Chapter 24

I sank down on my bed, stunned. What had gone wrong? Had I done something to make Kelly mad? Why would she break up with me? I was totally lost. I stared into space, desperately trying to understand what had just happened. I lay down on my bed, put on my ear buds and turned up my MP3 player. I tried to lose myself in music.

I desperately wanted to see Kelly in person so I could talk with her and find out what I had done to cause this shocking development to what I thought was an extremely happy relationship. I went over to the dining hall at 8:15 on Monday morning like the two of us always did. I searched the dining hall thoroughly but couldn't find Kelly. I sullenly ate my breakfast alone. Hopefully I could talk with Kelly before history started at 9:05.

I arrived at class early and hung out outside the classroom. Kelly didn't show for class. A minute before class started I went in and found a seat. I halfway paid attention to what Dr. Brennan was saying. How do I get Kelly to explain what in the hell is going on?

"Mr. Martin!" rang in my ear. I realized Dr. Brennan was standing by my desk addressing me.

"Yes, Doctor?" I replied, sitting up straight.

"Your term paper, Mr. Martin," Dr. Brennan said as she handed it to me.

"Thank you," I replied as I accepted my work. Dr. Brennan continued down the row passing out papers to the students in the class.

I looked over the cover sheet for my paper. An 'A+' in bright red Flair graced the cover. I read the note under the grade.

"Excellent work, Kyle. Please see me after class to arrange an appointment to discuss this paper further. Dr. K. Brennan."

I wondered why Dr. Brennan wanted to meet me after she finished grading my paper. I shrugged it off and listened as she continued handing out papers. I had an idea how to talk to Kelly when Dr. Brennan repeated, "Miss O'Keefe? Miss O'Keefe?" as she searched the room for Kelly.

"She's my girlfriend," I replied. "She's not feeling well today. Would you like me to deliver it to her when I see her at lunch?"

"That's fine, Mr. Martin," Dr. Brennan replied. "See me after class for the paper."

I tried to concentrate on Dr. Brennan's lecture, but it was hard. My mind wandered back to what would I say to Kelly and how would I get her to talk with me. What had I done to make her want to dump me? The hour passed slowly I struggled to make my mind pay attention to class.

I met Dr. Brennan at the front when class was dismissed. She greeted me warmly.

"That was an excellent paper, Mr. Martin," Dr. Brennan said. "I'd like to schedule an appointment with you to discuss your paper further."

"Is there a problem with my paper?" I asked.

"No ... no, no ... no problem at all," Dr. Brennan replied quickly. "Actually it is an exceptional paper for an undergraduate of uh..." She eyed me carefully for a second and added, " ... your age. That's what I wanted to discuss with you. I take it that you enjoy studying history."

"I love it," I answered. "I plan to be a history teacher when I finish school."

"Interesting," she replied, nodding approvingly. "I'd like to talk with you further about that."

Dr. Brennan and I compared schedules and agreed on Tuesday at 1:30 pm. Dr. Brennan allowed me to bring Kelly her term paper after I indicated that I had lunch every day with Kelly. I thanked Dr. Brennan and headed for my Econ class.

I thought about what I would say when I finally found Kelly. Kelly was acting so strange since I got back from Indiana. I was worried that she might refuse to talk to me like she did last night. I wanted to deliver her term paper. She'd have to talk with me if I had her paper. I wracked my brain trying to figure out what I had done to cause Kelly to be so upset with me that she would want to break up with me. I was at a total loss about why all of this was happening.

During Econ I decided to try to find Kelly immediately after her 11:15 philosophy class. I figured she had avoided history so she wouldn't have to see me. I went across campus and hung out near Electrical Engineering West for most of an hour, waiting for the 12:05 dismissal time of Kelly's class.

I was determined not to make the same mistake that Penny and I made when we first broke up in tenth grade or to make the mistake I made when I broke up with Penny last fall. What ever happened, the two of us were going to talk through whatever was wrong and come to a complete understanding before we split up. So help me God, I was going to see to that.

I waited fifteen minutes after dismissal time without seeing my girlfriend. I headed back across campus when I decided I must have missed her or she hadn't attended this class either. I went back to Pollock Dorms, pondering my next move. Poly Sci wasn't until 2:30, so I had plenty of time to track down Kelly.

