Chapter 16

Janice braced herself for whatever might lie on the other side of her front door. Anger? Resentment? Indifference? She was ready for most anything, except what she got. She opened the door, and no sooner had she set two feet into the house she heard, "Mommy S!"

Lizzie came running to Janice, from where Janice hadn't even seen, and threw her arms around her and hugged her very tightly.

"Mrs. S! Mommy S! Are you O.K.? We were soooo worried about you! I'm so, so sorry. I'm the one who sent those pictures of us. I shouldn't have done that. Can you forgive me?"

Lizzie blurted everything out in rapid fire while still clutching Janice. Janice had no clue how to respond, other than to return Lizzie's embrace and pat her back. Then came another exclamation.

"Mom!" Alexa said when she saw Janice had returned.

She then ran up to her mother and Lizzie and threw her arms around both of them.

"Mom, please forgive us. I was just really pissed. I hope sending those pictures didn't upset you too much! I'm so sorry!"

Janice was overwhelmed by this greeting from both girls. As she was trying to steady herself to keep the entire group hug from falling over, she saw Nate enter the room. In his typical fashion, he just stood in the doorway with a calm smile on his face. Since she was being squeezed too tightly to speak, Janice just gave a small wave to her husband with the arm that wasn't pinned by the girls' hugs.

"Hi, Jan," Nate said.

"Hi," she replied when the girls finally released their death grip.

Nate and Janice just looked at each other, then Nate crossed the room to where she was. She returned his smile and they hugged.

"Jan, I'm so sorry. I didn't..."

"Nate, I'm the one that's sorry. I know that what happened wasn't your fault. If anything, I pushed you to it."

"Jan, thank you. But I won't let you take on all that responsibility. I'm sorry for my part too."

"Mrs. S?" Lizzie said tentatively.

"What Honey?" Jan replied.

"Do you ... do you think this whole thing is my fault?"

"Lizzie, Sweetheart no. We love you so much. I know you would never do anything to hurt our family."

"That's what I told her," Nate said.

"Lizzie, from what I understand, you came here looking for Lex, or me, and Nate happened to be here. You didn't plan that. The circumstances just played out the way they did. We all could have done some things differently, for sure. For sure. But we all love each other. So Lizzie, I don't think any such thing."

"Thank you!" Lizzie said through tears that had just appeared in her big eyes.

She grabbed Janice for another crushing hug. When Lizzie let go, it was Alexa's turn.

"Mom, I kinda have to ask the same thing. Do you blame me for any of this?"

"Alexa, thank you for asking. But no, of course not. I think we should leave it as nobody's fault, or if there's another option, everybody's fault. Unless anyone thinks differently."

The four of them stood and looked at one another. No one seemed to disagree. Nor was anyone sure what to say or do next. Nate finally asked the question they were all thinking.

"Now what?"

More stares were exchanged until Janice spoke.

"Here's what I think we should do. Lizzie, We all love you dearly. There are no hard feelings at all. But I'd like to have some time alone with Nate and Alexa, just to be together and talk about everything. Is that cool with you?"

"Oh totally, Mommy S," Lizzie said. "I totally understand. I'm gonna go home and crash and we can connect later, O.K. Alexa?"

"Sounds good Liz. I love you, Baby."

The girls exchanged a warm embrace, after which Lizzie hugged Nate and Janice as well before leaving and heading for home.

"How about we make a pot of coffee and just hang ourselves?" Nate proposed. "Damn! Hang-out, ourselves.

"Funny, Nate," Janice replied.

"Freudian slip, I swear!"

"Good one, Dad. I like the second idea better."

The three family members sat together in their family room for the next several hours, each one in their favorite comfortable chair. They talked through everything that had happened in the preceding days, some things being covered in more details than others.

They talked about the hows and whys of the various choices they each had made. They shared understanding and forgiveness. They all reconnected as a family that loved one another.

And, they connected anew as a family that had entered an entirely new phase. While they didn't exactly map out a plan, Nate, Janice and Alexa all acknowledged the discovery of feelings and desires they hadn't expected to encounter, ever. Sexuality had suddenly become an aspect of their lives together, and there was no going back to the way things were.

While they knew they could not predict the future, what the 3 were able to do was agree to the highest level of honesty and openness they could achieve. No matter who had what desires, they would be careful to think not only about what (or whom) they wanted to pursue, but about how it might affect all of them as a family.

"I know you Guys have had sex, each of your own free will," Janice said at one point. "It was a shock for a while, but now that we're together and we've talked so much of this through, I want you to know that I understand, basically at least, how and why it happened."

"Thanks, Mom."

"Yeah, Jan. Thank you."

"You're welcome. Whatever happens with you guys, or any of us moving forward, I know we'll all do things as much as we can in a way that keeps our family intact."

"That's most important to me," Nate said.

"All for one, and one for all!" Alexa said with a smile.

"Here, here!" Jan replied. "Well, now that we're back on some kind of level ground, I really, really need to close my eyes for a while. I am exhausted."

