It's a Helluva Job
Chapter 5

Copyright© 2013 by Anne N. Mouse

Tribune Whitefeather, accompanied by a very androgynous person in a lab coat, led us through a scanty collection of Sa'arm bodies and weapons. It was evident from the damage to most of the bodies that they had been exposed to vacuum. Tribune Whitefeather explained that collecting Sa'arm specimens from spacecraft that had been opened to space had proved to be the easiest way to obtain them.

We were also shown a drawing of a Sa'arm warren. I didn't ask how it had been obtained but did wonder if the knowledge was worth the cost. From what I'd seen of a couple of other clips of combat footage, the Sa'arm were unparalleled sappers. From what I was told and saw, it seemed to me that going into one of their tunnels was a good way to find oneself trapped in a classic pincer movement.

I saw a few Sa'arm units that were in various stages of dissection and asked if we'd discovered any type of poisons that could be used against them, either food or airborne. I even suggested that if we could discover a disease that they were vulnerable to that the best way to spread it would be to have rats as carriers.

I was told that most of my suggestions had been considered but that for the most part the Sa'arm seemed particularly impervious to poisons and disease. "The perfect weapon," I commented. I did not know how true that was but it seemed to me to be a good possibility that some galactic race had designed the Sa'arm as a weapon of war and then been consumed by them.

The tour of the area where the sum total of humanity's knowledge of the Sa'arm was held only served to solidify my decision. I knew in my bones that unless we got a lot of outside support, we were in deep trouble. And from what I could gather from both people who had volunteered information and from my short interaction with the AI that had been monitoring the hospital, such support would not likely be forthcoming. All that remained then was for me to attempt to negotiate the terms of my service. I reflected wryly that I was getting treatment that I'd bet very few volunteers had received.

"I'd like to return to Earth if it is not too much of a problem," I told Tribune Whitefeather. "I need a way to contact the Confederacy and some time to put a plan in action to gather another concubine it seems."

"If you're going to volunteer, there is no reason to leave the moon colony," Tribune Whitefeather said.

"I'm not currently volunteering, sir," I said, "and even if I were, I would want to see that my departure didn't create havoc for some people, as well as for Sheba, my dog who I will not go without."

"That is going to be a tall order," Tribune Whitefeather said.

"Still that is at least one of my conditions. I will not serve if I cannot take Sheba. She is likely the main reason that I'm available to ask about serving," I stated emphatically.

"That is not something I'm able to negotiate," Tribune Whitefeather said, "However I do believe that we can provide a secure website that will allow you to communicate with the AI that is able to negotiate that issue."

I nodded impatiently as I really wanted to escape the current situation that I was in. I realized that if the AI that wanted me to serve wished to do so it could simply hold me until I agreed or otherwise make my life miserable if it desired to. I'd just begun to wonder if that was its intention when a rather impressively beautiful woman wearing about the ugliest gray dress that barely covered her butt and vulva hustled in and said, " Tribune Whitefeather, my master, DECO Chief Chandler, sent me to deliver this." She then handed me what appeared to be an ordinary thumb drive.

Before I could ask what the purpose of the device was she explained, "The AI that is assisting my Master insisted that you have this. It will work with any computer and transform it into a secure communication portal to the AI with which you will most likely be working."

Being male, I watched with interest as the woman left the room. The movement of her breasts under the scanty shift that she was wearing said that it was entirely possible that the only clothing she was wearing was that ugly garment. "Be sure to pack some fancy clothes and especially underwear that fits if you really want to be a concubine," I told Lori a bit facetiously.

"More than one sponsor or concubine has found that such things are in great demand among the human colonies," Tribune Whitefeather said.

"I thought that replicators could make anything," I said.

"Not really," our guide spoke for the first time, not at all increasing my certainty as to what sex to assign to 'him', as I decided until I was told otherwise. "A replicator can only make things it has a pattern for. As a great many people have been evacuated with only the clothes on their backs, and often very few of those, there are not a lot of clothing patterns available to replicators. Also because of the distance between stars there is not a lot of cross-pollination of designs for such things which are considered to be low priority items."

 
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