I went to lunch, hoping I would find Kelly in the dining hall. No luck. I ate my lunch quickly. I decided it was time to be direct. I went straight to Beaver Hall and up to the third floor. I listened before I knocked at the door. I could hear someone was inside.

I knocked and stated, "Kelly, are you there? It's Kyle."

"I ... I ... can't see you," Kelly answered, sniffling as she replied. "Go away."

"Dr. Brennan handed out the term papers today," I explained. "I picked yours up for you."

"OK," Kelly answered weakly. She sniffled and unlocked the door. I stood back a little in the hallway. Kelly cracked the door open and peeked out. Her eyes were red and puffy. She obviously had been crying.

"What's wrong, honey?" I asked. She reached out for her term paper. I didn't give it to her. "I love you and don't want to lose you. If I've done something wrong, I'll fix it; whatever it may be."

"You?" Kelly asked. "It isn't you. You deserve better than me for a girlfriend."

I breathed a sigh of relief that I hadn't screwed up again. "What is it, honey? We promised each other that we would try to build a long lasting relationship. That is based on trust and communication. Please tell me what is wrong."

Kelly stared at me for a few seconds, sniffled and then held the door open for me. I went inside her room. "What is it, Kell?" I asked. "We'll work it out together, no matter what." I held my arms out to her. She melted into them, clutching me. I wrapped my arms around her and embraced her to my body. She trembled and sobbed as I held her. I cooed in "It's OK," in her ear as she cried.

Kelly got quiet after a couple minutes and simply clung to me. I asked, "What happened to get you so upset, honey? Please tell me."

Kelly pulled away a little and stared down at the floor. "I ... I ... was unfaithful."

Shock shot through my body. Unfaithful? Some guy with my Kelly? Thankfully my next thought was about how cruel I had been to Penny last fall when I assumed my own error had been unforgivable. I fought back my anger and decided to hear Kelly out. I took a deep breath and asked quietly, "What happened honey? You still love me don't you?"

"I do!" Kelly answered instantly. "I love you so much!"

I hugged her and held her tight to me. After a few seconds I asked, "How did this happen, Kelly?"

I let Kelly go. She sat down on her bed and patted the bed beside her, indicating I should sit down.

Kelly breathed deeply and began. "Alan took Jen out for dinner on Friday night. The bastard dumped her over dessert."

"I'm sorry to hear that," I said sympathetically.

"Jen is just destroyed about this," Kelly said. "She thought she and Alan had a future together – marriage, kids, the whole thing. His dumping her threw her completely."

"That's really too bad," I agreed. "What does that have to do with us?"

"I'm getting to that part," Kelly replied. "I wanted to get Jen out on Saturday night. I called Cam [Cameron Miller, who rooms next door to me in Hartranft Hall]. He invited Jen and me to Omega Chi's party on Saturday night. I thought getting out would help Jen forget about Alan."

"Did one of those frat bastards take advantage of you?" I asked, my anger rising again.

"No!" Kelly insisted. "The guys at the frat know better than to fool with your girlfriend. We enjoyed the music and the beer at the party. We danced a bit. All of the guys were proper gentlemen."

"OK, when did things go wrong if it wasn't at the frat party?" I asked.

"Jen and I had a lot to drink at the party. We were pretty wasted when we got back to our room. Jen started thinking about Alan again. I gave her a hug to comfort her and ... and things went further."

"What?" I asked. "You and Jen..."

"We started to kiss and ... and ... Jen played with my titties and..." Kelly explained.

"You got each other off?" I said. Kelly nodded yes. A wave of relief swept over me and I laughed – loud. Kelly stared at me, plainly shocked by the reaction. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't laugh. It's just that I was expecting it to be much worse. You and Jen got drunk and got each other off."

"But we ate each other's pussies," Kelly explained. "I thought you'd be upset with me having sex with someone else."

"Kelly, if getting off with a friend counts as cheating, Ed and I cheated all the time back at camp," I explained. "I whacked off nearly every night thinking of how much I missed you. I have no idea which of his dozen girls Ed was remembering each night."

