Chapter 3

I wanted to ask my dad for advice, but that seemed like a bad idea. Asking him how to make up with a girl after forgetting her name? He might start wondering why I'd been having sex with Candice in the first place.

"Flowers," Tiffany decided.

"Those azalea things?"

"Roses."

"Ouch!" I winced and tried to look over my shoulder.

"Hold still," she said. "I'm almost done."

"She really scratched me good, huh?"

"Ummm..."

"Never mind," I said. "I mean, she scratched me a lot."

"Yeah!" Tiffany said with a giggle. "I understand now. She scratched you good."

"Does it look bad?"

"They look like scratches. Why is she angry?"

"I told you," I sighed. "I don't know."

"Maybe when you tried to fuck her in the butt..."

"What? No!"

"Yeah," she agreed. "That wouldn't make me angry either."

"You can't get angry though."

"So, I'm not lying then." She shrugged. "Am I?"

"You can't lie either," I replied. "God! You're acting weird."

"I'm just trying to understand."

"Me too."

"So, if Candy isn't angry because you buttfucked her..."

"I didn't fuck her in the butt!"

"Hmph." Tiffany grinned at me. "I thought you did."

"I didn't."

"Well, maybe that's why she's mad."

"Huh?"

"You should give Candy a dozen roses and ask her to have anal sex."

"Right!" I laughed and then narrowed my eyes. "You're serious?"

"Why?" She smiled. "Does that sound strange?"

"Just a little."

"Oh."

"Are you sure you're okay?"

"Uh-huh! All done. Don't go swimming for an hour after you eat."

"What?" I grinned at her.

"What?" She grinned back.

"Nothing," I sighed, twisting my body in the mirror so I could see a half-dozen band-aids on my back.

"You have to write her a poem too."

"Says who?"

"I do." Tiffany giggled. "A love poem to express your deep regret and endless devotion."

"Uhhh ... That might be cool," I said slowly. "Do you know any good poems?"

"I know a lot of good poems, but none of them are yours."

"So?" I shrugged.

"I'll help you."

"It's gotta be a good one though," I said. "Not like some roses are red, violets are blue thing."

"I don't know that one," she said, stretching her naked body out on my bed as I lay down next to her.

She wanted to have sex, I knew that, but I wasn't in the mood for it just then. My balls were pretty empty anyway. I'd had sex with Tiffany twice as soon as I'd gotten home from school and then twice with Candy at her house. Four times in six hours was a lot, at least for me. I wasn't even sure I'd wake up with a boner the next morning!

But of course I did and that made me feel a little better. Tiffany too, since she was sucking on it. At least that part of my life seemed to be normal again.

"Candy?" I blinked at her. "What are you doing here?"

"I'm still your girlfriend," she said with a smile. "Right?"

"Yeah!" I nodded quickly. "You wanna come in?"

"Okay." She stepped into the foyer. "Where's Tiffany?"

"In the bathtub, I think," I replied, closing the front door behind her. "I thought your mom was having that thing tonight?"

"She is," Candy sighed. "I saw your mom and dad there."

"Oh, um ... You wanna take your jacket off?"

"Sure." She unzipped the pink leather jacket she wore and I'd never seen one that color before. It had the Chanel logo for a zipper tab though and I guess that explained it.

"Did you get the flowers?" I asked, knowing she had because Candy's mom had told my mom.

"Yeah," she said with a smile. "They were really nice."

"I tried calling you all week," I said. "I even went to your house."

"Four times." She giggled. "I know."

"Your maid hates me."

"Rosita?" Candy shrugged. "She hates everybody."

"You want something to drink? Um ... We got Coke or some juice..."

"No," she said, following me as I walked through the house. I really didn't know where we were going though.

"How long's your mom's party gonna last?"

"I dunno. Late probably. Is anybody else here?"

"Just Tiffany," I said. "We can hang out in the den, if you want."

"Can we go to your room?"

"Ummm..." I glanced at the stairs. "Tiffany might be in there."

"So?" Candy laughed. "Are you nervous?"

"Yeah," I admitted with a smile. "I haven't seen you in a week."

"You kinda deserved it."

"I didn't mean it."

"Let's go upstairs," she said. "We can talk up there."

"Talk?" I frowned at that, but then I caught Candy looking at me, so I smiled. "Great. Yeah."

