Caution: This Sex Story contains strong sexual content, including Ma/Fa, Consensual, Romantic, Heterosexual, Science Fiction, Humor, Oral Sex, .
Desc: Sex Story: Intro - If you're familiar with any of my other works, you know you can count on hot sex (wear oven mitts!) wrapped in a funny yarn. Hell, you men out there, even the romantic parts (ugh!) have humor in them. Promise! Yeah, it's Sci-Fi, but there are no space battles; just a character-driven story with lovable characters. It's long, so bring your best attention span! And, if you find yourself rooting for that slimy, dumb-as-shit pervert Peeping Tom, Bertram Balliwick, well, shame on you! Enjoy.
October 12th, 2005 - From an internet newsgroup:
A small, black, two-foot long pig, of the Asian Potbellied variety, escaped its back yard confinement by poking on the gate's latch with its snout. Later, eleven big and burly, male cops had surrounded the pig, circle-like, but the little porker outfoxed them.
Using moves that only an O.J. Simpson-type can execute, the pigskin zigged left, faked a right, then zigged back left, slipping between an officer's legs and making his touchdown... uh... getaway. Final score: Cops 0, Pigskin 1.
This elusive pig, nicknamed The Bacon Bandito by the media, has been on the loose for two weeks now. "We'd better catch him soon!" said Officer Morton Moldon. "He seems to be losing weight!" The pig's owner, Mr. Zeke Footache, agreed.
When questioned by the media as to how he had come to own the pig, Mr. Footache said, quote:
"Funny 'bout that, you betcha. Dumb porker just appeared a couple weeks ago. Sorta out of the blue, you might say. I got up to go find my TV remote... always losing the damn thing, dontcha know... and when I went to sit back down, there he was, big as life, sitting in my chair!
"Sorta strange, dontcha think? Well, it being late and all, I didn't know what else to do with him 'cept put him out in the sty with my other porkers. Well, I went to check on him right after the eleven o'clock news and there he was, a-poking' and a-pryin' at the gate's latch!
"By the time I got over to where he was a-pokin' and a-pryin', he had popped the latch, and man, he was gone! Lickety-split gone, you betcha! It took all I could do, I'll tell ya, to keep the other hogs from following right after him, you betcha!"
If only it had ended here, as nothing more than a general interest item on the web...
But it didn't...