"It isn't the same," Kelly countered. "You and Ed didn't do each other. You didn't put your hand on his cock and jerk him off. You didn't give him a blow job, did you?"

"NO!" I replied hastily. "Definitely not. You aren't planning to become a lesbian are you? You still like guys, right?"

"I definitely like guys, Kyle," Kelly answered.

"Good," I said. "That's settled. You're not going to go to bed with Jen again." Kelly nodded yes. "Heh ... heh ... heh ... not unless you plan to include me too," I teased.

"You're being bad now," Kelly replied.

"Hey, I'm a guy," I said. "Two girls making out makes me horny. What do you expect from me?" I opened my arms and offered Kelly a hug. We embraced and kissed. I could feel the tension drain from my girl as we showed our love to each other. We parted and stared into each other's eyes.

"Promise me this," I said. "We want this thing of ours to last. When we run into problems we have to talk things out. Don't assume we can't work out problems together. Can you promise me that, Kelly?"

"Yes, I promise, Kyle," Kelly said. "How did you get this smart?"

"I screwed up..." I replied. "A lot! Let me screw something up half a dozen times, eventually I figure it out."

"I'm glad you're the forgiving sort, Kyle," Kelly said. "I'm sooo lucky to have you."

"I'm lucky too," I said. "I have the greatest girl in the world. You ready for some lunch honey? I'm starving."

"Give me a minute to get cleaned up, Kyle," Kelly answered.

Kelly took a couple minutes to get her make up on and get ready for lunch. We headed to the dining hall together, my arm around her waist and Kelly's across my back. I felt like a million dollars after the past twenty-four hours of craziness.

Monday evening after Damian and I turned out the lights at bedtime I had time to reflect. A year or two ago I would have let my temper drive my response to Kelly's admission of infidelity. I would have yelled and stormed off, never waiting to hear what really happened. Maybe there was hope I could get my act together and display some of the maturity I admired in my older brother Will.

I had to chuckle when I remembered how Will, Mr. Cool, had reacted when Abby got drunk and went to bed with some guy back when they were freshmen. Will had made a complete mess of their relationship when he broke up with her in the aftermath. Had it really been five years ago? Will and Abby both were eighteen when it happened, a year younger than me now. I had handled things better, with more maturity, than Will had then. Maybe there was hope that I would turn into a decent, fully functional adult some day.

--oooOooo--

Things settled down between Kelly and me over the next few days. Kelly needed time to realize that I really wasn't upset about her comforting Jen the previous Saturday night. By mid-week it was like Sunday and Monday had never happened.

Tuesday afternoon I found excellent news posted outside the locker room on our bulletin board. The Big Ten had named me Offensive Player of the Week for my 351 yard performance and three touchdowns against Indiana. The Collegian, our student newspaper, did a feature article on me that day too. I got a lot of good natured ribbing from my teammates.

The doctors confirmed what most of us suspected on Saturday. Yasin Clark had blown out his ACL and MCL when he went down in the game. I spent some time after practice talking with him, letting him know my experiences from a few years ago. Yasin was a senior, so his football days were pretty much over. He would have been a stretch to make it in the NFL before his injury. He had no chance at all now. Yasin was philosophical about it – he'd take things as they came. I doubt I would have been quite as calm if the same thing happened to me.

The coaches worked us hard that week to prepare for our showdown with Michigan. The odds-makers installed us as even with Michigan, which surprised me. We had home field advantage and our offense had been playing absolutely lights-out this season. Michigan had suffered an embarrassing loss to an unranked BCS team and fell out of the top ten teams in the country.

Our three blowouts and our win over Indiana had only advanced us from #8 to #6 in the national polls. I didn't blame the pollsters for questioning our defense. It was unproven and we needed to figure pretty quickly how to replace Aaron, Antwaan and Pete if we wanted to have a shot at the BCS Championship.

Our practices were intense. Zack, Jake, Evan and Karol set the tone for the rest of us. Everyone put in some extra study time in addition to practicing hard to get ready for our game on Saturday afternoon.

Coach Burton called a group of players, including me, into his office after Tuesday's practice to discuss this week's visiting recruits. Chip Brinton and Yasin Clark were assigned primary responsibility for showing the visitors around campus and sitting with them during the game. Trevor Conwell, Zack Hayes, Shawn Byrd and I would assist them when we weren't busy with our pre-game preparations. Obviously I was part of the group guiding them to help convince my brother to join me at Penn State.

