Chapter 4: A Short Beach Vacation

Emily and I managed to go without contact for ten days. I was staring at my empty desktop when I gave in by texting, “Just want to know how you’re doing.”

For most of the day, I kept checking my phone. It was like being waterboarded by some vision in skimpy but elegant lingerie. Emily didn’t respond until late evening. “I miss you, Jerry.”

For a few days we tried to go back to sexting, but it was more frustrating than titillating, even with Emily’s dirty girl photos. In the meantime, I obsessed about Emily being set up with wealthy older men through The Bad Girls Club and doing more with them than she had with me. I finally texted, “Can we talk tonight?”

She quickly texted back “Jerry, if it make you feel any better, I know it’s wrong too. Cheryl’s my friend. You only fuck your close friend’s father in porn movies and in West Virginia. It’s just that it felt so right to me to have you at my show that night. Can I help it that you have a gorgeous cock?”

“7:30 okay?”

“xxxx.”

At 6:45, Cheryl called as I was getting into my car.

“Dad, how are you? It’s like you’re never around.”

“Does this mean that you miss me?”

“Of course I miss you. I thought you might be bored just being around other old folk all the time.”

“It’s not that boring. Can’t I just miss my own daughter?”

“Did I tell you that my friend Emily got her first professional show?”

My throat tightened as I considered the possibility that my own daughter was testing me.

“That’s wonderful! Tell her congratulations for me.”

“I wish I could have seen it.”

“What was the show?”

“Chorus Line. Remember, you took me to see it in London?”

It was our first father daughter trip after the divorce with Jodie. I let her shop for clothes at Harrod’s that day and the show was part of her first grown up night out. I even let her bring a glass of wine to our seats.

“Of course, how could I ever forget Chorus Line?”

“Her show’s in Pittsburgh. I know you go there for work a lot. You should check it out.”

“If it’s still running, I’ll make a point of it.”

“That’s what I love about you, Dad.”

“What’s that?”

“Anyone else’s Dad would go to their own kid’s show, they’d hardly ever make a point of seeing some friend of their kid’s in a show in some strange city. They’d just say they were too busy. You’d do something like that just for me.”

I squeezed the steering wheel at 9 and 3, as I did my best to concentrate on the suddenly seemingly treacherous road ahead. Cheryl and I talked for a while longer, but it felt like I barely remembered anything else about our conversation until I said.”Cheryl, if your friend Emily gets another big show I’ll fly you there and we can see it together.”

“I’d love that. She’s given up so much to get into theater. Emily’s so incredibly pretty and I don’t think she’s ever even had a regular boyfriend. At least she’s never mentioned one, though lately I’ve sort of wondered.”

I chose my words carefully.”Well I remember that she was really talented. I’m sure she’ll meet the right guy when it’s time, just like you will someday.”

“Dad, I don’t know about that. Me, I mean.”

“You’ll find someone. You’re too pretty, too smart, too sweet.”

“You’re just saying that because you’re my father. Guys just totally drool over Emily. They’ve never done that around me. I swear, sometimes they’d do the stupidest things around her.”

“Emily’s very cute, but...”

“Your daughter’s cuter?”

“Naturally.”

“Now I know you’re just trying to make me feel better. It’s like their common sense checks out around her. Even some of the teachers were like that. You’re probably the only man in the world who’d even consider saying something like that.”

“Cheryl, it’s not about being swarmed by guys, it’s about finding the right guy. Doesn’t your mom tell you that too?”

“She does, but that’s not the way she acts. Men are always flirting with her, even some of my friends. Sometimes it seems like guys my age would rather hit on her instead of me. Talk about having your ego deflated.”

“Your mother’s always been a flirt. I don’t think she knows how to turn it off. That’s not who you are and I’m kind of glad you aren’t. I just think you take these things more seriously.”

“Like father like daughter? Speaking of which, Mom says she thinks you’re seeing someone.”

“Me? Why would she say that?”

“She says you’ve been really distracted lately.”

“Just work stuff. You know, the usual.”

“Well, I hope Mom’s right and that you’re just not telling me about whatever you’ve got going on yet. I thought maybe the lady you’d been seeing there had a change of heart or something.”

“If I do, you’ll be the first to know. Love you, Cheryl!”

