dams; the energy of the winds, harnessed by windmills for centuries; nuclear power, drawn from the depths of the earth itself; thermal and solar energies, which we are just now beginning to put to use; and Magic, the energy of the spirit. Every living thing is born with a varying amount of magical energy. There are also ways to increase your store of magic, two of the easiest ways are simply using it, and getting older. Because of the circumstances surrounding our existence, the magical energy we store up does not dissipate with the death of our physical bodies, as we assume it does with normal humans; instead when we reincarnate we retain that energy, and then proceed to build up more.

Several centuries ago we realized that our constant fighting, coupled with our enormous magic reserves, would, if unchecked, destroy everything we were fighting for. Since peace was completely out of the question (our feuds had gone on so long that nothing short of victory could end them) it was decided that we would have to limit the power available to us. For the third time in history, virtually all of the clansmen from all of the clans gathered together. We drew most of the magic out of the world and sealed it away on the Astral plane. We left only enough for life to continue, and to sustain our spirits between incarnations. There would be no more great feats of magic, no more magical creatures roaming the lands, and no more danger of the world being torn apart by our feuds, or so we thought. And now someone was suggesting we bring it all back.