Chapter 3

I had been coasting through my personal life for the last six months. Somehow, in the back of my mind, I had been convinced that Leanne would return and in some way we would return to the marriage I believed we had shared.

The decision to file for divorce created a huge feeling of depression. I continued to work as it was the only life I had left. Away from work, I became a virtual vegetable. I started taking drugs to go to merciful sleep and then I had to take pills to be alert enough to continue at work.

Again, my boss came to my rescue. He noticed very quickly that I was again sliding down into a deep depression. With his encouragement, I began to seek counseling. This time, I was able to climb out of the deep abyss much more quickly than with my first bout of depression. I realized that no matter what I may have done wrong in my relationship with Leanne, I did not deserve her callous abandonment.

My lawyer was a great lady. I had expected an impersonal and business like legal-beagle, but was very quickly made comfortable and at ease with her. Sarah Dixon was compassionate and caring but all the while remained completely professional. She seemed to understand my feelings and insecurities and always tried to support me while working toward a divorce that I really did not want.

It only took a few meetings with Sarah to get most of the arrangements straightened out and completed. Leanne had actually helped the process when she had stripped our accounts of half of all our monies. In fact, Sarah had been surprised that Leanne had not taken more. She said that it was typical that one or the other partner would rape the money accounts.

Sarah was also surprised that in all this time I had done nothing to protect myself from further financial disaster. With her help, I did those things that I had neglected for so long. All joint accounts were closed and re-opened in my name only. All credit cards with both of our names were canceled and those accounts closed. I gave Sarah notarized copies of all bank documents so she could show the courts the actions that I had taken.

The only good thing about taking these actions was finding out that, since I had brought our home to the marriage, it was mine free and clear. It was paid off with no liens of any kind. I had actually made the purchase in anticipation of my marriage to Leanne. Just the matter of my name being the only one on the deed and by completing the purchase just days before the wedding made me about $240,000 richer.

When all was done and Sarah was ready to file my petition for divorce with the courts, I decided to call Sam. It had only been a few days since we had last visited. Even though, I had mentioned to her that I would be seeing a lawyer and about filing for a divorce, I was still just a little nervous about telling her that it was actually happening. I asked her to meet with me.

"Sam, I'm sure that you realized that it's been almost eight months since your mother left me. I had hoped that she would change her mind and come back to me. I have finally admitted to myself that she is really gone."

She looked at me and I could see the sadness and fear in her eyes. I decided to get right to it because I could see that she was becoming quite upset. "I have filed for divorce. I will have a process server try to deliver the papers to your Mom in a few days, after my attorney files them with the courts."

"I knew the longer this went on that something like this was going to happen." Sam looked me straight in the eye as she continued, "Although I see Mom almost every week, she has made it very clear that she will not talk about you and what happened. Just let me know when she will be served so that I can be close by to support her if she needs it."

Somehow I was surprised at the frequency of contact between Sam and Leanne. I guess I really had not thought about it much. I don't know why but this actually hurt my feelings just a bit. Sam must have noticed something because, "Dad please don't be hurt. Mom had asked me not to talk to you about seeing her. I also could see that you really did not want to hear about her as well."

"Honey, would you please call my lawyer with your mother's address. I don't know where she is and I don't want the temptation of knowing. I am afraid that I would try to see her. Sarah has drilled into me that from this point on I can't have any contact with Leanne except through lawyers and the courts."

She assured me that she would call Sarah before the day was done. On that sad note, we concluded our visit. The vacancy in my heart was still there and I was sure that it would take a long, long time to heal if ever.

For the next few days, I went to work and then home. I didn't try to contact Sam and I knew if Sarah wanted to talk to me then she would call. It was on Friday afternoon that Sarah called me letting me know that my soon-to-be ex-wife had been served. Less than a half hour later, my secretary told me that my daughter was on the phone.

"Hi Sam, I assume you are calling me about the divorce papers being served on your mom?

"Dad, I just got off the phone with Mom. She was so mad that I could barely make sense of her words. She said a lot of things, but she kept repeating that it would be a cold day in hell before she gave you a divorce."

"What? I don't understand. She left me. She took half of all our money. She has not spoken a civil word to me in almost nine months. I'm sorry but I just don't understand why she would contest the divorce. Other than the money she took out of our accounts, I haven't given her a dime."

"It's a complete mystery to me also. I mean, she won't even talk to me about it. My own mother leaves my dad and gets up and walks away every time I try to discuss it with her. Now when the shit finally hits the fan, she is all angry and surprised that her husband wants out of the marriage. It's like she has really lost all contact with reality except where it directly concerns her."

If it wasn't such a tragedy to me, I would have laughed out loud. My wife is angry with me because I want to divorce her. The abandonment of me and our marriage apparently are not factors to be considered in the decision that I made to divorce her. Her far less than loving behavior towards me, obviously in her opinion, should not cause me to take such a dastardly step.

"Well she has the number for my attorney so I should not have to deal with her at least directly. However if you should hear that the she-devil is heading my way, give me fair warning and I will run as fast as possible in the opposite direction. Really, Sam, I have lost all desire to speak personally with your mother."

Shortly after that, we ended our conversation. No sooner had I replaced the receiver than the phone rang again. I looked at the caller ID and felt the blood run from my face. It was the She-Devil herself. Being the intelligent and brave soul that I am, I let it go to voice mail. Then I deleted the message without listening to it.

A few minutes later, the phone rang again. And again, it was my wife. I repeated steps one and two and then muted the ringer for the phone. These new office phones have all kinds of features. I was lucky that with my promotion some months ago, I had been given a new cell phone with a new number. I was sure that Leanne did not have that number.

The thought of what mischief my wife could be up to unsettled me and ensured that I spent a restless night. I dozed throughout the night but never really achieved an actual sleep state. The next morning, I wearily entered my office where I was greeted by my secretary.