Chapter 33: Old Time Rock ‘N Roll – All Summer Long

Mrs. Pierce’s Classroom, Medway High School

1:15pm, Monday, February 26, 1979

“So, why was Hercules required to perform ten or twelve labors?” Mrs. Pierce asked her tenth grade English after a lively introduction to Appolodorus: The Labors of Heracles.

“The Goddess Hera, his step-mother, was jealous of Zeus’ off-spring which included Hercules,” Elizabeth replied. “Zeus was her brother, AND his wife which wasn’t usual at that time.”

“Those statements are both correct, Elizabeth, but it still doesn’t get to why Hercules had to complete his labors,” Mrs. Pierce called out. “Can any of you come up with an answer?”

After giving the class a moment to mull over her question, I put up my hand for the first time in today’s English class. “The sullen one arises from the ash heap,” Mrs. Pierce chuckled out as I did my best to foster my persona as being down in the dumps. “Mr. Nevins, please, please enlighten us before our time is up.”

“Hera tried to kill Hercules numerous times before but she was unsuccessful,” I replied with my face still showing a lack of happiness. Before I continued, I made sure I had glanced into both Lynette’s and Sam’s eyes. With a purposeful tone in my voice, I said, “Therefore, SHE drove him mad and caused him to kill his wife and six sons. When his sanity returned, Hercules deeply regretted his actions, and as penance he placed himself under the authority of King Eurystheus for twelve years. Hercules vowed to do whatever labors were set before him.”

“Very good, Mike,” Mrs. Pierce said as she shut her anthology book and laid it on her desk. “Anything else before the bell rings?”

“There is debate about whether Hercules did these of his own accord to atone for his actions, or if Hera required him to do these labors, which she progressively made more difficult. Originally,” I replied, “there were ten labors. However, the King didn’t recognize two of them because Hercules accepted money for one and he was thought to have had help with another. Therefore, the King assigned two more labors, for a total of twelve.”

“Bravo, oh Greek god scholar,” Mrs. P cackled which brought a small smile to my face for the first time in the class. “We’ll pick up on the debate which Mike mentioned, tomorrow. Does anyone have any final words for a Monday?”

“It is kind of interesting that Hercules is thought to have rescued Hera from being raped by a giant, after these twelve tasks,” Sam chimed in as we started to pack up our books.

“It was interesting that someone, who was treated like crap can still be a pretty decent guy,” Bradley said just before the ending bell to our seventh period rang.

“Yes, Bradley, yes it is very interesting,” I replied as I followed Elizabeth to the front of the room and then to the door.

As the hallways were packed with bustling students, I was easily able to hang back behind Lynette and Sammy as they made their way through the upstairs main hallway. When they turned left to head towards the music room at the rear of the rear of the school, I turned right, and went down the front stairs. I decided I was going to ‘skip’ Mr. Ballows’ eight period music class, today, and work on my own Klingon-like stratagem in the library.

In the far back corner of the library, where I first asked Lynette out, I summoned my cloaked computing device from the energy field surrounding us. With my English anthology and notebook out to create an appropriate studying guise, I thought, ‘What are some cool revenge-oriented songs?‘

Immediately, a small list of songs appeared on my computer screen. I was somewhat taken aback because a few of the songs had dates from 2004 to 2013 beside them. This was the first time I was privy to information from further into my previous 2003 life’s future.

I saw a song from 2010 called, Roman’s Revenge by some Trinidad rapper named Nicki Minaj. Knowing how me and rap music went together like two or more male Betta fighting fish, I didn’t even bother to investigate those lyrics.

Also from 2010, there was a song called, Restart by the neo-soul artist Bilal Oliver from his album called, Airtight’s Revenge. I actually enjoyed listening to it as I read the lyrics on my computer screen. Unfortunately, the flavor of that song didn’t capture what I was hoping to generate during my upcoming stunt.

One song that really got to me was Jewel’s 1995, Foolish Games from her album Pieces of You. I remembered this song because it was also from the 1997 movie, Batman and Robin. I was tempted to use this song as the centerpiece for getting back at Lynette, Cathy and Samantha, but the message was a little too focused on unreciprocated love, which wasn’t the issue between Lynette and me. I still smiled when I pictured George Clooney as Batman/Bruce Wayne and Elle McPherson as Julie Madison. Those two had such chemistry together, but only felt disappointment and distress in their doomed clandestine relationship.