Our prospects this week included a quarterback, a wide receiver, two defensive backs, a defensive lineman and a tight end. The duties were becoming routine – meet and greet them and their parents Saturday morning, show them around the locker room before the game, and then turn them over to Chip and Yasin while we prepared for and played our game.

When the game was over we'd take them downtown and feed them dinner and then bring them back to a party at Zack's apartment so they could meet and socialize with our team members. Sunday we would help the coaches work out the recruits before the coaches met with them and their parents. It was all routine, but very important to the long term success of our team. We needed good recruits ever year to continue competing at the top levels of the Big Ten and for a spot in the BCS Championship game.

--oooOooo--

I went into my meeting with Dr. Brennan on Tuesday afternoon unsure of what to expect. Dr. Brennan greeted me warmly and seated me on the opposite side of her desk from her when I arrived at her office in the Weaver Building. She finished some paperwork for a minute or so before she was ready for me. The office was small, filled to the ceiling with books and notebooks. I scanned the titles as I waited for my professor to finish. She had an amazing collection of books about military history and the American Civil War. I could only dream of having a collection like that some day.

"Mr. Martin, thank you for coming in today," Dr. Brennan said when she turned her attention to me. "May I call you, Kyle? Mr. Martin seems so formal."

"Certainly, Dr. Brennan," I agreed. She seemed friendly and informal, but not so informal that I would venture to ask to call her Kathy instead of Dr. Brennan.

"I was extremely impressed by your paper, Kyle," she explained. "It was well researched and footnoted. It was clearly written. You obviously have done historical research and term papers before."

"Yes ma'am," I replied. "I had a history teacher in high school for two years who assigned us a quarterly term papers and hour long oral presentations. He was a stickler for proper research and foot noting."

"That's a good background, which explains the work you did," Dr. Brennan agreed. "When I picked up your paper and saw the title, 'The Storming of Quebec' I was expecting the usual battle account of Wolfe's army scaling the cliffs and fighting on the Plains of Abraham that I see from freshmen and sophomores every year. Your paper was different."

"Thank you," I replied.

"I was impressed by the section you had on the importance of British seapower on the battle's outcome. That and the section you included on logistics," Dr. Brennan explained. "Why did you include that?"

"I thought it was important," I replied. "Can you imagine Wolfe trying to march the whole way down the Saint Lawrence with his little army without the Royal Navy to help? How could he have fed his army and brought enough ammunition to fight a battle assuming he could reach Quebec?"

Dr. Brennan smiled and asked, "Have you heard of the saying, 'Amateurs study strategy and tactics. Professionals study logistics?"

"No," I admitted.

"You're in the College of Education, correct?" Dr. Brennan asked.

"Yes, I plan to be a history teacher," I replied.

"Have you ever considered a career as a professional historian?" Dr. Brennan asked.

"No, I never really thought about it," I replied.

"Based on the incisive questions and comments you have in class and this paper," she said. "You should consider it. I think you have the potential to be very good at it."

"You know I play football, right?" I replied.

"The whole campus knows you play football, Kyle," Dr. Brennan answered. "You had a very good game last week."

"Thank you," I responded. "My plan to be a high school history teacher is so I can combine my two loves – history and football. It's hard for me to choose which I love more."

"I see," Dr. Brennan replied, smiling at me. "Keep an open mind to the possibility of majoring in history. You would be very good at it. You don't need to make a decision right away; your course of study to teach secondary students history isn't much different than what you would have in the Department of History. Come in any time you would like to discuss the idea further. My door is always open."

"Thank you, Doctor," I answered. "I will keep this in mind."

Dr. Brennan shook my hand and wished me well against Michigan's secondary before I left. My talk with the professor was quite an ego boost. I could see myself immersing myself in the Civil War someday in the future. Would that be more satisfying than my current career path? I would need to think about it some more.

--oooOooo--

Andy let me know that Will and Abby were going to use the family's tickets to the game on Saturday. Andy said they wanted to know if they would be welcome at dinner Saturday night after the game. I e-mailed Will and let him know that Zack Hayes was one of the guides. I assured him that Zack would enjoy seeing them Saturday night.

