Home « Forum « Author Hangout

Forum: Author Hangout

How about this opening?

Bondi Beach

I know, it's too much fun to talk about the election, the meaning of life and The Future of Our Country (USA, that is), but how about a little detour or return to writing about sex?

From the opening paragraphs of First Grave on the Right, by Darynda Jones:

"I was having a killer dream that featured a set of capable hands, a hot mouth, and a creative employment of lederhosen ..."

I'm having fun thinking about creative uses of lederhosen. Not my first choice of clothing with erotic potential, but I'm willing to learn.

bb

Replies:   Dominions Son  Wheezer  Lugh
Dominions Son

@Bondi Beach

know, it's too much fun to talk about the election, the meaning of life and The Future of Our Country (USA, that is), but how about a little detour or return to writing about sex?

From the opening paragraphs of First Grave on the Right, by Darynda Jones:

"I was having a killer dream that featured a set of capable hands, a hot mouth, and a creative employment of lederhosen ..."


Well, lederhosen literally means leather breeches and there are plenty of people with a leather fetish.

They normally come with leather suspenders that could be used as bindings for bondage games.

Wheezer

@Bondi Beach

I could tell you, but it wouldn't do you any good unless you...oh, never mind.

Replies:   Bondi Beach
Bondi Beach
Updated:

@Wheezer


I could tell you, but it wouldn't do you any good unless you...oh, never mind.


See, as you and Dominions Son suggest, there are plenty of possibilities here—which is exactly why the author left it the way she did. As we know, sometimes a prompt is best left as a prompt. Let the reader take it away ...

Just like last year's NaNoWriMo, where one of their pep talks pointed out you'll have a chance later in the story to put that taxidermied marmot you introduced in an early scene to use.

EDIT: Much more interesting than that tired old trope of the gun on the mantel in Scene I.

bb

Replies:   awnlee jawking
awnlee jawking

@Bondi Beach

See, as you and Dominions Son suggest, there are plenty of possibilities here—which is exactly why the author left it the way she did.


I disagree. That's a standard ploy by an author, citing a set of items so absurd they think that nobody could possibly come up with a scenario. In my opinion it shows that SOL authors are more imaginative.

AJ

Replies:   Bondi Beach
Bondi Beach
Updated:

@awnlee jawking


I disagree. That's a standard ploy by an author, citing a set of items so absurd they think that nobody could possibly come up with a scenario. In my opinion it shows that SOL authors are more imaginative.


Hands and mouth—that's easy. Lederhosen? As DS pointed out, lots of people have a leather fetish, and the strings help with a bondage fetish. The author would have to do better if she really wanted outlandish.

EDIT TO ADD: She was also going for funny, which never hurts.

I used the NaNoWriMo taxidermied marmot in Goddess. Hebe beaned Harry with it. Credit my wife for that idea.

The point also was another standard (and successful) ploy: let the curtain come down before you get to the action.

bb

Replies:   Crumbly Writer
Lugh

@Bondi Beach

I'm having fun thinking about creative uses of lederhosen.


True story: from time to time, I've been a dungeonmaster/safety monitor in some large dungeon parties in the Washington DC area. That's often healthier than politics.

Anyway, the Black Rose organization has a lot of experience in running safe dungeons, with areas for specific kinks that may have specific safety needs. New needs always are being learned, as the shift turnover report that included "the fire was put out quickly." Turns out that it's a really bad idea to use some electrical toys (violet wand) that can throw sparks, near where someone in the medical kink area spills a bottle of alcohol.

Where was I? Oh, yeah. Attire kinks. One area was for the mummification devotees. Obviously, a safety concern is that they can breathe. The usual mummification wrap also has an opening for male parts. I remember going into this area, and seeing tables with 8 or so mummies that had erect staffs waving. My initial urge was to find flags to attach to them, but I controlled the urge.

sejintenej

Lederhosen? Ah, we are discussing Germany which has taken the porn crown from Sweden etc, is full of young nicely shaped frauleins with long blond hair to wind round (take your p ick). Then of course the lederhosen expose everything below the pleasure centre but are only held up by braces easily slipped off the shoulders so they would expose everything. The only questions left are to what extent she used her razor /depiliatory cream and whether the young fraulien would say ja bitte, oui vite or yes hurry.

Replies:   Bondi Beach
Bondi Beach

@sejintenej

The only questions left are to what extent she used her razor /depiliatory cream and whether the young fraulien would say ja bitte, oui vite or yes hurry.


And there you go. It's a cliché almost as stale as "show don't tell," but sometimes less is more and this is one of them. She left it for you and every other reader to sail away with the scene.

So, in addition to the young lady's response, the only other question would be whether lederson or a leatherneck would make a better scene ...

bb

Crumbly Writer

@Bondi Beach

As DS pointed out, lots of people have a leather fetish, and the strings help with a bondage fetish. The author would have to do better if she really wanted outlandish.

Lederhosen really uses the wrong type of leather for a serious leather fetish. Instead, they'd likely have a think (similar to the BBM fetish stories) for young German boys.

By the way, from memory, I recall lederhosen as having a rough suede finish, with a stiff, thick, long-lasting (and hard to bend) leather, making them difficult to accomplish much in. As such, they're used more for historical ceremonies than common everyday uses.

Replies:   Bondi Beach
Ernest Bywater

This thread, at this point, reminds me of the old Playboy cartoon of the busty blond lying in bed while on the phone saying, "Yes, dear. I took you advice and got a German Shepherd." Sitting on the end of the bed is a large blond young man in typical lederhosen and holding a shepherd's crook.

Bondi Beach
Updated:

@Crumbly Writer


By the way, from memory, I recall lederhosen as having a rough suede finish, with a stiff, thick, long-lasting (and hard to bend) leather, making them difficult to accomplish much in. As such, they're used more for historical ceremonies than common everyday uses.


You mean historical sex ceremonies as opposed to common everyday sex?

Man, this is a tough crowd. Where's your imagination? Why not take her invitation and run with it? Or, as AJ said, take it as a ridiculous joke and move on. For that matter, take it as a joke that falls flat. I laughed out loud when I heard it, but then I'm easily amused. My wife thought it was kind of funny, too.

After all, couldn't you do a lot in a bedroom with a German shepherd dog wearing lederhosen? EDIT TO ADD: Or, to maintain the honor of the USMC, a Leatherneck?

bb

Replies:   Crumbly Writer
Crumbly Writer

@Bondi Beach

Man, this is a tough crowd. Where's your imagination? Why not take her invitation and run with it? Or, as AJ said, take it as a ridiculous joke and move on. For that matter, take it as a joke that falls flat. I laughed out loud when I heard it, but then I'm easily amused. My wife thought it was kind of funny, too.

I agree, I found it humorous too. However, I was responding to others suggesting it was related to a leather fetish, which I found unlikely (wrong kind of leather). Instead, it's more likely a racial preference (i.e. cute blond, blue-eyed innocence).

Back to Top