Chapter 1

The question "What have I done?" flashed through my mind as I looked down at the body of my father sprawled on the straw—he still had the gun in his hand. My father had been trying to kill 'Thor, God of War', the horse that was presently going crazy beside me.

I had surprised Dad in the act of killing the prized jumper. I just managed to kick the gun up away from the horse but ... the gun still went off. The bullet had entered under his chin and exited through the top of his head, taking a large chunk of skull and the better part of his brain with it. Blood and brains spattered the ceiling, the walls, the horse, me, and everything else in the stall.

That thought lasted only a microsecond because the horse was going berserk with terror. Horses don't like loud noises or the smell of blood—and there certainly was a lot of blood. I reached for the animal's lead that was now free of my father's grip, as I called for help.

People began to arrive and after the initial shock managed to help me get the big gelding out of the stall. We needed to wash off the gore that had spattered on the animal and move it to another stall. Billy, the groom that cared for this particular horse was able to calm him down as I washed the blood off.

Once the horse was settled I sagged onto a nearby bale of hay and called Max my lead groom over, "Max, call the police for me, oh and have one of the lads close the door to Thor's stall and stand guard. No one is to go into that stall."

"But, Miss? What about your father?"

"He's dead, Max. Please, just do as I ask."

"Yes, Miss," said Max as he turned and barked orders to the gathering crowd.

"How the hell did we get here?" I thought.

My past began to flow through my mind like a river ... There were five of us, my Mom (Glory), Dad (Thomas), big sister (Peggy), big brother (Alex), and me (Lacie). We were rich, very rich. Not Rockefeller rich, but still up there on the social and financial registers.

Our money is old and so we don't flaunt it like those that have come into wealth in their own lifetime. No, we wear our wealth like an old flannel shirt, comfortably. However, we do expect certain things ... and, I guess, those expectations could be misconstrued as arrogance by some. Believe me when I say that that type of behavior is not intentional ... at least, not by me.

That said, my mother is from an old southern family and there are certain standards that she expects from her children, particularly the females. Women in our family are sent to finishing school before college. In fact we are packed off to certain prep/high schools that have deportment classes as a major part of the regular curriculum.

I think that my mother was worried about me very early on, as she didn't send me to the normal school that her family had attended for generations. Noooooo! She lobbied my father to send me to a school in Italy. It was an extremely strict school run by Nuns and women of royal birth. To his credit, Daddy resisted for a time, but she soon wore him down. By their behavior I think that she denied him his conjugal rights. My father, being a lusty man, conceded defeat. Ok, ok he's a horny old goat, and when she denied sex he caved like a house of cards.

Since there are rolling admissions at the school my mother picked I was packed off the very next month!

I HATED IT! I still hate it, to this very day.

That was my family's first big mistake! I'm NOT the boarding school type. NO WAY, NO HOW, PERIOD!

Up to that point I had been a sweet obedient member of the family, a tomboy yes, but still obedient. All that ended when they sent me away! I felt betrayed, abandoned, isolated... and that I was really flawed. Why else would I be exiled in such a way?

It's funny how life is. People do things to avoid problems, only to cause the very problem they are trying to avoid. That's what happened to us. It was a perfect example of the self-fulfilling prophecy.

Sending me to boarding school was a knife in my heart! That knife caused a permanent schism between me and my parents, and eventually my siblings. Over the four years that I was forced to endure the tyrannical teachers I became a sharp-mouthed, morose young woman capable of inflicting very precise poisonous barbs into the hearts of those that I didn't like. I, for some unknown reason, could see the weaknesses of people. I used that insight to inflict pain.

The shy, sweet girl was gone! I had become a brassy, hard, offensive young woman!

As tough as my mother was, I brought her to tears every time we were together. My sister just stopped talking to me, altogether. When I entered the room, Peggy would silently leave, with all of the dignity of a Queen leaving court.

The men of the family were just the opposite. We fought constantly.

My relationship with my family became so strained, that I returned to school in the middle of the summer vacation between my sophomore and junior years. After that I no longer returned home for any reason.

First it was my mother that got angry at my refusal to "help" the family climb the social ladder. As time went on my father began to really rage at me. I wasn't his 'little pet', anymore. "After all, it is your duty," he kept saying. Several times he even sent someone to fetch me, only to find I was not at school.

I had a friend from home send me the social calendar. I would leave school whenever there was an event that I even remotely suspected they 'needed' me to attend. I drove the Nuns crazy. They even tried to lock me up in a nun's cell, so that I would be at hand for one of the 'pick-ups'.

I destroyed that cell! I got out by making a hole in the wall!

I finally put Mother Superior in the hospital. She tried to cane me! I took her cane and used it ... on her! I guess you could say I put the fear of God into the old bitch. That was the day I left school, forever, to be on my own.

I never did let my family see the pain that they had caused me, though.

I'm not saying that I didn't have some good times during those years at school. I did. But those times were not at home or anywhere near my family, whom I now detested and considered my enemies. No, I developed some fine friendships at school, but not with other students. I had become very egalitarian during those four years, and it was the school support staff and the people of the town with whom I spent my time.

I did relent just prior to graduation, however. Graduation was scheduled in the middle of July, at the end of my senior year. Thinking that it had been a long time since I had seen any of my family and wishing to, sort of, offer an olive branch I called home.

When I told my parents of the date mom said, "Oh dear, there is a function that weekend and we quite simply can not miss it, Darling. You do understand don't you Sweetheart? If it wasn't your Graduation we would have you come home to attend with us."