Andy reported on his team's plans to fix the deep passing game. Coach Caffrey brought Logan and Matt in for extra video study. He was working with them on deep coverages and how to spot Andy and Dave when they were open. Coach Caffrey wouldn't confirm it, but he suspected that Logan was going to be on a very short leash on Friday night when they played Drumore. If things didn't open up, Logan was going to find himself sitting on the bench watching Matt lead our team.

Coach Burton's planning for the heart of our Big Ten schedule came into play this week. I was used exclusively on the weak side of our formation for the first four games. That was a set up for this week's game plan. On Saturday Anders and I were going to swap back and forth from slot to weak side throughout the game. We even had a couple plays were I started in the slot between Evan and Hassan and ran out routes to the far sideline. Our aim was to confuse Michigan's coverage as much as possible and to get me open deep as often as possible. We also practiced my reverse and reverse option play, hoping to get the right situation to use them too.

Our team captains finally addressed a pending question that had been around a couple weeks. Would the football team participate in the Dance-a-thon? The answer was yes. Zack, trained in leadership skills in Boy Scouts, delegated responsibility for the Thon – to me. Being equally well versed in those skills, I immediately deputized Kelly to be my assistant.

That was a wise move by me. The next organizing meeting for the Thon was Thursday evening at 7:00 pm. I had a team meeting then, so Kelly covered the meeting for me. She told me she got quite a few funny looks when she announced to the assembled frat brothers and sorority sisters that she was there to represent the football team. They accepted her when she explained that she probably would have to cover a lot of the meetings during the football season due to my full schedule.

Kelly filled me in on things when we got together after we finished our meetings. We would need to get busy on fundraising. Most of the frats and sororities had been raising funds for four or five months.

Damian obligingly agreed to study over at the Lasch Building so Kelly and I could have an hour together at my room. She suggested another role-playing fantasy. I was the stern teacher punishing the misbehaving school girl. She got a gentle spanking as well as a thorough licking (with my tongue, pun intended). We had time for a couple love-making sessions before Damian was due back in our room. It was enough to hold us over until Saturday night.

Kelly and I lingered after Friday's history class at Chambers, enjoying the early autumn sun on the benches outside. We decided to go back to our dorms by way of the Creamery for some ice cream. We walked down Bigler Road to our dorms. I received a passionate kiss good bye when I headed for the Lasch Building and practice. We wouldn't be together again until 8:00 or 8:30 Saturday night, after the game.

Friday's practice went well, with a minimum of yelling by the coaches. I made both option passes that we practiced. Hopefully I would do as well against Michigan. We were tired but confident when we left the field to shower before dinner.

We ate dinner at the Training Table and then headed back to the Lasch Building to study and review the game plan with our position coaches. Buses took us over to Toftrees for the night. We had time to relax with our teammates before our eleven o'clock lights-out.

Our game against Michigan was one of the big college games that day. ABC was televising us at 3:30 pm. That meant the coaches gave us a little extra sleep on Saturday morning. Buses hauled us back to the Lasch Building after breakfast. We went through our normal pre-game preparations.

I headed out to the reception area around a quarter to eleven to wait for Dad and Andy. They came in a few minutes later, accompanied by Will and Abby. Abby received a welcome hug and kiss on the cheek. Dad, Will and Andy had to settle for a handshake.

My brother was positively ebullient. "Am I to assume your game went better last night?" I asked.

"Better?" Andy replied, chuckling. "That's an understatement. We smacked Drumore 56-10. I had four touchdowns."

"Congratulations!" I exclaimed. "That's excellent. I guess you guys convinced Logan to throw deep."

"Not exactly," Andy answered. "It's a long story. I'll tell you about it over dinner."

"OK," I agreed. I turned to Will and Abby. "To what do I owe the pleasure of your company now? I thought I wouldn't see you guys until dinner time."

Will explained, "Abby and I wanted to check this place out and make sure it's good enough for our favorite brother to attend next year." He grinned at the implied put down of me.