From 2012, the Energists had listed the theme song from the ABC TV series, Revenge. Christina Perri’s Distance was a lovely little ballad about being around someone and not being able to really show or tell them how you feel. Similar to Jewel’s Foolish Games, I didn’t think this song captured the essence of what I had in my mind for these three, maybe four, if Jennifer somehow got sucked in by Lynette and her conniving friends.

The next song on the computer’s screen was the title song from the 1984 comedy classic, Revenge of The Nerds by The Rubinoos. Watching that music video put a smile on my face and caused me to laugh out a little too loudly.

Before I knew it, Mr. Short was waddling down the side passage way and came up to me. “What has gotten you so tickled in my library, Mike?”

“Oh, sorry, Mr. Short,” I replied as I pretended to write some notes down in my English notebook. “I’m reading about the goddess Hera and Hercules for Mrs. Pierce’s class. Some of this translation just tickled my funny bone. I’ll try to keep my future amusements down to a low roar, Sir.”

“Very well, Mike,” Shorty said as he briefly scanned the page of my anthology and saw it was opened to the story on Hercules. “As you said, try to keep your reactions to a library-appropriate level.”

“I will, Mr. Short. Sorry, again about that.”

After he slowly made his way around the outside of the library, I quickly decided that an offshoot of a Revenge of The Nerds type activity might be good as the backdrop for my little payback scheme. However, that specific song wasn’t going to fit with what I had in mind for Lynette, Cathy, Sam and possibly Jennifer’s future experience. Because I wasn’t sure of Jennifer’s role, if any, I knew I’d have to be on my toes around her.

The next song on my cloaked computer screen came from a completely different angle but I thought it, too, might fit my payback scheme. Instead of it being a purely revenge based song, which I was beginning to get away from as I looked at these songs, this song was about an unfortunate ‘break up’. In this song, the guy is always there for his ex-girlfriend, regardless of what she did to him.

‘Hmm,’ I thought, ‘Cathy is an ex-girlfriend. Lynette, who I sure hope doesn’t become an ex-girlfriend based on all this. Yuppers, this song was going to be the foundation for my paybacks.’

I was a little surprised that I didn’t think of this song on my own because of who performed it. As I allowed this Def Leppard song to percolate in my head, things began to gel perfectly with what I had in mind for my female band mates. With one of my favorite British rock band’s songs now clearly set within my consciousness, I was able to visually picture the exact sequence of surprising events for my three, possibly four, favorite troublemakers, Lynette, Cathy, Samantha and Jennifer.

I knew I’d have to have the Energists’ help to carry out some of the special effects I wanted to use but as soon as I ran my final production through my head, a new five-line message popped on my computer screen. If I hadn’t just told Ole-Shorty that I’d try to keep it down, I would have busted my gut laughing, as I read:

­’We’ve got you covered, Dr. Cuda.

Everything will be ready and set when needed.

We’re looking forward to this, as well!

Your friend,

Musician-Pink-Alpha, and a few of your other Energist friends.’

Just as I was about ready to wrap things up with the computer, when the one ‘unknown variable’ in my cold revenge plot, Jennifer Rathje, came walking towards me down the side passage in the library. Because I wasn’t sure if she was in on the other three girls’ conspiracy, I made sure my computer was still cloaked.

“Cuda, what are you doing back here? I thought you had the ‘Little-Man’ in the eighth period,” the dark haired, brunette quizzed me as she stepped up to my little table.

“You caught me,” I replied, “I’m skipping music today. Are you going to rat me out?”

“Why would you even bother to ask me that?” Jennifer replied indignantly. “You know I’d never do something like that.” She then scooted to the opposite side of the small work desk and sat down.

“The way my luck has been going today, I figured you might be another harbinger of bad news. Sorry for thinking you’d rat on me, Jenn.”

“What’s going on with you?” Jennifer genuinely asked as she saw my faux-melancholy facial expression. “I figured you’d be flying as high as a kite, today. You should be on top of the world ... being the leading scorer in our victory over Strathroy, and having your girlfriend named to the All-Ontario volleyball team.”

“I take it, then, you haven’t heard? I’m DEEP in Lynette’s doghouse over an incident with Cathy in the limousine, from Saturday.”