“Love you too, Dad.”

“Dad, promise me that if you get involved with a woman that you’ll introduce her to me this time.”

“I’ll do my best.”

It was 7:20 when we got off the phone. Was this a warning or an omen of some kind? Emily phoned seven minutes later, just as I pulled into my own garage.

“So Jerry are you alone?”

“I just got off the phone with Cheryl. She wants me to go see you in Chorus Line.”

“Oh God! What did you tell her?”

“I acted like I had no idea you were in a show, but told her I’d go if I happened to be in Pittsburgh. I also told her that I’d take her to your next show.”

“If you did that, it would be wonderful. Cheryl’s like the sister I never had.”

“And I’m like the father you never had?”

Emily didn’t answer at first.

“Better you than some creepy bass player.”

“At least he’s not a drummer.”

“Actually Mom’s brought home a couple of those too. Sometimes I feel like my mother is the world’s oldest groupie.”

“No, that would be Cheryl’s mother.”

“I’ve never seen her as the musician type. Jodie’s got more of a slutty milf vibe, if you ask me. I’m into older guys, but when I play with girls I like them my own age. I’d do Jodie. I mean if she wasn’t Cheryl’s mom. That would be wrong. I don’t know if you know this, Jodie used to hang out with my mom a little.”

I was now seriously wondering if Emily and Cheryl knew everything and if the two were messing with me.

“Emily, could we maybe talk about something other than my ex-wife? This is all weird enough.”

“Sure, what do you want to ask? It’s probably your turn to bring up some incredibly uncomfortable question.”

Part of my attraction to Emily was that she always seemed to be one step ahead in our conversations. I had no doubt that she’d been the one who seduced me at the lingerie store.

“Emily, I’ve never asked. Do you know who your biological father is?”

“No, I don’t even know his first name.”

“I’m sorry.”

For a minute, neither of us said anything.

“Jerry, I’ve been thinking.”

“So have I.”

“Anyway, I’ve decided that you need to come to Pittsburgh and fuck me.”

I touched my crotch. Having sex with Emily had been just about the only thing I’d thought about since the Chorus Line after-party.

“You know you want to do it. I want to do it. We’re both adults. I think about it all the time, “ she said.

“But, Emily, we talked about this.” My quavery voice tone was almost an invitation for her to talk me out of whatever “this” was.

“The more I think about this, we’ve already gone too far, Jerry. What’s the difference between my blowing you and our doing more than that? If Cheryl found out, I’m sure just hearing about what happened between us at Discretions would freak her out. My fucking you isn’t really a whole lot worse. In fact, it’s maybe even a little more respectable. Instead of my giving you a blow job in some hotel room, we could say we had dinner together, had a little too much to drink, and wound up spending the night. Throw in the whole Bad Girls Club part and what we already did more or less pins the sleaze meter as far as Cheryl’s concerned. Face it Jerry, neither of us planned what happened.”

“We didn’t plan it, but it’s going to hurt her.” This time I sounded more convincing. I was sitting at my kitchen table. I’d unzipped my fly to relieve the pressure of imagining myself finally making love to Emily.

“Jerry, I know you meant to come see my show, say “Hi!”, then go home. Neither of us knew that I was going to be your paid date that night. Nature just took its course. It was nothing more than that. At this point, we want to fuck. It’s all good as long as we stop before Cheryl finds out. I know I can trust you not to say anything.”

Was I thinking with the wrong head? Emily was making perfect sense. I was checking flights to Pittsburgh on my laptop and had already booked a room at the Regency.

“Emily, why is it that we keep promising this is all we’ll do?”

“Well, we haven’t done it all yet. Is it wrong of me to want that? We already crossed the line. We might as well do it right, before we go back to whatever the right side of that line is.”

“Emily, can we think about this for a couple days?”

“Of course.”

Three days later, I called her. “You don’t know how badly I want to do this, but I keep thinking about Cheryl calling me just before I talked to you the other night.”

“You said yourself that she seems to have no idea.”

“I hope that’s true and I guess I need it to stay that way. I’m her father. You’re her friend.”

A long silence was followed by an equally long sigh.

“I just wish, I had better luck with men.”

