Oil of Roses
Chapter 14

Copyright© 2005 by Jim Reader

Erotica Sex Story: Chapter 14 - Broken in spirit, Harry Grimes is saved by a young woman who turns out to need some saving herself. Together, they and their friends combine strengths and divide weaknesses, building a most unusual modern tribe and exploring the meaning of friendship, love, and sexuality in a "freak-friendly" community.

Caution: This Erotica Sex Story contains strong sexual content, including Ma/Fa   mt/ft   Fa/Fa   Ma/Ma   Consensual   Romantic   BiSexual   Heterosexual   Incest   Brother   Sister   BDSM   DomSub   MaleDom   FemaleDom   Light Bond   Spanking   Group Sex   Harem   Orgy   Polygamy/Polyamory   Interracial   Black Female   White Male   White Female   Oriental Female   Hispanic Female   Indian Female   Anal Sex   Analingus   Double Penetration   First   Masturbation   Oral Sex   Pegging   BBW   Slow  

As soon as Eddy and Tamara had made their goodbyes, Margo came and sat next to her husband. "So, are they going to be an item?" she asked, mischievousness oozing from every syllable.

"Oh yeah, only a matter of time, as if with Our Lady of Empathy doing the matchmaking there was ever much doubt."

"That's good. Eddy needs someone who'll love him and take care of him and I might volunteer for the job if I weren't already well and truly spoken for by two of the most loveable hedonists on the planet."

"Yeah, I don't see Carol and me giving you your walking papers any day soon." He faked a belch and scratched his armpit. "Yew're jus' too gawddamn handy in the kitchen, woman, and yew're purty good with a broom 'n' a mop, too."

She turned to him, the sweet smile on her face doing nothing to disguise the evil gleam in her eyes. "Why Harry, how kind of you to say so." She leaned close and whispered in his ear as she massaged his cock, "I wonder if you'll still think so highly of my domestic skills after I tie you down and do nasty, horrible things to you with that broom and mop?"

"Well, long as you lube 'em first, we should be okay."

Her composure dissolved into a fit of giggles. Harry held his wife close to him and breathed in the scent of her. It was good to be alive and be in love and have such a wonderful woman as his bride.

"Shall we go watch the floor show?" Margo said.

"Oh, let's," Harry replied.

And a floor show it was. Carol still held down Kelly, but had turned her over and was licking the bottom of her ass cheeks as they came out from under the shorts. Kelly writhed beneath her, obviously enjoying the attention. Jessica was watching, one hand at her breasts and the other in her crotch. It was obvious she was headed for an orgasm.

It occurred to Harry that if this show went on much longer, Kelly was in for some rug burns. "Why don't you two relax a little and let the serious play time wait till we're upstairs?" he said.

The two women got up off the floor and then stood in front of Jessica, within inches of her. Kelly's top was still down and Carol began to lick and suck at her breasts. After a few moments, Kelly turned a saliva-wetted tit towards Jessica, the nipple perhaps an inch before her lips. "You sure you don't want to play with us, pretty one?" the beautiful black woman cooed.

"N-n-no, I j-just w-w-want to w-watch," Jessica stammered out.

Carol turned Kelly away from her and bent Kelly over, then slipped two fingers into Kelly's wet cunt and brought them out, damp and smelling of arousal. She smoothly waved them back and forth beneath Jessica's nose. "Are you sure you don't want to play with Kelly and me, Jessica?" She brought her mouth to Jessica's ear, within a hair's breadth, and said "Three is so much more fun than two."

Jessica closed her eyes, her body stiffened and jerked as she moaned quietly. The orgasm she was riding out couldn't have been more evident to onlookers if she'd had neon signs above her head blinking on and off "She's Coming Now". Once she could focus her eyes again, she said "No, really... I just love watching. I have a boyfriend who is going to fuck me so hard I won't walk for a week, just because of what I tell him about tonight. He doesn't understand why I like to watch other people so much either, but it doesn't stop him from getting incredibly excited when I tell him what I've seen."

"Well then, let's let you see a little more." Carol motioned for Kelly to hop up on the table. She went to her bag, rummaged about in it and then returned. Kneeling before Kelly's wide open legs she said "For this next part of the performance I request absolute quiet from the audience." She looked up at Kelly. "Trust me, honey?"

"Just be careful."

"Oh, I will be." Carol leaned in and took the crotch seam of Kelly's shorts in her teeth, pulling it away from her as far as it would go. Then out of her pocket, she flashed her straight razor, opened it and slid it under the seam, hollow-ground edge away from Kelly, and slowly and carefully cut through the strip of cloth that linked front and back.

Suddenly Kelly was wearing a very ragged mini-skirt.

Then Carol grasped the crotch seam of the thong with her teeth and pulled it away from her lover. Carefully she positioned the razor and let go. Like a knife through butter the razor sliced through the thong and Kelly's wet cunt was exposed to the world.

