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February 8, 2013
Posted at 9:40 pm

Jealous Anger

I do a bad thing when I read. I invest myself in the characters. That's one of the reasons I prefer longer stories, it's easier to invest in a character when the story is longer because you really get to know them.

I guess what I'm saying is that a part of me begins to identify with one or more of the characters. Reading, even reading erotica, is almost NEVER sexual for me. I don't masturbate to it. I'll admit I get hard but..sometimes the wind can do that to me.

I was reading a story that I probably never should have started. The writing style seems very juvenile and yet innocent even when it's not. Simple sentences. Lots of repetitiveness. Little to no punctuation. It sucked me in and I just couldn't seem to put it down. The author is Gulf Coast Mattie. I read the first story called "It's better than Nothing" and I was thrilled until the very end. It's about a rather innocent young man who has sexual relations with his mom and sister and a bunch of their friends. He's a bit of a milque-toast; very subservient (especially to his sister and then, later, his wife). It was hard to read but I couldn't put it down...until the end.

Now, one of the things the story is about is how his wife allows him to have sex with other girls (blow jobs mostly but sex with a select few). His mother and sister are extremely sexual (most of the women in the story are) and get off on having 2 lovers at a time (or more).

I've started on the second book "Living with Strong Willed Women" and...I'm not going to be able to finish it. It starts with his wife coming to him and wanting to have an affair with a well-hung college professor -- one that his mother and sister have already had. I found myself growing angrier and angrier and I'm not sure why. I mean, she was letting him have his fun so turnabout is fair play, right?

Wrong. She starts the conversation about how she wants to have the affair by saying "Oh, I'm real understanding and let you have all of these other women so you should let me have this one." She makes it abundantly clear that he can say no at any time -- but she practically guilts him into it. That's wrong. Way wrong.

She has complete control over his life (at his insistence) and he feels he HAS to say 'yes' to her because she's let him have sex with other women. That's fucked up. I'm not saying what's good for the goose isn't good for the gander or whatever metaphor you want, but she had a choice whether her husband can continue. He doesn't really have that choice. It's evident that he doesn't want her to do this -- and they're supposed to know him so well -- but they essentially talk him into it.

Don't get me wrong, if the guy is all for it that's one thing. Same with the girl. She was evidently okay with sharing him -- but if he isn't, and you know it, that's not alright.

I found myself angrily writing a story about what I would do if I found myself in a similar situation. Luckily, I stopped after a half page -- I've got enough stories I'm writing right now and I don't need another.

I will say -- this is not something I could EVER put up with. If my wife ever 'has a fling' that's it for me and her. Forever. Knowing my wife, I can honestly say that the opposite is equally true.

Anyway, I just needed to get that out here instead of writing another stupid story about it. :)