She probably just wanted to talk about how angry she felt because I'd called her Tiffany by mistake. It reminded me of being in trouble with my dad and he'd call me into the den so we could talk. Actually, I rarely said much at all on those occasions, except to apologize. Maybe that had been the point, you know, to prepare me for having a girlfriend. He might as well have said, "Get used to saying you're sorry, son. You'll have a girlfriend someday."

"I'm sorry..." I started saying as soon as Candy sat down on my bed.

"Are these Tiffany's?" She picked up a silver thong that looked like it had been made of dental floss and a very small piece of aluminum foil, except it was soft.

"Uh, yeah." I nodded. "That's kinda all she wears. Thongs, I mean. And ... you know ... clothes."

I felt my face redden and Candy rolled her eyes.

"Anyway, um ... I'm sorry about what I said," I sighed. "I really love you, Candy, and..."

"You've gotta make up your mind," she cut me off.

"About what?"

"About her and me, for one thing," Candy said, making it sound obvious. "How am I supposed to compete with her?"

"I don't know," I said, but I didn't mean it the way it sounded.

"I know I'm not beautiful."

"Yeah you are."

"I'm not happy all the time and smiling like everything's perfect."

"Candy..."

"I'm just a girl."

"I know that," I said with a hard swallow.

"It isn't fair," she sighed, frowning and looking at her hands. "You're not supposed to love her."

"Tiffany's just..." I shrugged, frowning too as I didn't know what to say. "I can't help it."

"Why? Because she knows how to do sex stuff and I don't?"

"No, not like that."

"You want me to suck it?" she asked. "I'll do it if you want. I can try. You want to do other stuff? Just tell me."

"Candy..."

"I can be just as good as her."

"I didn't mean that," I said. "I love her differently, that's all. I don't love her more than you."

"I want you love me the way you love her though!" She wiped her eyes and I realized Candy had started crying. "You always look at her. You always talk about her and it's like you don't even love me!"

"I love you," I said, wanting to touch her but feeling afraid to try.

"I gotta go," she whispered, pushing herself up and then we both saw Tiffany standing naked in the doorway holding her towel.

"Candy, wait!" I reached for her, but she shrugged my hand off.

"I wish I was a robot," she said, pushing past Tiffany. "Maybe you'd love me too."

Candy left and I didn't even get off the bed.

"What happened?" Tiffany asked and I shrugged.

"I don't know," I said. "She seemed kind of happy at first and then ... She freaked out."

"Are you alright?"

"No," I decided with a sigh. "I think I broke her."

I felt broken too. My gut ached and I felt hollow inside. Empty. I loved both of them, but differently. I didn't look at Candy and feel the same way I did when I looked at Tiffany, but trying to describe those feelings seemed impossible. They don't make words like that. Tiffany was like ... air. Always there, you know? I needed her. She felt like a part of the world. A part of me. I loved her without thinking about it.

But Candy ... I loved her because she wasn't part of anything. I didn't have to go looking for air, but Candy was like something I had to catch in my heart and hold onto. She didn't belong to me and that made her special. I always felt like I had to be careful around her. She made me want to say the right things and not look stupid or do anything dumb. I expected Tiffany to like me, but I could only want Candy to like me and that's a huge difference.

I knew Candy still loved me, but she didn't like me anymore. I'd never thought being liked could be that important.

"Lie down ... Take these off..." Tiffany whispered, pushing me onto my back and undressing me.

Fresh from her bath, Tiffany's skin felt cool and damp and comforting as she covered my body with hers.

"Forget about her," she sighed, kissing my chest as her breasts rubbed against my stomach.

I played with her hair, darker now that it was wet, and pulled it from her face so I could see her brilliant eyes.

"She doesn't know what you need," Tiffany whispered, licking around my left nipple and then pinching it between her lips. "But I do, Josh. I'm going to take care of you now."

My cock had already grown stiff and it pressed against her soft tummy. She moved up and down slowly, straddling my legs on her knees. Her mouth moved to my other nipple, small and dark and so completely unlike hers. She teased me with her teeth, nipping my flesh until I shivered and she moved lower.

"You need to relax," Tiffany told me. "Forget about everything else. Just think about me."