“Emily, you’ll make some lucky guy really happy someday. You know this is as difficult for me as it is for you.”

She hung up. I tried calling back 3 times, but she must have blocked all cliches from middle-aged men. A few days later she sent a text: “I wanted you to be my first.”

I worried that she might be drunk or even a little off mentally. Was it even possible that she’d sent her text to the wrong guy? It seemed a little unlikely that I’d be the only guy in her life. I waited a couple days and texted her, “I really care about you, Emily. Just tell me that you’re okay.”

This received a quick reply: “fine.”

I texted a brief answer, but noticed that she’d blocked my number. Unfortunately, she hadn’t blocked my heart. I thought about her constantly, so much so that I started sending an associate for my business calls to Pittsburgh. For the second time in a row, I’d gotten emotionally involved with a woman who was unavailable for a serious relationship. If I were to count Jodie’s nymphomania, it was actually three.

Two months passed. I was proud of my ability to keep discipline and not try to call Emily, but that didn’t mean that I hadn’t been thinking about it or her constantly. In the meantime, I hadn’t dated or paid for companionship. I sense myself drifting into that dangerous male condition of being toxically lonely and horny. I decided to call Darcy.

“Jerry--this is amazing-- I was just about to call you.”

“You were?”

“You haven’t been getting my texts have you?”

“To be honest, I haven’t been checking texts on my personal phone for a while.I’m really not going to Pittsburgh these days.”

“But, you do go to Miami sometimes.”

“Well, yes ... but I’m trying to stay away from the hobby these days.”

“Really? I hope it doesn’t have anything to do with Chorus Line.”

“Actually, it does a little, but nothing to do with you or anything you did.”

“That’s good to know. I really am sorry that things got so crazy, but I had a great time. I was just sorry to lose a favorite client and a star contractor due to the mixup.”

Something fluttered inside at the mention of star contractor. “Oh!”

“Jerry, I saw the way you were looking at one another and I know things didn’t work out. Emily’s not working with us anymore, but she’s still a good friend.”

“Is she okay?”

“She’s fine ... really.”

“Glad to hear it.”

“Honestly, Jerry. I think Emily will be even more okay once she knows that you’ve moved on.”

“Sure, sure. Same here, of course.”

We chatted about little of consequence for a few more minutes until Darcy’s voice tone lowered, “Jerry, this conversation is getting a little awkward. Actually, Emily and I have been seeing each other. I’m trying to get her to come to New York with me.”

My throat constricted as I felt as if Darcy had just kicked me in the stomach with the news.

“Does that mean you’ve both gotten offers?”

“Well, I have; I’m sure Emily will get her share once she’s gotten a few auditions.”

“You’re both so talented.”

“Well, I’ve got to give it a try, but don’t worry I’ll still be doing this, at least the setting up side of things. We’ve got to pay the rent somehow. New York’s a much better market for it.”

“I’m glad we got a chance to catch up.”

“Hold on Jerry! I’m trying to help out here, really.”

“Thanks, but I’m fine.”

“Do you remember that project Tabby asked me to help you with?”

“Project?”

“I was supposed to help you find a bad girl who’s ready to settle down. I wasn’t texting you about regular business.”

“Darcy, I appreciate it, but it’s just not something I can think about right now.”

She must have heard the hesitation in my voice.

“How about I text you Stella’s number? It’ll be up to you from there. I’m not going to send photos or tell you anything about her. I think you can trust Tabby and me on that sort of thing.”

“No doubt about that one ... Darcy, I wish the two of you all success on Broadway.”

“Jerry, one more thing.”

“What’s that?”

Darcy cleared her throat. “Why did you call?”

“Well, I...”

“You’re the one who called me. If you weren’t calling about a companion or about the matchmaking, why did you call?”

“I just sort of wanted to talk.”

“Did you maybe call, because you wanted to ask about Emily?” Darcy caught my half lie.

A lightning bolt of embarrassment shot through me.

“Jerry, if you do what I do long enough, you can figure out what guys are thinking, especially when it’s on the phone. Tabby used to tell me that the key to the business is that most men are afraid to ask for what they want.”

“It just feels so pathetic,” I murmured.

“I’m not sure there’s anything pathetic about a middle-aged guy getting a twenty-something who looks like Emily that hot for him.”