“No, I haven’t heard. What happened? Why are you in her doghouse?”

“I’m not good with sharing too much private information on things, but let’s just say Cathy and I probably got a little too frisky when we were horsing around on our trip back from Sarnia.” I did my best to gauge Jennifer’s facial and bodily responses to this news, hoping to determine whether she was hearing it for the first time or was she possibly a fourth co-conspirator with the other girls in the band. So far, Jennifer gave off the impression that she was honestly in the dark with regards to this relationship issue, and the other girls’ scheme. However, I still kept my ‘Pair of Aces’ close to my vest.

“Because Cathy and I agreed that we shouldn’t hide our unplanned friskiness from her...” I added after pausing for a moment to let that part of the story sink in, “ ... uh, Lynette didn’t take our admission too well when Cathy talked with her during her fifth period lunch. I heard that she stormed out of the cafeteria, and now, my name is worse than Mud with Lynette.”

“Oh man,” Jennifer whispered and reached across the table and laid her soft hands over mine. “You haven’t talked to either Lynette or Cathy, after all this? Jeezes, Mike, what do you think this will do to our band?”

“No,” I replied to her first question. “I have no inkling what Lynette thinks of Cathy or how Cathy is dealing with all this. As for our band’s future, I have no idea what this will do to it?”

“Oh shit!” Jennifer replied and then slapped her right hand over her mouth. Her eyes got real wide as she took a quick peek around to see if anyone else heard her colorful, yet appropriate, expletive. “Sorry ‘bout that,” she said to me after it appeared that no else heard her sharp cuss word.

“You just said what I’ve been thinking and feeling, Jenn.”

“So, I guess we’ll have to play it by ear as to whether we’re going to practice at Sam’s house this evening, huh?”

“I would think. I’ve got basketball from three to five, and was going to ride with Sam, or maybe you to Sam’s place after your school band practice. Now, I guess I’ll have plan for either getting a ride home or over to Sam’s house.”

“Either way, you can ride with me if you like,” Jennifer said as she patted my hands with hers.

“Thanks, at least one of the girls in the band is talking to me.”

“Just me? What else has happened?”

“It seems that Sam has taken Lynette’s side. The two of them gave me their cold shoulders and evil-eyes in English. I’m still unsure of Cathy’s state of mind towards me.”

“I can’t believe Sam is taking sides in this,” Jennifer said after I finished up that short explanation.

“I could be wrong about Sam, but...”

“We’ll get to the bottom of this,” Jennifer seriously stated which I suddenly realized might throw a monkey wrench into my ‘payback’ plans.

“Promise me that you won’t go off on them,” I softly requested to Jennifer. When she barely nodded her agreement to my request, I added, “I messed up with Cathy on Saturday, so let’s just give Lynette the time she needs to process all this crap. No sense in kicking a hornet’s nest when the nasty critters are already on the war-path.”

“Okay, Cuda,” Jennifer said with a soft smile. Then, she decided to change the tenor of our conversation by excitedly saying, “At least my Saturday was way better than your Monday!”

“Yeah ... I don’t think it would have taken much to top my Monday,” I answered with a semi-confused look on my face. I already heard about her gymnastics exploits, so I was wondering just where was this headed?

“Well...” Jennifer got all quiet and squirmy as she began to relate her Saturday night event, “Colleen and I never ... made it down to the pool at the Armouries. We, uh ... spent our time...”

As soon as Jennifer mentioned that they didn’t go for a swim, I was pretty sure what happened in their hotel room. As the beautiful brunette sitting across from me, uncharacteristically struggled with her words, I held up my right hand and interrupted her with, “Jennifer, you don’t have to go into any type of details on what you and Colleen did or didn’t do. All I, or anyone for that matter, really needs to know is, did you gals have a good time together?”

“Oh, Lord! Yes!” Jennifer replied as she did a great ‘ants-in-her-pants‘ type dance on her library chair. “We, uh, hit it off real well, and...” I held up my hand again to stop what I thought was going to be a ‘too much information’ moment.

Jennifer looked at me like I was crazy for wanting to stop her description of her Saturday night activities. After a moment, she asked, “You don’t want to hear what we did? I thought everyone liked hearing ab...”