Instantly my blood went to a boil and I slammed down the phone without another word. I refused to answer the phone though it immediately began to ring. Further, I told my roommate, Lucia Ricci that I would not be taking any calls from my family ever again.

"But what shall I tell them when they ring up again?"

"Tell them ... tell them that I said for them to go to HELL!"

"Oh, I couldn't do that," she said with alarm.

"Well then tell them whatever you like. Just keep me out of it."

Lucia was a sweet homely girl ... well, more plain than homely, really. She had few friends at school, even though she was very rich, and titled too boot. Like schools the world over there were the 'in' cliques. For all of her royal blood and money, Lucia was still on the outside looking in.

Since I was to turn eighteen the first week of July, just a few days hence, I already considered myself emancipated. Therefore, I decided to just leave school and travel, without informing anyone of my itinerary. If their charity/social functions were of more importance than the graduation of their own flesh and blood then screw them and the graduation!

I was young, healthy and strong. Plus, I had plenty of money. Each year my father sent me an allowance to the school bursar. But here's the thing, I didn't do any of the things my classmates did. I saved, while they spent. They went to the Alps skiing or to Paris and Rome to shop. All of their activities cost a great deal of money.

I, on the other hand, spent my free time in the local cafes and at friend's homes. Thus, I had amassed a considerable sum of money. As soon as the money arrived from home, I withdrew it from my school account, and placed it into traveler's checks that I hid in the lining of my raincoat.

I was good to go!

My last call home had been the last week in June, a little over two weeks before graduation. It was then that I decided that it was time to 'get out of Dodge.' I packed my bags that night. Lucia asked me what I was doing and I told her that I planned on bumming around Europe for the summer.

"But what about graduation?"

"What about it? I never wanted to come to this miserable school in the first place. Screw it!"

Lucia looked thoughtful for a couple of minutes. You know I'm not going to graduation either. I must be home for Il Palio."

"What's that?"

"Oh it is a most wonderful festival!" she said, lighting up with pride. "People come from all over the world to see it! There is a magnificent horse race and the Corteo Storico, where people dress in sixteenth century clothes and walk in a procession, and ... and then there is the throwing of the flags. Oh, oh and there is the mounted swordplay of a squad of Carabinierie. Lacie, it is all so wonderful!"

I stood in open-mouthed shock! Not at what Lucia said but at the transformation that took place in my roommate! She glowed with an inner light of pride. This was not the shy girl that hardly said a word! No, she not only was bubbly and animated, she became beautiful! I had never seen her so excited!

Lucia waxed eloquent for the rest of the evening about the festival. Finally she suggested that since I wanted to run away, why not run to Siena, to her home. She suggested that I leave a day or two before she was scheduled to leave. If I traveled by train and made a few stops to sightsee no one would suspect where I was bound. I would just be another young tourist.

Without a moments delay, I agreed. I agreed for two reasons. Firstly, it gave me a place to go. Secondly, I had to learn more of the enigma that was Lucia.

Mother Superior caught me as I was leaving that evening and attempted to stop me. She took a couple of swipes at me with her cane, that's when I put her in the hospital. I knew all too well that they would not call the police, for fear of scandal. It would cost them too much money. I didn't do any real damage, but I sure scared the piss out of the old bird, literally. I'm sure that they put her in the hospital just for my parent's benefit. They could milk more money out of them that way.

I left her lying on the floor, and walked out of the front door taking the cane with me.

It took me five days to get to Siena from Perugia, where the school was located. This was because I would get off the train whenever I saw something of interest and then board another train later. It was a lovely trip and I finally felt free!

I phoned Lucia whenever I stopped, so that I would not cause her any worry. When I finally did arrive in Siena, I found chaos. People were everywhere, and it was still two days before the festival. The place was a madhouse!

Fortunately, the Ricci family sent their car for me.

The family welcomed me with open arms. Lucia beamed with pleasure when I stepped into the great hall of their home. The place was what Americans picture in their mind's eye whenever they think of the homes of the Italian aristocracy. There were original paintings by the Masters hung on every wall and frescos on all of the ceilings.

The very building exuded class and a quality of timelessness. In my mind, I applied the personality of an old woman of high position and great dignity to the house. I picture the great house as a dowager Duchess in old black and white films. I don't know why, I just did. Once settled into the room that was to be mine during my stay, Lucia gave me the grand tour of the place. She was bubbling over with happiness and enthusiasm.

Palio di Siena ... or to be more accurate, the Palio di Provenzano ... was the first race of the season. It coincided with the local celebration honoring the Madonna of Provenzano and the Feast of the Visitation. It was everything that Lucia had said, and more ... much, much more. The people, a sea of them, just jammed the piazza, it looked like Times Square on New Year's Eve.

Mrs. Ricci surprised me the morning of the festivities with a marvelous sixteenth century medieval ceremonial gown, with all of the needed accoutrements.

I was to walk with the family in the procession!

They had listed me as a member of the family!

At first, I just stood there, awestruck. Then I did something girlie, girlie; something that I had never done in my entire life!

I screeched and jumped up and down with joy and excitement! These people, in just a few days, had treated me with more love and tenderness than my real family had ever done, for my entire life.

To me, the Riccis became my true family on that day!

The gown was made of the richest brocade that I had ever seen. The colors were so bright and vibrant as to hurt the eyes of the observer. There were seventeen city wards and each ward had their own set of colors. Lucia and her mom helped me with my hair and then into the unfamiliar clothes. We then made our way to the proper place for our ward and family.

After the procession came the horse race, with the riders wearing medieval garb and riding bareback on a track of trucked in dirt.

WHAT A RUSH! I was hooked on horse racing from that moment on.