"Yeah," I breathed, watching as she kissed my stomach and my swollen cock found itself wedged between her heavy tits.

She squeezed them together, trapping my penis as knelt over my shins. I tilted my feet towards the ceiling and caressed her butt with my toes. Tiffany moved her body slowly, smiling at me as my cock slid between her tits. Her skin felt soft as butter, like being wrapped in a pillow of cool flesh. Precum spilled from the tip of my penis and that only made it better as the shaft grew wet and slippery. She'd spit on my cock too, dropping her chin and letting the saliva fall from her pursed lips.

"I want to fuck you," I decided a few minutes later. "Lie down."

I pushed her shoulders and Tiffany let me go with a smile.

"No," I said. "On your stomach. Face down, okay? I want to fuck your ass."

"Oh!" Tiffany giggled, and I knew the possibility of saying no hadn't even crossed her mind.

"Yeah," I breathed. "Like this..."

She spread her legs slightly, as much as she could with my knees outside her thighs. We'd never done this before and I'd never wanted to. I wasn't even sure I wanted to do it just then, but I knew I could and that was the point. Candy wouldn't have let me do it, no way. She'd never even kissed my dick, but Tiffany wasn't going to complain. She'd let me push my cock in her virgin butt and tell me how good it felt, even if it didn't.

Her tight sphincter would resist at first and I'd grunt and groan, holding her perfectly round hips and driving my cock past that tiny ring. I'd stretch her asshole around me, bruising the soft muscles inside as they tried to push me back out. I'd have to fuck her hard, as hard as I could, and force her to take every last inch. She'd smile and push herself against me, riding my dick until I came inside her rectum with a rush of hot semen.

And then she'd giggle weakly, red faced and panting over her shoulder, and say, "That was really nice, Josh. I hope we do it that way a lot!"

I know because that's exactly how it happened.

"What happened to you?" Dad wondered as Tiffany walked gingerly into the kitchen.

Mom turned around from the cupboard to see what he meant. She pursed her lips and I felt my face grow warm as I reached for the pitcher of juice.

"Josh wanted to try anal sex last night," Tiffany replied. "I'm a little sore."

"Oh." Dad nodded and maybe he looked at me, maybe he didn't. "Hmph. Looks like it's New York and Kyoto in the Series again."

"Thank you for sharing that with us, Tiffany," Mom said and she was definitely looking at me.

"I hope Kyoto wins this time," I said, wanting to get off the subject of butt fucking my girl.

"You're welcome, Trish," Tiffany replied. "What would you like for breakfast this morning?"

"I'll fix it," Mom said. "Sit down at the table. I'll just scramble some eggs."

"Um!" Tiffany winced as she sat down and I caught Mom's smirk, but mostly I avoided her as much as I could.

That turned out to be even harder than I thought it would.

"I understand Candice has been a little upset lately," she said. "Do you know anything about that, Josh?"

"Uh, no..." I cleared my throat. "Not really."

"Hmph." Mom wore a doubtful look as she churned a bowl full of eggs with a fork. "Her mother thinks it might have something to do with you."

"Did you two have a fight?" Dad asked, looking over his paper.

"Not a fight," I said slowly. "She's just, um ... I don't know."

"She must have some reason for being upset," Mom said. "Candice didn't say anything to you last night?"

"Last night?" I swallowed hard.

"She came over, right?"

"Yeah." I nodded. "Just for a little bit."

"What did she say?" Dad asked.

"Nothing," I said. "We were just hanging out a little."

"Maybe I should ask Tiffany," Mom said and I felt like puking.

Tiffany would answer any question my mom asked, completely and honestly. She didn't have a choice because she didn't know how to lie and we all knew it. Asking Tiffany would be even better than strapping me into a lie detector and making me drink truth serum!

"I took a long bath last night," Tiffany said out of the blue. "I didn't get to speak with Candice."

"Oh." Mom froze for a second, probably not expecting that.

I felt like a firing squad had missed me completely and I stared at Tiffany as she gave me a small smile.

"Well, Josh..." Dad said as he folded his paper. "If you need to talk about this, you don't have to be shy."

"I know."

"It's not easy having a girlfriend," he continued. "We just want to know what's going on and make sure you're okay."

"I'm alright, Dad," I told him. "I want to talk to her first, you know? We're gonna be okay."