“Jennifer,” I interjected to my beautiful band mate, “Most folks do like hearing about what two consenting people may or may not have done. However, I think that some things are best left to the imagination. Answer me this, after I relate what I’m thinking, okay?”

Jennifer gave me a sharp head bob, so I began my descriptive image. “Right now, I’m sorta picturing a beautiful, petite redhead and a gorgeous brunette in some state of undress and in some state of sensual bliss. You can’t tell what I’m seeing, but I bet your real experience is probably close to or hopefully better than my mental picture. Now, what do you think is the better option? You describing what happened in great detail to convey the true situation, or you barely setting the stage, and then leaving the rest up to me to create that ideal mental picture of you and Colleen?”

“Damn, Cuda!” she replied with a huge smile on her pretty face. She then chortled, “If I didn’t know you like I do, I probably would reach over and slap your face for the wicked image I think you’re creating of me and Colleen.”

“Exactly,” I replied with a genuine smile. “Now that I know you and Colleen didn’t go swimming but enjoyed some alone time in her hotel room, is it really important for you to share those intimate details with me?”

Her soft sigh and gentle smile gave me her non-verbal reply. Jennifer surprised the crap out of me, however, when she shared one piece of information I would not have imaged in a million years. “Uh, we ... me and Colleen are planning on getting together again when she comes back for the Ontario Championships. And, uh ... Colleen said she ... would really, REALLY love it ... if, well, if YOU would join her, join me and her, for some girl-girl-guy fun.”

“What? ... Colleen ... You ... want me?” I stumbled and fumbled my way around that bit of unbelievable news.

“Somehow, she ... as we were cuddling on the bed after, you know ... she, uh, simply asked me to ask you about possibly joining us ... for a night of...”

“Jenn,” I interrupted her as she tried to relate Colleen’s post-lovemaking request to me. “I’m, uh, I’m already ‘Up a creek, without a paddle‘ with Lynette. Just how am I, are we, supposed to pull this off without both of us becoming public enemy, Number One and Two with our band mates?”

“I don’t know,” Jennifer sheepishly replied before adding, “I told Colleen that you were in a relationship with another girl, one of our band members and that I didn’t think it would happen. She simply smiled back at me and I quote here, ‘Just ask Mike, and he’ll work it out... SOMEHOW.’ She even emphasized the ‘somehow’ to me. Then, on my way home later that night, I got this crazy feeling that Colleen knew you ... because of her ‘plain as day‘ approach when she said that to me.”

That was the second major surprise from this conversation with Jennifer. I then remembered that Colleen said something to me after we ate about not wanting to wait until we were together at UWO in 1984 to experience the incredible sexual sensations from being with a man, with me.

“Damn nation,” I softly said and then introspectively thought, ‘Is this really what is supposed to happen during my rebooted life? Lynette and her mother definitely appear to be highly liberated ladies, and aren’t the least bit ashamed of their sexuality. Maybe my little episode with Cathy in the limousine, and hearing this from Jennifer, is a sign for me and my friends to truly go beyond the norm, beyond things from my first trip through high school.‘

“Earth to Cuda,” I heard Jennifer say as she snapped me from my brief self-analysis. “Are you alright? Did you hear the warning bell for the eighth period?”

“Yeah, Jennifer, I’m fine,” I replied as my thoughts became more focused on what track I should take with my redone life. “I’ll, uh, have to think, long and hard about what you just told me ... about Colleen, okay?”

“Oh, yeah, I understand completely,” she replied as she pushed away from our little table and stood up. “I hope everything works out for you ... with Lynette. I sure would hate to see you two split up, because all of us might have to deal with it, band-wise.”

“I, uh, just have a funny feeling that all this will work itself out,” I said as I closed up my anthology and English notebook. I inwardly smiled when I realized the hidden meaning with my use of ‘funny feeling’. At least I hoped my band mates would take what I planned to do as funny. “Who knows, Jennifer, maybe we should have named our band, Peyton Place, instead of Time Bandits.”

Jennifer’s confused look at my backhanded reference to the 1956 novel, and mid-1960s TV show about salacious sexual activities in a tight-knit community, let me know I was somewhat safe in exploring my prior introspective thoughts with my friends. I figured I better change topics with Jennifer, so I said, “I’ll see you after my practice, and uh, we’ll either head south to Sammy’s for Time Bandit practice or north to our homes. Sound good?”