“I feel like I can’t talk to her right now, but I wanted to make sure that she’s okay. You were the only person I could ask.”

“I thought Emily was friends with your daughter.”

“Ouch!”

“Honestly Jerry, she doesn’t talk about it at all. I wish she would. In my experience crushes are always harder to get over than actual relationships.”

For about a day, I hated Darcy.

Two weeks later, I found myself in Miami for business. After a security issue shut our project down one afternoon, I went back to my hotel on South Beach and decided to go watch the sunset. Instead of watching the sunset, I and--I suspect--most of the other men at the beach found themselves watching a pale-skinned woman in a white bikini.

There are lots of gorgeous women on South Beach. It may have the highest density of hot bodies on any patch of sand in the world. There are summer days when you can look in virtually any direction and find yourself staring at female sights more mesmerizing than the ocean or any beachfront hotel. Still, there are certain women who stand out in more memorable ways. This woman had the usual long legs, flat stomach, silky hair, and full --in this case very full-- bust. There are any number of actress models in the area who have those attributes, but this woman carried herself so unselfconsciously she clearly had ‘it’, that mysterious thing some women have that make them the center of all male attention and all female jealousy. It was easy to think she was close to six feet tall, but I noticed that she could be no taller than 5’5”. I’m sure she was well aware that dozens of men were looking at her, but she simply didn’t seem to care. Perhaps, most surprising of all, she was by herself. She was looking to put her beach towel on a bare portion of the beach, and -- fascinatingly enough-- the sea of people around her parted as if all those beachgoers wanted to make sure she would settle in near them. I was lucky enough to be about twenty feet away, close enough to steal glances without necessarily being all that obvious.

Beach babes often look very exciting from a distance until they either turn around or they take off a hat or glasses. That wasn’t the case with this lady. After she settled onto her towel, she took off her sunglasses to reveal a striking oval face with prominent cheekbones, wide lips, patrician nose, and wide deep set eyes. I could tell she wasn’t in her early twenties, but she couldn’t be over thirty. She was very much at the peak of her looks. One might think that men would have started approaching her, especially as she pulled out a tube of suntan lotion, but I’m convinced that lotion thing is mostly a movie cliche. She pulled back her long silky brown hair into a ponytail and secured it with a purple scrunchy and unhurriedly started applying lotion to her body. I pretended to read my Kindle as I surreptitiously enjoyed the scenery.

A few minutes later, I switched from Kindle to cell phone. I hadn’t thought about any woman other than Emily in this way for months. Maybe it was time for me to give Darcy’s friend a call? After all, fantasizing about unapproachable women wasn’t going to get me anywhere. I gathered up my most casual sounding self and dialed. The beautiful girl in the white bikini got up presumably to head towards the water. I heard the rings of my connected call, but was just about to hit pause to ogle her as she walked when she bent towards her rainbow-colored beach bag to extract her phone; she was getting a call just as I was making mine. I couldn’t help but stare at her tight yet rounded backside.

“Stella here.” Darcy’s friend had a wonderfully seductive British accent. For the first time in months, I forgot about Emily.

“Stella, my name is Jerry. I’m a friend of Darcy’s.” It sounded quite a bit lamer than I expected it to.

“Darcy from Pittsburgh?”

“Yes.”

“So, you’re the chap looking for a bad girl.”

At that moment, the beautiful girl who was on her own phone call turned in my direction. The combination of Stella’s “bad girl” comment and her look must have turned me bright red. The beautiful girl twenty feet from me put her phone on her hip between the string tie on her g-string bottoms and her skin. She removed her scrunchy and shook her hair out before pulling her phone back out. She seemed to be flirting with someone.

“Well, in a manner of speaking, but I’m really just looking to meet a new friend.”

“Such a pity then, are you sure?”

I was tongue tied. It was as if I’d totally forgotten how to flirt.

“Are you there? I hope I didn’t scare you off with what I just said. I’m always forgetting that British humor doesn’t always cross the pond well. American chaps shock so easily.”

“No, you just caught me a little off guard there. Darcy’s, um, introduced me to new friends before and she’s been a good judge of these things. I happened to be in Miami for a few days and was wondering if you’d like to have dinner some time.”

