Chapter 10

December 29, 2012

The days after Christmas were marked by quiet passion. When Mom was at work during the day, we spent our time discovering new ways to give each other pleasure. And when Mom was home in the mornings and evenings, we were so satisfied and comfortable with each other that she never suspected our secret. After Mom went to bed, John would slip under the sheets and hold me while we slept.

The morning after Christmas, I told John about the situation with Holly. He was concerned that our secret hadn't lasted more than few days, but I was able to reassure him she wouldn't tell anyone else unless we said she could.

I planned on calling Jules the day after Christmas to tell her about my change in status, but when my thumb hovered over her contact, I couldn't make myself press it. When I imagined telling her about John, everything about it felt wrong. And I didn't understand my own feelings about it enough to share them with John.

Jules certainly had no problem sharing every detail of her encounters with me, but her affairs were always purely physical relationships. She hadn't dated anyone longer than a month that I could remember. After debating it with myself, I decided it would be best to tell her in person, but that also meant risking her finding out some other way. Either way, I felt doomed.

John and I argued about what to do for Steph's party. We both agreed that he'd go to the party with her as planned, but he was willing to share just enough to blunt her attraction toward him. I, on the other hand, didn't want her to know anything, because I was sure she'd tell Jules before I could. Holly wasn't happy to hear we couldn't decide what to tell Steph, which led to a barrage of texts and messages. They were easy to ignore with John around to distract me.

On Saturday, the day of Steph's party, Mom, John, and I spent the morning doing chores around the house. I had a surprisingly large amount of laundry to do. While I sorted and folded the wash, I kept getting whiffs of our telltale musk from the dirty clothes piles, but Mom seemed not to notice. John spent the day helping Mom clean the garage. It'd been a long overdue chore, made easier by his strength and height.

As I pondered John's recent quiet mood, he came through the house heading to our bathroom. "How's it going out there?" I asked.

He was sweating through his shirt, even though the day was a cold one. "Not too bad, actually, your Mom let me take everything down and spread it out, so we can repack the boxes better. She's writing an inventory of what's going in each box right now, and then I'll help her put them back up on the shelves."

"Thanks so much for helping her with that. It would've taken us forever to do by ourselves."

"Thank you for doing my laundry for me," he said, glancing briefly toward the garage door before bending down for a quick kiss. When I grabbed him so he couldn't pull back right away, he whispered, "We're gonna get caught."

"I know, but isn't it exciting?" I asked, causing him to chuckle as he made his way to the bathroom.

I finished folding his underwear and stacked it with his folded clothes pile right next to mine. It still continued to amaze me how something as small and domestic as folding his laundry could make me feel so good. Every day I'd found more and more things that made me appreciate being with him.

When he came back through the living room heading toward the garage I asked, "Getting hungry?"

"Yes! That cereal didn't last long lifting boxes."

"Tell Mom I'm going to start lunch in a minute."

When I'd finished folding the last of the clothes, I got up to make our lunch. We had tomato soup that would taste good on a cold day, so I emptied two cans in a pot with some milk then put it on the stove to warm. I went through the fridge and pulled out the leftover meatloaf, and began slicing it when Mom came into the kitchen. "I'm making meatloaf sandwiches and tomato soup."

"I like the way you think," she said, getting a glass out of the cupboard and filling it with water from the fridge door. "You should see John working out there."

"I thanked him for helping us. I was dreading doing all that this spring."

She put her glass down and stretched her back out. "Do you think he seems more subdued the last few days?"

"Yeah, he says it's nothing, but I can tell something's off."

"I'm just glad you guys got whatever was going on between you out of your system."

Luckily she was behind me and couldn't see my smile. "We're good. It was just a misunderstanding."

"Do you mind if I ask what it was about?"

I couldn't tell if she was asking because she suspected something or was just being curious. "I'd rather not say if you don't mind, I wouldn't want to betray his confidence." I gave her a look over my shoulder. "Okay?"

The half smile on her face told me she'd just been curious. Patting my back, she said, "You've been like your old self again, that's all that matters."