“Sure does,” Jennifer replied as she put a little extra wiggle into her PHAT butt on the way out of the library. This time, when she peered over her shoulder, she saw a smile on my face and asked, “Now that’s an appreciative look. I like seeing that from you.” With that, the smiling brunette began a ‘model-like’ walking motion which really exaggerated the lovely swing in her skin-tight blue-jeans.

“I was going to talk with you before music started, but you weren’t there,” Lynette hotly said as she came in and sat down beside me in Geography class. “Where were you?”

“I went to the library to try and clear my head. I figured I was the last person you’d want to talk to right now.”

“Hmmm,” Lynette snorted and then said, “I’m royally pissed at you, right now. I can’t believe you’d do something with your ex-girlfriend, especially right after I hurt my shoulder. It’s like ... you couldn’t wait for my shoulder to get better, so you ran to Cathy to get your jollies? Jeezes, Mike, you fit your new nickname to a ‘T’ ... Barra... CUDA?”

This was exactly what I would have expected to hear from Lynette if I truly believed she was upset with me. Instead, her continuation of this skullduggery was actually giving me more ammo to use in my upcoming counter-offensive. I did my best to act contrite, and I took everything Lynette was dishing out like a whipped puppy with his tail tucked between his legs.

When I sensed that her butt-whoopin’ was over, I kept my head down and simply said, “I’m sorry, Lynette. I doubt there is anything else I can say to make it right ... to make this go away.”

“Damn, straight!” she fired off at me as I looked down towards my feet. To her, I hoped it looked like I was groveling and worn out from this confrontation. To me, it was a defense mechanism to keep me from slipping up and giving her a ‘Tell’ about my knowledge of their feminine ruse. “There’s nothing you can say to make this right, Mike, absolutely nothing.”

“What’s going on over there?” Mr. St. Georges asked as he walked into our classroom, dressed in one of his trademark sweat suits. “Are you two going to play nice or am I going to have to put a little space between you?”

“We can play nice, Sir,” I softly offered and looked up at Lynette’s face for the first time since she fired her heavy artillery towards me.

“Lynette?” our teacher asked.

“I’m good. Sorry about my outburst there.”

“Alright, then,” Froggy said as he made his way over to his geography supplies. “Mr. Lunby, can you get that film projector set up for me, please. I’d like to end our unit on Australia with a beautiful film on the diverse scenery and animal species, which are unique to that part of the world. Tomorrow will be your last day to get your project and/or presentation together at least using class time. Here is the sign-up sheet for doing your presentations, if you haven’t gotten a slot yet.”

“Sir,” Henrietta Marttens said as she looked at the sign-up sheet. “Why are Lynette and Mike getting an extra ten minutes to do their presentation on Thursday?”

“They are going to do something extra in their presentation and have asked for that additional time. If anyone else thinks they need a little more than one of those ten minute slots, come see me. If I think you’ll make good use of that extra time, I’ll gladly accommodate you, like I did with Lynette and Mike.”

As Jon helped Mr. St. Georges get the film projector set up, I asked Lynette, “Do you think you’ll be able to play the keyboards in Thursday’s class?”

“Well, if you were in music you’d have seen me playing the piano. My arm is a little sore, but I just took another Tylenol before I came here, so it should get to feeling better, shortly.”

I must say Lynette was good at playing the heart-broken, damsel in distress. Her acid tongue could have melted steel with her initial answer. As her tone softened on the second part of her answer, I figured it was safe to ask a follow-up question and not have my head bitten off. “Have, uh, you thought about what Aussie songs you’d like to include in our presentation?”

“Um,” she replied and then put her left hand under her chin in thought. “We probably should include a song or two from ... AC/DC, the BeeGees, Olivia Newton-John, and uh, the Little River Band. Am I missing any other key Aussie groups or individuals that you think would add to our medley?”

I quickly realized that when her thoughts weren’t on carrying out her deceptive scheme, Lynette promptly reverted back to the young lady I had grown to love during these past few weeks. That brought a small smile to my forlorn face.