I straightened up and stated, "As the BIGGER brother here, I can assure you based on my year and half of scouting out the Pennsylvania State University, you will find it will meet Andrew's needs both scholastically and athletically." We laughed at my pompous answer. "C'mon, do you want to see the football center? I'm sure the coaches won't mind."

Will and Abby looked at each other and nodded. I let Ann Marie, our receptionist, know where I was going and to have her assure Coach Burton I would be back in time to meet the other recruits. I made a point of passing the academic achievement bulletin board on the way in and pointed to my name on the Dean's List. I took them to the weight room first.

"Whoa! This is amazing, Kyle," Will said when he stepped into the weight room. "No wonder you look like you could bench press your VW."

"Not quite, Will," I replied. "But this is a big step up from using your old weights in our basement five years ago."

"That it is, little bro," Will replied. "That it is."

I showed him the trainer's facilities and the whirl pool therapy area. I showed Will and Abby the meeting rooms. We popped into one of the video rooms.

I shushed them as soon as I saw Zack and Jay staring at one of the machines, studying for the day's game. I whispered, "Zack likes quiet while he's preparing for a game."

Zack looked up before we could retreat out of the room without disturbing their work.

"Abby! Will!" Zack exclaimed in delight. "This is a great surprise." Zack hopped up and jogged over to the door. "Abby, marriage agrees with you. You're more radiant than ever."

Zack gave Abby a hug and a kiss on the cheek. Will got a hearty handshake. "Hey, Jay, come on over here," Zack commanded. "You need to meet Kyle's big brother and sister-in-law."

Zack and I introduced Jay to Will and Abby and talked.

After a couple minute I suggested, "Will, Abby, we should let these two get back to work. I wouldn't want us to be responsible for Zack screwing up during the game. He needs his study time."

"Yeah," Zack agreed laughing. "I've studied this video of Michigan twenty times. I'm sure the twenty-first time will be the key to beating them. Are you guys joining the recruits when we take them to dinner tonight?"

"Yes, Kyle thought we could tag along," Will answered. "I hope that's OK."

"Absolutely," Zack replied enthusiastically. "We haven't had time to talk since Sam and Trish's wedding."

"Excellent!" Will said. "Good luck today. I'll see you after the game."

I showed Will and Abby the locker room briefly and then took them back to the reception area. I invited them to join the team at the Training Table. Families were welcome to eat with us for the bargain price of $5 a person. Abby explained that they had a picnic lunch in the car so they planned to tailgate. Will and Abby told me to go have a good game before they left.

Chip introduced me to the other recruits who had arrived since I took Will and Abby for the tour. This week's visitors included Jon Stafford, a quarterback from Pittsburgh, Pa.; Jeff Knox, a defensive back from Columbus, Ohio; Bobby Smith, a tight end from Trenton, NJ; Michael Harris, a defensive back from Aliquippa, Pa.; and Jonah Adams, a huge kid who played defensive lineman in Baltimore.

Yasin, Trevor, Shawn Byrd and I hung out in the reception area while the recruits and their families met with Coach Burton. Yasin questioned me about my experience with my ACL reconstruction while we waited. I did my best to reassure him that he should end up with full mobility after his surgery. It was scheduled for the middle of October.

The recruits and their families joined the team for lunch when they finished their meeting with Coach Burton. The Staffords sat by Andy, Dad and me. Their son Jon seemed like a nice guy, but extremely confident, bordering on cocky.

I guess he had a right to be. He was this season's hottest Pennsylvania quarterback. He was entertaining scholarship offers from us, Miami, Florida State, Ohio State and Michigan. Some recruiting websites listed him as a four star recruit; others had him at five stars. Zack and Jay sat on the other side of the Stafford family, telling Jon about their experiences playing quarterback here at Penn State. Hopefully they could make the sale with Jon. Jay and Chip were going to need good back-ups when the older guys were gone in a year or so.

Chip and Yasin took the recruits and their parents on a tour of campus while the team and coaches went back to the locker room to finish our preparations for the game. The buses hauled us over to the stadium when we were dressed. The fans that always lined the sidewalk from the bus into the stadium locker room. They shouted out Zack's name as always. Quite a few cheered me too. I stopped and shook hands and signed a few autographs as I made my way in, just like my mentor always did.