I got out the frying pan and put in the slices of meatloaf to warm. "Are you looking forward to the party tonight?" I asked.

"I really am. I haven't seen Jenna in a long time and we're both looking forward to catching up. I think the last time we had a visit was when she'd given Steph a graduation party."

"Has it been that long?" I asked, tucking my hair behind my ear and flipping the meatloaf. "I could've sworn you mentioned something more recently."

"I've run into her a few times, but we travel in different circles. I've always liked her, though."

"She always asks about you and not in the generic, polite way. The last time I saw her, she wanted me to help fix you up with someone," I said, glancing at her with an amused grin.

"Don't you go there, Kate, I'll find someone when I'm good and ready," she said with her finger pointed at me, but I noticed her blush.

"Is there anything you want to tell me?"

"No, there's nothing to tell," she said, but wouldn't look me in the eyes.

"I'll ask around at the party, maybe someone's looking for a date for New Year's Eve."

She compressed her lips and shook her head, but still wouldn't look at me. Eventually she admitted, "I've got plans."

"Shut up!" I said, giggling at her red-faced reaction. "I knew you were holding out on me."

"I'm just going out with a few friends for drinks, that's it."

"Sure you are," I said, my voice dripping with sarcasm.

"I'm serious. They're just a group of ladies from the mall," she replied, but I could tell she was trying hard not to smile.

"I'll let you off the hook for now, but if we're gonna be roomies from now on, you'll have to start telling me all the good parts. It's a rule."

"Who's rule?" she asked.

"Doesn't matter, it's just a rule."

She bumped into me playfully. "Is it done yet?"

"Trying to change the subject?"

"No, I'm just hungry."

John walked past just then and said, "Just let me wash my hands and I'll come help."

Mom set the table with sandwich fixings and condiments, while I ladled the soup into bowls. By the time John got back, we were ready to eat.

"I really was going to help," he said.

"You did enough in the garage. It looks so much better." She turned to me. "Did I tell you he rearranged the boxes so they aren't so heavy anymore?"

"You mean he finally convinced you not to pack them like 3D puzzles?"

John laughed. "It was more about splitting the heavier things between different boxes, but she does have a knack for fitting more things in one box than me."

"I'm just efficient from all those years sorting out the back room at the store. Good lunch, Kate, thank you."

"Yes, I love the tomato soup," John said. "So what's the plan for tonight?"

"We have to be there at seven, so we'll leave here by six forty-five or so. It's not that far from here," I replied.

He nodded and went back to his food. As I watched him eat, he suddenly seemed fragile to me. Since Christmas, the changes in our relationship had brought us so much closer. The sadness he'd arrived with was still there, but it was tempered now. I supposed our fiery start had been a distraction for him. I could tell that the warmth we'd developed had helped as well, but I could still see it in his expression at times. His gaze would drift off and his face would fall, making him look lost.

"Penny for your thoughts?" asked Mom. When I noticed she was asking me, I shook my head, then nodded toward John, letting her know the direction my thoughts were taking. She redirected her gaze. "John?"

"Sorry, I was just thinking," he murmured, not realizing that she'd originally asked me.

"You looked so sad just then," she replied.

Wrinkling his forehead, he put on a weak smile and said, "Just thinking, that's all."

"For a guy who's going to a party with a nice girl like Steph, you should be thinking happier thoughts."

"Yeah, about that," he said, "you guys aren't gonna let her run off with me, are you?"

I was amused by the look of panic on his face and watched him squirm while slowly chewing my sandwich.

"I figured you would be interested in a little running off," said Mom, deadpanning her delivery perfectly.

"She's nice, but she's not really my type," he said while purposefully avoiding my eyes. "At the mall the other day, she wouldn't let go of my hand."

"You'll be fine, just be nice to her," Mom encouraged.

"Yes, but will she be nice to me?" he asked, looking unconvinced.

"It's just one night," I said. "What could happen?" I'd been telling him that all week. I'd even accepted she might kiss him under the mistletoe. What helped me deal with it was the knowledge that after her party, he'd be going home with me.