"Me too," Alexa said. "I'm glad you suggested Lizzie take off for a while. I love her to death, but I needed some quiet time."

"I could do with a nap, myself," Nate said.

"How about if I join you?" Janice asked.

"Works for me," Nate replied. "I think I'm ready to be in bed with you, Honey."

"Um, would it be O.K. if I took a nap with you guys too, like I used to when I was little?"

"Alexa Sweetheart," Janice said, "that's the best idea I've heard all day. We'd love it."

The 3 went upstairs together and entered Nate and Janice's bedroom. Janice went to their king-size bed and pulled back the covers. Without question or comment, she began to remove her clothes. Nate and Alexa very nonchalantly followed suit.

In a minute Nate was in briefs and Jan and Alexa were in bra and panties. They looked at one another, and with a shrug and a smile they removed those things as well and climbed into bed together completely naked. Jan got in from her side, Alexa took the middle spot and Nate came in from his side. It took very little time for the trio to find comfy spots snuggled against each other, and soon after that they were all asleep.

Janice was the first to awaken, and when she opened her eyes she realized dusk was settling in. She lay silently and enjoyed the warmth she felt physically and emotionally from being so close to her husband and daughter. Alexa opened her eyes a few minutes later and turned toward her mother.

"Hi," Alexa whispered.

"Hi Baby," Janice replied.

"Guess we all fell asleep pretty fast."

"I'm not surprised. I'm glad you wanted to come into bed with us. Great idea."

"Thanks, Mom."

Janice brought her arm out from under the covers and gently stroked Alexa's hair with her hand.

"I love you, My Baby."

"I love you too, Mom. Are you really O.K. with all this?"

"I think so. Us all being together and talking helped a lot."

"I agree."

"So, I was wondering," Jan whispered, "do you have any idea what things will be like with you and Dad now?"

"You mean, now that we've had sex?"

"Uh, duh! Yes, wise-ass! Now that you've had sex!"

"I'm not sure, Mom."

"Do you think you're gonna continue?"

"You're sure you're O.K. with talking about this, Mom?"

"Yes, Sweetheart. I'm just asking ... just curious, I swear."

"O.K. Well, we haven't discussed it. Haven't had a chance, really. Truth is, Mom, I never, ever dreamed any of this would be happening. I know you didn't either. But now that it has, I ... well, I liked it. All of it. So yeah, as much as any of it's up to me, I want more."

"Thanks for being honest."

"That's what we all agreed to a little while ago, right, Mom?"

"You got it, Kid."

"I am curious about something though," Alexa said softly.

"What's that, Honey?" Janice asked.

"How did you feel when you found out ... that Dad and I had gone to that level?"

"Since we're being honest, when I found out that Dad had gone to the step of doing anything with you, I really saw red. That's when I left. Like I've told you and him both, I pretty much totally understood the whole thing with Lizzie. But when I realized you were involved, it was hard to take. But then..."

"What, Mom? What then?"

"Well, there was something I didn't really say while we were all talking downstairs. I wasn't trying to hide it, but the time didn't feel right."

"What is, Mom? Tell me."

"I cycled through a bunch of emotions pretty quickly. But once I had calmed down a little, I ended up ... Ugh, this is a hard one. I guess it shouldn't be at this point. Well Alexa, when I thought about you and Dad making love, in the context of all the things that have bubbled up, I ended up being really, really turned on by it."

"You did? Seriously? No, you definitely didn't say that before."

"Well, it's the truth."

"That's wild Mom. Um ... I'm glad, really. I mean, it seems cool."

"I'm glad you think so. And you know what else, Lex?"

"What, Mom?"

"I think I want to see it."

"You want to see what? What do you mean?"

"I mean, I want to see you ... and your dad ... together. I want to witness it. I want ... I want to watch you."

In the gradually dimming natural light, Janice could see her daughter's eyes get wide and her mouth drop open.

"You do?"

"Only if you both want me to, of course. But yeah, I think I want to witness it. I think I can handle it now. What do you think?"

"I think it would be perfect, Mom. I'd really rather that not be kept totally separate from you."

"What do you think Dad would say about it?"

"You know him. Of course he would think it was great."

"That's what I think too."

Mother and daughter stared at one another in the dimming light and smiled. Alexa leaned toward Janice seeking the first kiss they ever shared that was not just a normal kiss between a mother and a daughter.

"You're too much, Mom. Too fucking much."

Janice moved toward her daughter, and their lips met in a soft, beautiful kiss that lingered.

"Wow," Janice whispered.

"Did you like that, Mom?" Alexa whispered back.

"Oh yeah. I could feel it down below."

"Really? Me too. Can I feel it down below, Mom?"

Alexa slid her hand down her mother's side to her hip, then her thigh, then brought it to the front of her body several inches below her navel.

"Lex, I want you to touch me there, a lot. But right now..."

"What is it, Mom?"

"I'm kind of sore below the equator. I think I need a day to recover before having any real activity in that area."