"Good." He looked at Mom and she wasn't happy about it, but only because she did worry about things. Especially me.

"You should have told them," Tiffany said as she got me into the chair and off to school.

"Why did you say that?" I asked. "About the bath and not talking to her?"

"I didn't lie." She kissed me lightly. "I didn't want to see you get hurt."

"I love you," I told her. "You know that, right?"

"I know," she whispered and then made a face as she stood up straight.

"And, um ... I'm sorry about, uh ... You know ... Fucking you in the butt."

"You don't have to be. I liked it a lot." Tiffany gave me kiss. "Have fun at school."

When I got back home that afternoon, I found a message stuck to the refrigerator with a smiley face magnet. "Meet me at the old playground. Come alone!" it read, with an exclamation point and everything. She hadn't signed it, but she didn't have to either.

I looked around at the brightly colored merry-go-round, teeter-totters, and swings. There was a twisty slide too and it all looked brand new. The city kept it nice and clean, the grass mowed and hedges trimmed and all that. I bet it had to be the nicest park in Seattle, but nobody ever used it for anything except walking their dogs, which was illegal according to the No Pets Allowed signs.

"Why did you want to meet me here?" I wondered.

"I like it here," Candy shrugged. "It's like my secret place."

She sat on one of the swings wearing a purple dress that almost dragged on the ground. It was kind of a grey day, like they usually are in Seattle. The wind blew the skirt around her bare legs and tousled her dirty blonde hair. Candy tilted her head and let it blow out of her eyes as she looked at me. She pushed against the grass with her sandals and swung gently back and forth.

"Give me a push," she said.

"Okay." I touched her back and felt my heart getting too big for my chest.

"I'm sorry about last night," Candy told me, straightening her legs as she went up, curling them as she came down. "I didn't want to get mad at you."

"It's okay," I offered carefully. "I just couldn't think of anything to say."

"What do you mean?"

"I don't know how to tell you how much I love you," I said, closing my eyes and thinking I shouldn't have said that. It sounded kind of dumb, even though it was totally true.

"Why not?" Candy asked and that stumped me, but I'd been stumped ever since I'd met her. It's one of the reasons I loved her.

"Ummm..." I gave her another push. "Because they don't make words that big."

"Heh!" Candy looked over her shoulder and grinned.

"I'm serious," I said with a frown, because maybe she didn't believe me.

"I love you."

"Really?" I blinked at her as she put her feet down. "I mean, I love you too."

"I know," she said.

I grabbed the chains to help her stop, moving around so I wasn't behind her anymore. I stood in front of her, looking down into Candy's eyes and relieved to see nothing but warmth in them.

"I'm pregnant."

"What?" I blinked at her.

"I'm almost a week late," she said and I narrowed my eyes. "My period, you know? I didn't get it this time."

"But..." I had to sit down and I sort of fell onto the swing next to her, both of us twisting the chains so we could look at each other.

"We're going to have a baby, Josh," she said, smiling and biting her bottom lip and almost making it sound like good news.

"You can't!" I said. "We can't! I mean ... We didn't do it that much!"

"We did it every day for a week," she reminded me. "The first time we did it, probably. It kind of felt like it maybe."

"God! My mom's gonna kill me!"

"I guess that's why I'm so moody or whatever," Candy sighed. "Like last night. I wanted to tell you, but then I just got mad and ... I'm sorry."

"We gotta, um..." I shook my head and my brain wouldn't sit still long enough to think. "My mom's got pills!"

"What?"

"Those morning after pills. You could take one and..."

"I got pregnant three weeks ago, Josh!" She giggled softly. "There's no pill for that."

"But ... Why didn't you do something? I mean, you could have gotten some pills before, right?"

"Why didn't you use a condom?" she asked, arching her eyebrows and I frowned at that.

"It's your body though!"

"Grow up! You put the baby inside me, Josh!"

"I know, but..."

"It's not all my fault."

I didn't say anything because she was right, but still ... Candy should have said something before. Like that first time; she could have stopped me. She could have told me to use a rubber or something. She hadn't even told me to pull out! I'd been fucking Tiffany for two and a half years and she couldn't get pregnant, so why would I even think about it? Maybe it wasn't all Candy's fault, but it wasn't all mine either.

"What are you going to do?" I finally asked.

