Well after more than a little work on this chapter I think I have it. It started out with about 20 pages and was expanded to 80, so ya I might have over done the rewrite, let me know if I did.
Again as the author any and all mistakes are mine, I didn't have any help making them, however if you want to help fix them, cut and paste the part here and send me what you think I should have said, grammar not being my strong suit.
I want to thank those still reading, and I will be expanding the story and continuing it past chapter 12, just how many more there will be, well that will depend on how well I hold up. lets hope I don't lose interest. So far that not likely to happen any time soon as the damn story is keeping my up at night wanting to written.