Chapter 11

I had to do something. I needed a plan. Thank God I had the whole weekend to try to figure something out. I ate what I could from the leftovers Mark and the children had left. I couldn't eat that much, I was under a lot of stress and my special diet at Sheila's had curbed my appetite. I went up for a shower and noticed my slightly trimmed down figure. "Another silver lining," I thought. I stood in the shower for an hour. As my thoughts returned to the events of the past week I felt a familiar tingle in my groin. I lifted the hand held shower head off the clip and put it between my legs. I needed to cum. "My God, girl, haven't you had enough sex these past three days," I said to myself. The pulsating jets of hot water against my clit and the mental images of spreading my legs and masturbating in front of other people had me trembling all over. I reached orgasm again and again.

I was supposed to mow my lawn in my bikini. I wondered if Sheila would really spy on me to see that I had obeyed her orders. But I wasn't about to risk exposing my children to ridicule on the chance that a neighbor kid would see me and spread the word around. I decided to take a chance realizing that if Sheila did find out I would be in for another paddling. "Hell," I thought, "if not that she'd find some other excuse to inflict the punishment."

So, I donned an old pair of sweats and mowed the damn lawn. Once inside again, I stripped naked. Truth be told, I was rather enjoying being about the house in the altogether. Being naked and fantasizing about what it would have been like to be fully aware of what I was doing when all those pictures were taken had me in a constant state of arousal and I fingered myself to climax more often that weekend than I had done my whole life.

By the time I slipped into bed Saturday night I had begun to relax a little. I knew what had caused my behavior and began to see a possible way out of the mess I was in. I needed to acquire some things so I decided that I would go to the mall Sunday. As I lay there planning my mind flashed on my last trip to a mall and the blow job I had given that stranger. It was my only "snack" as Sheila had ordeed. "Tomorrow, " I thought "I'll get some real food for lunch. But that doesn't necessarily rule out a blow job if there's a good looking guy around... " I realized then that something had been awakened in me that was exciting and I actually found that a part of me was looking forward to what new adventures awaited me when I returned to my duties at the Winters'. I drifted off to sleep mulling over my conflicted feelings, the excitement of new sexual experiences versus the humiliation and physical pain that the Winters delighted in putting me through.

Sunday morning's breakfast was light. I decided to take advantage of my new "diet" and exercise program and trim down a bit more. As I dressed for my shopping trip I was fairly sure that Sheila's spies, if she had any, weren't going to be anywhere around so I could dress any way I liked ... I put a casual skirt that came to just below my knees over panty hose. The top was a buttoned blouse over a standard bra. I looked in the mirror. I saw the old me. "Oh, what the hell, Charlene, the other way was more fun." So the pantyhose came off and the longer skirt was replaced by one that came down to mid thigh. I chucked the bra back into the drawer and left the top three buttons of the blouse open. Satisfied with my new look and feel I headed off to the mall.