Back at school Jeff’s roommate immediately noticed the difference. “You got laid!”

Jeff blushed.

“C’mon, tell me about it. Tell me all about it.”

Jeff shook his head.

“C’mon. You know I’d tell you. I told you when Phyllis sucked my cock that time. Who was she? What was she like? What did she do?”

“She’s just ... beautiful. Nothing’s more beautiful than Jamie.”

“Jamie, huh.”

“Yeah, Jamie.”

“Nothing, huh? That bad?”

“Huh?”

“You said nothing is more beautiful than Jamie. But is nothing beautiful?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“See, nothing is nothing, which isn’t beautiful; if anything it’s ugly. Nothing is like after you’re dead. Or worse than that, if you never were. So if nothing is more beautiful than Jamie, then Jamie must be a total dog.”

Jeff scowled.

“C’mon man, I’m just kidding. I know this Jamie must be super beautiful. How’d you meet her?”

“Mom and I were visiting her sister during break, and my mom forgot her scarf, and Jamie, that’s my aunt’s daughter–”

“Wait a second. So this Jamie is like your mom’s niece? Your cousin?”

“Well, yeah, I guess so, but...”

“So that’s incest, bro. You’re guilty of incest. If you fucked her that is. You did fuck her, right?”

“It’s not incest.”

“Fuck your cousin and it’s incest. Trust me on that.”

“It’s not.”

“How do you figure?”

“I’m adopted.”

“Shit. I didn’t know. Shit. Lucky thing, though, right? If you weren’t adopted then—”

“It wouldn’t matter.”

“No? Why not?”

“Because I love her.”

“Aw, man, that’s sooo sweeeet.”

“And you know what else?” Jeff said, clenching his fists.

“What else?”

“Nothing is stupider than you.”

“Aw, man. I’m sorry. I really am. Maybe I’m just jealous.”

“Not jealous, envious. You as an English major should know that.”

“You’re right. Envious. But please please please tell me about Jamie.”

Jeff took a deep breath. “We went horseback riding the last day. She’s a really good rider. We were on the island, way out near the point, no one around, and we made love on the dunes, and then we went in the water and splashed around a bit, and swam, and then she was just floating there, with the water completely calm, and she was so beautiful, and I thought, no, I knew, that nothing was more beautiful than Jamie.”

“You are so lucky.”

“I am.”

“So then what happened?”

Jeff smiled.