"What do you mean?" Candy looked at me. "I'm gonna have a baby."

"I mean, like ... an abortion?" I asked slowly. "You could get one of those."

"Do you really want me to kill your baby?" she asked and something in her eyes told me I'd just screwed up, or was very close to it.

"No." I shook my head. "I'm just asking, um ... What do you think about it?"

"I think abortion is murder."

"Oh."

"Don't you?"

"Well..." I cleared my throat. "I guess so. I never really, um ... Yeah. It's bad."

"Alright." Candy actually smiled. "Good. I kinda wondered what you'd say."

"Uh, me too." I smiled back, but inside I really didn't know what I thought of abortion. It sorta sounded like a good idea just then.

"I'll have to tell my mom pretty soon," she said. "She already knows I didn't get my period."

"Did she say anything?"

"No." Candy shook her head. "She will though."

"Okay, um..." I nodded slowly.

"She thinks I'm a virgin."

"She does?"

"Yeah," she said with a giggle. "I told her we didn't do anything except kiss."

"Is she gonna be mad?"

"Oh yeah," Candy said and just a little doubt would have sounded pretty good, but there wasn't any.

"She's gonna kill me too," I sighed.

I couldn't believe she wasn't freaking out. Heck, I couldn't believe I wasn't freaking out more than I was, but it might have been denial too. Like shock or something. Other people's girlfriend's got pregnant, not mine; everybody knows that!

"Um ... What about adoption?" I said, trying to think of something that would save my life. "You're only sixteen and..."

"I'll be almost seventeen by the time it's born," she said. "You'll be sixteen already."

"Yeah, that's what I mean," I said, thinking there was no way we could have a baby, even if we had one!

"No way!" Candy snorted. "I'm not gonna have a baby and give it to someone else, Josh."

"But I don't even have a job," I thought out loud, remembering all the stuff my parents had tried to tell me and how I'd ignored most of it.

"Like your dad's not rich?" She laughed and I frowned.

"He's not going to like it," I said, knowing the truth of that. He'd been upset for a lot of different reasons.

"The baby will stay with me and after we graduate..." Candy took a deep breath and smiled. "We'll just have to get married."

That's about the time it started raining. An ice cold autumn drizzle of the sort Seattle is famous for and it probably wouldn't stop for nine months. Seriously. The irony wasn't entirely lost on me either, but I wasn't in much of a mood to appreciate God's sense of humor just then.

"What?" I blinked at her. "Married?"

"Come on!" Candy jumped up with a giggle and started running towards a big yellow and orange plastic tree house.

It didn't sit in a tree though, but on the ground beneath a huge oak tree. It had plastic decorations shaped like candy and a small door perfect for little kids. Small windows too and nothing inside but some twigs and leaves, and some initials carved into the walls. The place had a roof anyway and we crawled inside and even though sex should have been the last thing on my mind, watching Candy's butt wiggle in front of me started making my dick hard. I hated being fifteen sometimes.

"It's getting kind of cold," she said, rubbing her bare arms. "It was nice out before."

"Yeah," I agreed, taking off my flannel shirt and putting it over Candy's shoulders. I had a t-shirt on underneath anyway.

"Thanks." She smiled at me and I put my arm around her without really thinking about it.

She leaned into me with her knees drawn up to her breasts and her dress falling between her bare thighs to puddle around her butt. We hadn't gotten terribly wet and the rain started coming down a little harder, hitting the tree and dripping off the red and brown leaves to plunk on the plastic roof. I wanted to ask her about that getting married thing, but I wasn't sure I wanted to bring the subject up.

"We could be here for awhile," Candy said, giving me a funny look and I smiled at her.

"What's the matter?" I asked.

"Do you wanna touch it?"

"Touch what?"

"My tummy," she whispered. "You can't feel anything yet, but..."

She'd already started unbuttoning her dress and there were a dozen or more buttons in the front. They were white and shaped like tiny daisies and I watched Candy's fingers undo them one by one, exposing her bra and pale skin. I knew she wanted me to touch her flat stomach, but when I kissed her, my hand went to her tits instead. She opened her mouth for my tongue and I felt the texture of her bra and the warmth of her body beneath my fingers as I squeezed her left breast.

