O. K. first off thanks for all the comments on my Jimmy story. To those that ranked me low on technical... well cut me a break. I am trying to write a tantalizing stroke story not a profound novel. To those ladies who commented on my story making them damp... THANK YOU... that gave me a twitch in my crotch. :)
There were also several comments on the length of the chapters. Yes I know they are short... too short. I was trying to put out a chapter every morning so I kept the chapters to around 6k. Yesterday I tried to write a longer chapter and wound up with the story taking me off in it's own direction...towards the romantic. I need to pull it back to what it was meant to be... a stroke story.
Finally... my apologize for the extra commas, the overuse of the word AND, and whatever writing mistakes I am making. Maybe next time I will solicit an editor.