We were dressed and ready by six-thirty. John wore the pants, shirt, and deep green sweater I'd bought for him, and even let me help do his hair. It had grown a little longer in the two weeks he'd been with us, but with a bit of gel and some time with a hair dryer, I had him looking wonderful.

I slipped on a little black dress with a long-sleeved, sequined jacket that came down to my waist. The pearl earrings Mom gave me went perfectly with the short string of pearls Jules had given me for graduation. When I stepped into the living room, John's eyes sparkled. But Mom came in, wearing a black skirt and seasonal sweater, before he could say anything. "So, are we ready to go or what?" she asked.

"Who's driving?" I asked.

"I will," Mom said as she pulled out her keys and jangled them at us. "Let's go!"

It was cold outside, so I grabbed my long, wool coat. John helped me put it on after Mom had gone out to start the car. "You look amazing," he whispered before kissing the back of my neck and pulling the coat all the way up on my shoulders.

When I turned, I touched his cheek and smiled. "Thank you. Don't worry about tonight. Just let go and have fun with her, and whatever happens, I'll be fine. You can give me all the details when we get home."

"If you say so," he said, still not sounding convinced. After he shut the front door and locked it behind us, he asked, "You want the front seat?"

"No, you've got longer legs and Mom's car doesn't have much room in the back."

I climbed in behind Mom and John went around to the passenger's seat. After turning on the heater to full blast, Mom rubbed her arms. "I miss summer."

"Maybe we could go see the beach near Norfolk during spring break," I suggested.

"Oh, that would be so much fun."

John got in and shut the door. "What would be?"

"Kate just suggested that we go to the beach near Norfolk during spring break."

He grinned and winked at me. "That sounds wonderful. I forget what being warm feels like."

"I'll mention it to Susan. Maybe we can all save up and get a beach house together," said Mom as she pulled out of the driveway and headed down the street.

I caught John's eye when he glanced back, and then nodded downwards to direct his gaze to my lap. "Are you getting excited?"

"I don't know if excited is the word," he answered as he turned slightly to look back at me more easily.

I moved my open palms along my thighs and began to pull the edge of my skirt up. "Really? I bet I know someone who's really excited."

His eyes widened when I raised my skirt higher and opened my legs slightly.

"I know Steph certainly is," replied Mom. "She and Jenna were both posting pictures of the preparations in a party album already. Did you know they're having it catered?"

"Really?" asked John as he turned away from me. I could tell he was still watching from the corner of his eye, so I showed him where my thigh-high hosiery stopped, letting him see the bare skin just under my skirt.

Mom was oblivious as she concentrated on the road. "Their Christmas tree has to be over fifteen feet tall! And from the pictures, it looks like there's even an ice sculpture and champagne fountain."

When he licked his lips and glanced at me for a moment, I lifted my skirt and showed him my neatly trimmed mons, sans underwear, causing him to cough suddenly and turn his face crimson.

I straightened my skirt as mom turned to look at John. "Are you okay?"

"I will be," he said as he coughed once more and glared at me. "I just need some of that champagne."

"Well, enjoy yourselves, you two, I'll be happy to drive us all home. Just don't embarrass me, please?"

"We'll be good, Mom. I promise."

"Yup, no trouble from us," John said, trying to suppress his grin.

We arrived just before seven o'clock and there was already a short line of vehicles waiting for the valets to park their cars.

"Man, this place is huge!" said John.

"I told you she was rich," Mom said as she pulled up to the door. "You should see the tennis court and stable out back."

Getting out, we let the valet take Mom's car away just as I heard a squeal coming from the front door. "Oh my God, you're here, you're here, you're here!"

Steph rushed out the door, her silky blue dress flowing around her hips as she threw her arms around John's neck. He tried to dodge her, but she held tight to keep him from avoiding her lips. The moment their lips touched, my stomach turned, but I managed to fix a smile on my face.

Mom laughed and pointed to the mistletoe hanging over the doorway. "Go, Steph!"