“Well, let me check here.”

The girl in the white bikini was touching the screen of her smartphone.

“If you’re busy, I definitely understand,” I murmured, offering her a way out.”

“Too busy for a free dinner at a posh restaurant. Don’t be silly! Would tonight work for you?”

“Should I send a car for you?”

“No need, I can meet you there if it’s in South Beach.”

I named a restaurant and a time.

“Well, give me some time to walk home and get dressed. I can’t exactly wear what I’m wearing now to a restaurant.”

“How do we recognize each other?” I asked.

“Mmmm ... there’s this new blue dress, I’ve been dying to wear. I’ll have that on with red heels and purse. It’s been ages since I had reason to look stylish. You shouldn’t have much trouble spotting me.”

This was one confident sounding girl. I hung up and headed for my hotel gym. The beautiful girl in the white bikini had put her cell phone away and gone back to sunbathing. I walked right by her. She sat up for a second just as I passed and I could have sworn she was looking back at me.

I hadn’t had that much energy for a weightlifting session in years. I now understood why some boxers wouldn’t let their fights have sex before a big bout. Whether my date with Stella worked out or not, it felt good to be back in the game after so many months. I sent Darcy a quick text to let her know that I’d contacted Stella. She sent back an animated Union Jack emoticon that flapped in the breeze then suddenly went taut. I decided to walk the mile to the restaurant.

At the restaurant, I immediately spotted a pair of long pale legs and red heels sticking out of one of the booths. A tight blue dress started mid shapely thigh and ended by barely covering a prominent pair of breasts. I cleared my throat, “Excuse me, are you Stella?”

“Oh my! This is a surprise.”

“What surprise?”

“You’re the perv from the beach this afternoon who was staring at me while pretending to be on a phone call.”

I turned bright red as I tried to think of some way to convince this gorgeous woman that I was in a business meeting all afternoon. There was no doubt that this was the woman in the white bikini from the beach. What were the chances? And now, I’d blown it by overindulging my inner voyeur.

Instead of getting up and leaving, Stella started to giggle. “I was hoping that was you. Would I wear a suit that small and not expect men to look?”

She jumped up, kissed me on the cheek, and whispered, “Did it occur to you I might have been looking back.”

“It never entered my mind that anyone so gorgeous would notice me. I just figured that you get approached by a dozen guys a day, especially on the beach. I’m not exactly ripped.”

“Women don’t necessarily look for the same things. You have a very kind-looking face.”

I’d been around beautiful women, but none had ever taken my breath away quite like this. Stella touched my forearm and I felt the little hairs there react. We sat down.

“So let me guess, you’re from...”

“Macon, Jawjah.”

Stella did a credible southern drawl. I had to laugh.

“Actually, my parents immigrated from North Italy and I grew up just outside Lancaster. I married an American I met when I was at university and he brought me to Miami. I loved the weather here and the beach.”

“How long were you married?”

“We separated three years ago, but haven’t been able to reach a property settlement. Not my choice really.”

“No kids?”

“Just a cat. I’ll get the cat, but we can’t agree about the beachfront condo. Right now, we’re alternating custody of the condo and the cat. I suspect it’s his way of trying to hold onto me.”

She asked about me and followed up with a few questions about Jodie and Cheryl. Somewhere in there, Stella confessed to being thirty-two. The time passed quickly and before we knew it, our waiter was asking if we wanted to see a dessert menu. Stella studied the menu for a minute, then told the waiter, “I’m afraid I’m not seeing what I have in mind, on the menu at least.”

She winked at me.

“Is there some other place you have in mind for dessert?”

“There is and it’s walking distance.”

I paid the bill, we got up, and Stella held her hand out for me to take. As we left the restaurant, I snuck a glance at her breasts. “They’re 34D,” she said.

“I guess you caught me gawking again,” I answered.

“I confess that I’m right proud of them, even if they did make me give up ballet.”

“Balance problems?”

“No, boy problems. My tits kept poking out of my leotard and I’d get hooted at on my way to and from class. I loved the attention more than I loved the discipline of doing ballet four times a week. I like that you’re looking. I’d cover them up, if I didn’t want them looked at.”

“Well, it’s great to be able to look without pretending to be reading a book on the beach.”

