Chapter 4: 2008 Miami

I quickly settled into my new life in Miami. There was no choice. We had a million things to do and my partner and I each worked more than one hundred hours a week for the next six months. And we got lucky. Hey, we didn't become millionaires or anything overnight but within months we knew it was going to work. That it might take some time but we'd found a little Internet niche that could make us some money. And if we played our cards right, if we worked our tails off, that we just might make a bundle.

I didn't date that first year I was in Miami. 'Too busy, too much work to do', I'd always answer whenever my partner prodded me to go out with him and his girlfriend. Or when he suggested an after work visit to a strip club.

Dad and mom came down to Florida for a four week winter vacation in February. The longest vacation dad had taken in forty years. Whenever I got together with them when they were down in Florida he'd grumble about missing work, that he was just wasting valuable time.

But, after a good meal and a couple of drinks, he couldn't stop himself from describing the fish he'd hooked that morning, or the putt he'd made for birdie on the fifteenth hole, or the day trip up to Gulfstream to wager on the ponies.

Who was this guy? This was my father? He even said, a couple of nights before they were to go back home, and yes, granted, it was after five or six beers, that if I hadn't left the company he just might be able to take vacations like this every year.

"We could take them anyway," my mother piped in with that night.

"Well," dad grumbled, never the greatest at conceding anything.

"We could buy a house down here and stay six months every year."

"Am I made of money? And who'd run the company? And--" My dad had never been an easy sell.

Adam managed to get down to Miami every six weeks or so. He had both customers and suppliers down here and my presence was just a further inducement to come. And nothing had changed in our relationship. He was still my brother. I still loved him. We went to Heat games and Panther games. Drank pints late into the night. He kept me up to date with Caitlyn's pregnancy.

Somehow, when I was with him, I was able to completely suppress the reality of what I'd done to his wife. Somebody else had done it. He was still my best friend. But the second he was gone the reality of what I'd done to him would reappear like a dark cloud in my mind. I knew it was just a matter of time before he'd learn the truth of his little brother's treacherous actions. Then what?

My niece was born on July 28th 2008. Eight pounds four ounces. Sophie Angela Montgomery. Adam e-mailed me her picture and her name about seven minutes after his daughter appeared in the world. With that name I knew that eventually she'd be nicknamed Sam.

My daughter Sam. She was beautiful. Fuck me! She'd never know who her father was. And if she ever did just how fucked up would that be?

It was ten days before Christmas. I was working late again. Just after nine-thirty my office phone rang.

"SW Incorporated, Dave Montgomery here," I said automatically into the phone.

"Hi." That's all. One 'hi' and I was struck dumb and for seconds held the cell phone away from my ear and just stared at it.

"It's Caitlyn." A shy, almost timid whisper announced down the line. As if I didn't know. A voice I hadn't heard in more than a year. I wanted to hang up.

"Are you there? Dave?"

"Yes," I finally whispered.

"Your mom says you aren't coming home for Christmas again this year."

"Can't ... busy," I mumbled. I had tears in my eyes.

"Your parents miss you ... Adam does too."

"I see Adam all the time ... Mom and dad will be down here again in a couple of months--"

"It's because of me isn't it?"

Of course it was. Having to face a woman I loved and raped in front of the only people I loved in the world. "It's better this way."

"Is it? For who? You haven't even seen Sophie yet." An accusation. A sad one. I didn't answer, what the fuck could I say?

"I've seen pictures--"

"Your mom, your dad, Adam, they all want you to come home. They don't understand why you haven't come to see your neice yet."

"And do you want me to?"

"It doesn't matter." Of course it did. But then she surprised me. "I want you to come anyway."