I have finished and sent chapter 3 to a couple editors, so hopefully my misuse of comma's will be curtailed. Chapter 3 proved somewhat difficult to write, it is a pretty pivotal point of the early story, and I had difficulty with some tough decisions to make with it. I am hoping to post the new chapter (and unlikely but possibly revised versions of 1 and 2) by the end of the week. To those who have emailed me, please be assured your feedback has driven me to continue the story.
I have also received a few emails regarding the scene transitions in this chapter. Several people have pointed out that they are abrupt and somewhat difficult to follow. I appreciate the comments very much, however that was actually intentional in this chapter. Patrick is suffering from fever dreams. I tried my best to reflect that throughout the chapter. In the event a story requires me to do something similar to this again, I will try to make it a bit clearer through the narrative. Again thank you to everyone who has sent feedback. It is that feedback that is driving me to keep spending my small free time writing. I have a new two month old daughter, and her 8 year old brother to also devote my time to, so I am trying to find a schedule that works for writing and posting. Finding that schedule does seem to evading me somewhat however. It seems to be feast or famine with my writing some days.