However, I soon recognized the implication of my previous thought; ‘that I had grown to LOVE, Lynette‘. My mind immediately took off on a crazy tangent. I suddenly struggled to integrate that new concept with my own devious plans regarding my friends. Then, when I added in the possibility that our new and exciting sex-life was about to take a titanic leap into the unknown, a nuclear bomb could have exploded under my seat and I would have been oblivious to that impending mushroom cloud.

“Mike,” Lynette softly whispered and shook my arm when I didn’t respond to her previous question. “Are you alright, Sug?” My faux-upset girlfriend must have realized that she was starting to blow her cover as her words showed genuine concern for me before she abruptly nipped her pet name for me in the bud.

“What? ... Oh yeah, uh, I was just thinking ‘bout...” I stumbled out as I watched Lynette zip back into her ‘I’m still pissed‘ mood. “ ... Never mind. I, uh, think we may need to do a song from Helen Reddy and, uh, Air Supply. We might want to do something from Midnight Oil, too.”

When the film started, Lynette moved her stool over a little closer to mine and tapped me on the shoulder. She then mouthed, “What songs are you thinking of including in our medley?”

I smiled at her and saw the real gleam of passion and concern in her eyes before I took my pencil and jotted down a few possible songs. I began my list with the BeeGees’ songs, If I Can’t Have You, I’ve Got to Get a Message to You, and Nights on Broadway. Then I wrote down Helen Reddy’s, I Am Woman, followed by Olivia Newton-John’s, Please Mister, Please and I Honestly Love You.

Lynette saw those songs and pointed to Nights on Broadway, I Am Woman and then to I Honestly Love You. She then gave me a ‘thumbs-up’ sign after gently tapping her finger over that last song title.

‘Dang,’ I thought, ‘What is she trying to tell me with that song selection and her hand actions?‘

I simply nodded in response and then wrote down, Cool Change by the Little River Band and Lost in Love by Air Supply.

Lynette then tapped me on the arm and used her finger to ‘air-write’, AC/DC?

I chuckled at her and wrote down a list of three kick ass songs by the best, hard rocking band from the island continent. I jotted down, TNT, Dirty Deeds and their classic rock anthem, It’s a Long Way to the Top, If You Want to Rock and Roll.

Lynette’s confused look at that last song title meant I’d have to do some serious explaining about that killer rock anthem. I put that song down because it included Bon Scott playing a mean ‘bag-pipes’ along with Angus Young’s kick-ass guitar. I turned to her and mouthed, ‘I’ll talk with you about this song later, okay?‘

Lynette just nodded her head and her long wavy, blonde hair bounced beautifully around her pensive smile. I knew it was taking a major effort on her part to keep her ruse-filled persona going, so I immediately helped her by reverting to my whipped puppy state of mind.

My action was a good thing as Mr. St. Georges made a loud, “Ah hum,” towards us. When I looked over at him, he was giving me his best, ‘I’m warning you‘ look. Thankfully, my sullen look accomplished two tasks. My teacher took it as contrition for doing something I shouldn’t have been doing, and Lynette seemed to see it as my continuation of being down in the dumps.

At the conclusion of our class film, and the expected question and answer session afterwards, I helped Lynette pack up her things and offered to carry her book bag to her locker. When she didn’t flat out decline my offer, I picked up our things and followed her out the door. I thought I saw her share a small wink with Samantha as the little redhead walked on past our turn in the hallway. My guess was she was going down to Paul’s locker to see him before their orchestra practice.

As I held onto Lynette’s bag I saw she was struggling with her lock, so I set my book bag down and held the silver device in my hand, so she could manipulate the tumbler with her non-dominant left hand a little more easily. After she opened the lock, she looked up to me, and with an icy stare, simply said, “Thanks.”

“Are, uh, we...” I struggle to get out as she took her book bag from my hand, “ ... still going, uh...”

“Are we still dating? A couple? Is that what you’re trying to ask me?” Lynette snapped back at me.

“Uh, no. That wasn’t what I was going to ask you, but your thoughts on that question might give me the answer to my question. Are we still going to be able to work as band members and practice, tonight?”

My question seemed to take a little of the wind out of her sails. Lynette looked down in her locker for a second before she sternly replied, “I guess we can work things out for the good of the band. I have really enjoyed playing with everyone.”

“Okay,” I softly said. “I’m not going to ask you what your thoughts are on the question you put out there. I think it might be best, if you took...”