She looked beautiful and it hadn't sunk in yet that I'd put a baby inside her. I knew it intellectually, but it seemed so abstract. I didn't feel anything emotionally yet, at least not about that. I tried to imagine how I should feel, but there wasn't any excitement or resentment, no joy or anger. Nothing. I only felt a desire for Candy, to kiss her and touch her all over. To caress her body and lick her skin.

Candy's hand found my cock immediately, rubbing the lump in my pants while we kissed. She'd been angry with me for a long time and we were both going a little crazy trying to make-up. I pulled at her bra, tugging one of the straps off her shoulder as much as her dress would allow. Enough to get the cup under her breast and expose her rubbery nipple anyway, and I pinched and rolled it between my thumb and finger. I thought about her being pregnant and imagined Candy's tits fat with milk, getting bigger and heavier than they already were. I liked that idea a lot and I worked her other breast free as well, so that her tits fell over her scrunched up bra.

Her hands were busy too and she had my belt undone and my pants unbuttoned quickly. Candy got the zipper down and reached into my boxers to pull my cock loose. Her small hand wrapped around the shaft and she started to jerk me off while I sucked on her tongue. We were definitely going to fuck and I started pulling her dress up her hips blindly, looking for the bottom of the skirt and wondering how much dress there could be. There seemed to be more than I remembered, but I finally reached the end and pressed my hand between Candy's bare thighs to find her panty covered pussy.

I massaged her sex and Candy spread her legs for me, letting me feel the shape of her pussy through the cotton. She'd grown warm and wet down there and I pressed my finger against her slit, pushing her panties between her thin pussy lips. When I became impatient with that, she lifted her hips and butt, helping me pull her panties down so I could finger her naked sex while we made out. Candy kept stroking my cock too, getting her fingers wet with precum as it spilled from the tip and ran down the shaft. I pushed my middle finger inside her pussy and felt her amazingly hot inside. The soft walls felt like butter and I could feel the odd shape of her vagina, the curious bumps and ridges inside. I curled my finger and wiggled it, getting a soft moan and a jerk of her hips in reply.

When Candy straddled my hips with her knees, we were both ready for it. She held up her dress while I held my cock and rubbed it against her pussy. She let herself down and we fucked only as fast and hard as she wanted to. I could only hug her against me, stroking her back and kissing her tits while Candy moved up and down, riding my cock slowly at first. She'd take all of it and then grind her pussy down on my cock with a deep groan before lifting up and doing it again. We made love like that for five minutes before I had to fuck her hard right at the end.

I rolled us over and lay on top of her, holding her shoulders while I pumped my cock inside her pussy with short, rapid strokes. I kissed her mouth and filled Candy with my tongue just as my orgasm exploded inside her tight pussy. I had the weird thought that I was cumming inside my pregnant girlfriend. We were kissing while I lay on top of her tummy and she had a baby inside her. Just a tiny one, probably not even big enough to see without a microscope, but I knew it was there. My cock pulsed inside her, filling my girlfriend with cum, and we were kissing and she was pregnant and...

"We're gonna have a baby," I breathed, like I hadn't believed it until just that second ... and maybe I hadn't.

"Yeah," Candy whispered with a smile, looking pink and breathless and glowing it seemed to me. She looked so completely alive.

"I love you," I told her and that's really all I could say.

Candy and I were lying on my bed while Tiffany sat near my desk. She'd found some blank paper and a pencil, and she enjoyed doodling. She never really tried to draw anything, but she was a surprisingly good artist. She hadn't been programmed for that or anything either, at least not so far as I knew, and it gave her a distinctly human quality. I liked watching her doodle and I wished I knew how to tell Candy how I felt and make her understand that I sort of loved them equally, but in different ways.

"Tell me you love me," Candy sighed and she seemed to be in one of her moods. She blamed it on being pregnant, but I blamed it on the Jealous Gene.

"I love you," I said softly, knowing I wasn't betraying Tiffany at all, but it felt like it just because she was there.

"What?" Candy didn't smile. "Say it louder."

"I love you." I said with a hard swallow.

"You love me more than..." She arched her eyebrows. "Say it. Tell her. I want to hear you tell her."

"I love you more than Tiffany," I said, looking down at my hands.

"Did you hear that, Tiffany?"

"Uh-huh," she said with a smile. "He loves you more than he loves me."