Harry had been aware of Karen and Patricia standing behind him for some time. Karen leaned forward and whispered "Harry, is it like this every night at your place?"

"Not every night, no... but a lot of nights... it seems like it... yeah."

Patricia asked "What do you... how do you handle... you know what I mean!"

"Yeah, yeah I do... Patricia, to tell you the truth, I come... a lot. I mean, frequently... voluminously... it's really kind of frightening how much I come..."

"Shhhh," Karen said, "I think we get the picture."

"No Sappho, I really don't think you do. Imagine if every time your cunt twitched, you got an erection, I mean, your strap-on magically came to life and reacted like a real penis. Patricia can fill in for Margo. So, not only do you have the bountiful charms of Patricia, but Carol is always there and it seems that Kelly is there more often than not. The two of them... the erotic super nova duet... doing this kind of thing. And every time your cunt twitches, Sappho, erection time... in a house with three women who want to help you with that problem. Can you put yourself there in your mind?"

"Jesus Christ Harry, do you think you'll be able to find the strength to make it in three days a week? Are we going to have to cut your hours back some more?"

"There are days when I wonder that myself, Sappho."

Meanwhile, back at the table, Carol had begun to lick Kelly's cunt while Jessica watched, entranced.

From the entrance to the section, "Jessica? Jessica? Are you in there?"

"Damn, it's Mom," she moaned. She quickly put herself back together and turned to Margo. "Do I look presentable?"

Margo looked her over then leaned forward, sniffing her. "Yeah, but you smell like you've been fucking."

"Shit. Well, I'll have to tough it out."

Carol went up to her and licked her ear lobe, touching her for the first time. "You want to see more, you know where we are."

"Well don't be surprised if there's a knock at the door tonight then."

Kelly came and hung herself on Carol, licking her lips suggestively. "Oh we won't, Jessica you plump little angel, we won't be surprised at all."

"Jessica?"

"There in a minute Mrs. Reynolds."

The waitress smiled and then, most unexpectedly, kissed Kelly on the lips. "You are amazing. If I was going to stop watching and start playing, I'd start playing with you."

She hurried out into the bar to speak with her mother.

Kelly and Carol looked at each other, eyebrows raised and smirks on their faces.

"I am gonna fuck that little white girl," Kelly proclaimed.

"Yes you are, girl, you are gonna take her and make her do the pant & beg."

"Uh huh, that's right, girlfriend, she might as well tattoo "Kelly's" above that pretty pussy 'cause I am gonna own that by the end of the night."

"Might as well get her a new collar all picked out."

"Are the two of you through with Kelly and Carol's Great Urban Trash Talk Extravaganza?" Margo asked, smiling. "I was thinking you might want to refasten your top and we might want to take this party upstairs to the suite, just in case her condition raises any questions with her mother, you know, the manager of this fine establishment."

Harry went to take care of the tab while the women clustered around Kelly and effectively shielded her from view all the way to the elevator. They held it until Harry caught up with them. Their suite key accessed the top floor and by the time the doors opened Carol and Kelly were locked into a kiss and embrace.

Karen and Patricia hung back in the elevator. "I guess it's time for us to be hitting our room, guys," Karen said.

"Not unless you want it to be," Harry replied. "The light level's going to be even lower up here and we brought the stash of booze from the house. The suite has plenty of comfortable places to sit and make out... or whatever... and if you don't mind neither do we."

Patricia thought about how comfortable she felt with these people. "Can we stay, Liz? I wouldn't mind enjoying the ambient orgy vibe a little while longer." Her hand stroked the side of Karen's breast. "Who knows, you might get lucky, get to fuck me on a couch like we were teenagers." Karen looked at Harry and said "We'll be joining you in the suite."

The inside of the Presidential Suite was huge. The sitting room area alone was larger than most hotel rooms, a wonderfully soft king size bed in an enormous bedroom area and a decently sized bar and kitchenette. The bathroom featured a huge Jacuzzi tub in the bathroom. The suite proper, as well as the bathroom, offered a beautiful view of the city. All in all, a perfect place for a party.

The drapes and curtains were thrown open and the city spread its twinkling glory below them as every light in the suite was extinguished.

"Carol, come help me set up the coffee maker," Harry said.

"Coming sir, just getting undressed."

"Well by all means, please attend to that first. I was strongly considering just stripping you out of your clothes in the bar but figured there'd be no quick way to get them back on if we needed to."

"Oh sir, you'd be amazed what blind panic can do for your speed-dressing skills."

"Harry, you evil malevolent bastard, are you setting up to make your Irish Coffee?" called Karen from a couch across the room.

"Damn sure am, Sappho. Something tells me I'm going to need the caffeine tonight."

Patricia wandered out of the bathroom. "My God, that tub is huge. It looks big enough to do a 'Shark Tank' in."

"Excuse me, a what?" Harry asked.

