Chapter 32

Sean woke up groggily early in the morning to Elizabeth twirling his hair playfully with an idle finger. He gave an exaggerated yawn, sat up and wrapped an arm around her shoulders and in the process managed to get her teasing finger out of his gigantic cowlick. They snuggled for several moments in the perfect silence of the morning, which was broken only by the occasional twittering of a solitary bird. Sean savored the sensation of her naked body curled up against him as a connoisseur would savor wine.

Elizabeth broke the perfect moment and gave him a quick peck on the cheek before getting out of bed to perform her morning ablutions. Sean cried out as the cold morning air rushed in to fill Elizabeth's void beside him. He closed his eyes and counted to ten before slipping out of bed himself. He played around with her hair and tickled her as she brushed her teeth. She specked the mirror with paste, turned and gave him a sharp swat on his behind for his molestation as he ran to start the shower.

Sean was forced into the cold spray from behind and shouted in surprise as Elizabeth giggled and taunted him. She eventually joined him once the water heated up to her liking and they had a delightful time washing one another. The two spent a wonderfully idyllic morning together sharing breakfast and chatting before sadly separating when Elizabeth had to rush off to work. Conversely Sean had a free schedule. The day before was the last day of physical therapy and he had a small bottle of painkillers handy in case his hip hurt him too much. Tomorrow he would get back to work and see if it were possible to complete his classes for the quarter. But today was all his.

He wondered momentarily what he should do. He decided on something that he hadn't done in the longest time since he met Elizabeth. Sean walked into the weapons room and looked at the walls.

Elizabeth slipped into the apartment quietly. Work was relatively quiet and she found it difficult to distance herself from what had been frightfully occupying her mind. She dropped her purse on the dining table and padded into the bedroom. Sean was asleep. She smiled sadly at his peaceful slumber. He was such a wonderful man. Elizabeth wondered what she had done to deserve him. Then she considered the things of everything that she had done to deserve him. She sat on the edge of the bed and stroked his soft hair. Sean roused at her gentle touch and looked up at her.

"Hey there, Beautiful."

"Hey there yourself, Handsome, " she answered and forced a smile. "How was your day?"

"Oh, nothing special. Just lazed about a bit and decided to take a short nap. By the way, what time is it?"

"A little after five."

Sean grunted and sat up. "Well, we still have plenty of left-overs from last night. How about we warm them in the oven and call it dinner."

"Sounds fine, " she replied. Elizabeth gave him a quick peck on the cheek and got up. "I'm going to hit the shower."

"Mind if I join you?"

"Hmm. Yes, I do mind, you better get started on dinner. I'm famished."

Sean sighed and rolled out of bed. "Yes, dear."

Elizabeth stripped quickly and stepped into the therapeutic spray. Water cascaded over her naked body as she washed and worked out some of the tight muscles in her back that had added to her grumpiness. When she got out she gave herself an appraising look in the mirror. She had lost some weight after the past month's catastrophe. Her skin was slightly paler than she last recalled and she seemed a little bonier too. The circles that had been there for a month, hung beneath her eyes had lightened but were still apparent. Perhaps with a bit more rest they would go away, perhaps. Her thoughts gnawed at her.

Elizabeth bundled her hair atop her head in the magical fashion women innately know how to do and slipped on some comfortable gym shorts and t-shirt. She found Sean in his favorite apron sporting a 'Kiss the Cook' sign emblazoned across it as he read the label on a bottle of white. She decided to heed the advice and gave him a quick peck on the cheek.

They chatted quietly and made small talk for most of the meal until Sean finally put his fork down with a certain finality.

"So, what's really on your mind?"

Elizabeth was brought up short by his sudden query and had to fumble for a response. Sean gazed at her inquiringly and waited patiently for her response. She bit her trembling lower lip nervously as she swatted at the fear that had been worrying at her all this time since her vigil began by his hospital bedside. "Sean, do you still love me?"

She watched as startlement stretched across Sean's face and he immediately strained out of his seat, limped around the corner of the table, and sat next to her.

"What kind of question is that? Of course I love you."

Elizabeth shivered at his words like an autumn tree grasping on to its last leaves in the wind. "It's just that..." Elizabeth stumbled over her emotions and unconsciously rubbed the polish off the silver fork in her hand. "I mean, ever since we met you've been threatened and have gotten into all sorts of trouble. Charles has attacked you and has harassed us several times, you've lost some of your friends, Cheryl is now entirely out of your life, Charles again tried killing you with his car, and then he tried one more time at the hospital. Sean, I think it would be better for you if we stopped seeing each other."

She couldn't bring herself to look in his face for a trace of agreement or any other response from him that would validate her theory. Instead she continued to try to squeeze the silverware in her hand to jelly as she stared resolutely forward at the half-eaten plate of food before her. The infinite silence that stretched between them scraped against her spine as she endured the frightful strain of waiting.

"You know, you are probably right." Elizabeth's head snapped up in horror at his words. "But that doesn't mean that's what I'll do." She studied Sean's every detail as he sat back, his focus lost in some half-forgotten memory. "While I was in my coma, or perhaps immediately afterwards, a lot had changed in me. Like you said, we've been threatened with our lives and I was nearly killed when Charles ran me over. But then all I have to do is take a look at you or even just remember your smile and it's all okay." "I shudder when I consider how I was committing emotional suicide by locking myself up in my own little world until you rescued me. A lot of my time was spent sulking over the past, but you changed all of that. You now make me look forward to a future that I had never addressed." Sean pulled Elizabeth in close and held on to her firmly. "Do you know what that means? I have a life now. I was as good as dead before with nothing to live for. But now I have a purpose and it is all thanks to you. So, there were a few scares and there have been a few sacrifices that I have had to make. It's no less than those you've made. And do you know what else? There are likely to be more obstacles that will pop up as we proceed, but they won't matter as long as we stay together. Okay, so I've nearly been mugged by Charles' goons and yes I've been run over..."

"We've shared a lot of wonderful times together too, or have you forgotten our first kiss or our first fight, which by the way happened in the same night. I won't forget the first time we made up after our fight, the making up was and is the fun part. What about the wonderful time we spent in Lake Tahoe or Thanksgiving with your family? You can't forget how well you nailed me with the water balloon. It's times like those that make all of it worthwhile. I would go through it all over again, the good and the bad, just to know that you love me. I'm better off living dangerously having a life to lose than living securely leading a life not worth losing."

Elizabeth was pacified by Sean's sincere words and finally allowed herself to collapse in his comforting embrace. "I did get you good with that water balloon, didn't I?"

Elizabeth felt Sean's chuckle and couldn't help smiling herself. It still caused a strain on her long wearied features but it was a welcome feeling nonetheless. She pulled Sean closer and returned his firm grasp and slowly let some of the worry drain out. Still, a part of her worried that his life would be less threatened without her in it and she said as much.