We’d walked several blocks and seemed to be headed away from most of the bars and restaurants. Since Stella was a local, I just assumed that she had some little neighborhood place in mind. It was a beautiful night in all ways and I wasn’t going to complain about walking about holding hands with the girl in the white bikini, who’d been little more than a distant object of lust a few hours ago.

“So, how long have you known Darcy,” she asked.

“A couple years actually.”

“She must be a good friend if she’s introduced you to other women before.”

Suddenly, we’d slipped into awkward territory. I’d assumed that Stella had once worked for Darcy and maybe retired. It now occured to me that they maybe knew one another from legitimate dance, as opposed to the kind done with firepoles. Still, Stella had made that joke about “looking for a really bad girl.”

“I guess she is.”

“So, how did the two of you happen to meet? I’m surprised you didn’t fancy her. Those sleek little blondes always seem to drive men wild. I must say, she’s quite lovely.”

“She’s definitely beautiful. It’s just been more or less a friendship.”

“More or less? Did you and Darcy ever date? Don’t worry, I’m not the jealous type at all. I’m sure she wouldn’t have introduced us, if anything were going on with you.”

“Sort of.”

“I’ve heard that she’s an unbelievable cocksucker.”

I coughed. “Oh my god! Did you just say that?”

I felt a hand touch my butt and squeeze.

“Aren’t you the shy one there, Jerry. Darcy didn’t say anything about that when she chatted you up.”

“Since we’re playing this game, did you work with Darcy?” I asked as I took Stella’s hand from my butt and held it again.

I wasn’t sure which answer I was hoping for.

“Do you really need to know? I’m not expecting you to have brought along an envelope filled with hundred dollar bills, if that’s what you’re wondering.”

Stella let go of my hand in the process.

“Oh god, I’m really sorry. This is so awkward. I didn’t mean to offend you. We had such a lovely time at dinner and you’re so beautiful. I definitely wasn’t trying to suggest...”

My prospects for the evening were melting like ice in the middle of a Miami summer.

“I’m not offended, Jerry. Relax! I was good at it, great even. Why should I be embarrassed about being a tart? I love sex. I needed tuition money, so I spent a few summers in America. I met my ex-husband and was able to retire. I love the idea that you’re okay with it. You are okay with it are you? Very few men actually are, at least very few of the good ones.”

“To be honest, I’m more than okay with it. Darcy obviously told you I have a thing for bad girls,” I confessed.

“So, can we get back to our date? What was it I was asking about Darcy again?”

“She’s pretty exceptional.”

“See, was that so hard to say?”

Stella took my hand again and moved in for a hug and kiss. I kissed her back, maneuvering her against a shop window as she pushed against me. My erection pushed against my slacks.

“Mmmm, I think my dessert might be ready,” Stella whispered.

A few minutes, several kisses, and exchanges of tongues later, we were at the front door of Stella’s condo. As South Beach condos sometimes are, her place was rather ordinary from the outside, a building from the sixties that had maybe been painted a couple times since prices in the area skyrocketed, but otherwise unchanged. Once inside though, the story changed. The floors were marble. A fifteen foot high wall of of windows somehow had a view of the water even though the building was a couple blocks off the beach. The furniture was ultra-modern, stainless steel and leather. To be honest, it looked a bit like a porn set, except for the grey cat that came out to rub against Stella’s ankles.

“Wow, I understand why neither of you wants to give this place up,” I said.

“I do love it. Believe it or not, we bought it from a friend of Darcy’s.”

“Really.”

“Lovely lady who moved to California. She fell in love with some bloke there. From the looks of things, I suspect she had some pretty wild times between these four walls. You could see it in Tabby’s smile.”

I did my best to say nothing. Stella must have read my eyes. “So, you’ve been with her too. Jerry, you definitely get around and I must say, you seem to have excellent taste.”

“Actually, Tabby introduced me to Darcy. I had no idea she had a place in Florida.”

“There was a gent who was basically keeping her. The condo was part of their deal.”

There was a huge amount I didn’t know about Tabby. How could I have proposed marriage to a woman I didn’t really know?

“You found all this out at a real estate closing?”

“Something about this turns you on though, doesn’t it Jerry?”