"Something some friends of mine created when we were in college, it sort of spread campus wide. It started as a kind of dare, like in 'truth or dare'. What the victim did was kneel for a certain amount of time, naked and blindfolded, in the middle of a hot tub filled with people teasing them. The teasers were only allowed to use hands and mouths. Scoring was based on the length of time they resisted. Then variations evolved, like one where the victim knelt there until they gave in and went for one of the teasers, then the two of them were left alone in the tub. Or another variant where that was just the starting gun for an orgy. The only way I ever played it was the original version, with my lover standing by to reap the benefits of my time in the tank."

"YOU TOOK TURNS IN THE TANK?" said Karen. She walked over, stripped down to her sports bra and briefs. "They did all-female tanks?"

"No. No, they didn't. That was why the rules were set up as they were. Only hands and mouths because everybody, male, female, gay, straight, bi, big, small, skinny, overweight, everybody had those. I know I had guys pawing me but it didn't really matter. My body responded because it was all teasing, it was all fingers and lips, hands and tongues. Needless to say only clean-shaven guys were allowed in a proper 'Shark Tank'."

"Damn, you had something else in your past that would raise my eyebrows, besides that thing with the preacher's wife at church camp. I am impressed."

Carol dragged Harry's head down to hers. "We are SO doing a proper 'shark tank' when the hot tub is up and running."

Margo appeared behind him, gloriously naked. "Yes, yes we are."

Harry yielded to the inevitable. "Yes ma'am, I wouldn't think otherwise. A proper 'shark tank' shall be done, probably more than once."

"Does anyone have a need for the tub," asked Kelly, "because I'd like to catch a quick bath if nobody minds?" No one did so Kelly skipped off into the bathroom to start the tub filling.

Harry had gotten both sides of the coffee maker running, as well as the one that came with the room. He was shedding his clothes when there was a knock at the door. "Damn! Hold on." As he struggled to get his pants back on when Kelly walked to the door and threw it open in all her naked glory.

"Hi Jessica, thought it would be you."

The young woman walked into the room cautiously, more carefully still when the door closed behind her and she had even less light to see by. "Business was slow, so Mom let me off. Those very generous tips you left me, the bartender and your other waitress certainly soothed her mood about losing the whole back section for part of the evening. She figures you as big spenders for sure now. I brought a bottle of vodka the bartender keeps behind the bar for me... didn't know if you had anything to drink up here besides that horribly overpriced minibar." She walked to the bar area. "I see I needn't have bothered." She looked around. "It's even darker in here than you had it downstairs."

Kelly was on her like a cheetah on a slow gazelle. "That's because most of us are naked, Angel, or we're going to be that way real soon. And that's what I wanted to talk to you about. See, that's gonna be a problem for you." Kelly started to unbutton Jessica's uniform.

"What do you mean?"

"This whole 'watching' thing you've got going, it's all fine and good, but it's too dark in here to watch, you're gonna have to get close and touch, Angel."

Jessica's hands made futile attempts to re-button what Kelly had undone. "But I don't touch, I just watch."

"Harry, would you please see to my water, I think it's about ready. No, Angel, tonight one of two things is going to happen. Either you're going to be naked and fucking me," her pulled Jessica's face to hers and she kissed her, the tongue she thrust down the girl's throat an assault on her barriers, "or you're going to go home and wonder for the rest of your life what you missed out on." She pulled Jessica's uniform down to the floor and the girl stepped out of it, blinking, a bemused look upon her face. "And let me guess, your boyfriend really gets excited when you tell him about watching two girls together, doesn't he? Even more excited than when you tell him about watching a guy and a girl?"

"Uh, yeah, yeah he does."

Kelly was on her knees, helping Jessica out of her shoes. "Then just think how excited he's going to be when you tell him one of the girls was you."

"No... no I'm going to get dressed and go. I think it was a mistake to come here."

Kelly wrapped her arms around the girl's waist and jammed her face into Jessica's crotch. "Ummm, Angel, either you're lying to me and to yourself or your cunt's lying." She stood up, reached around behind Jessica and unhooked her bra. "See, it's all hot and wet, and it smells heavenly. If I have to pick one of you to believe, I'll believe it over you any day."

Karen, seated on the couch cuddling with a mostly naked Patricia, said, "When does this become rape?"

Harry, who had returned from the bathroom and was making the Irish Coffees said, "Don't worry, you'll see here in a minute that it isn't rape."

Beyond hearing or seeing what went on around them, the two young women continued their dance. Jessica's bra fell to the floor and she stood, clad in nothing but panties and pantyhose. Her rapid breath and erect nipples left little doubt as to her excitement. She looked around at the others, vague shapes in the darkness. "What about them?"

"No, don't worry, Angel, I promise you're not about to become a party favor. Oh, some of them might tease you some, but the only one you have to worry about fucking you is me. So," she said, stepping back, "what's it going to be? Either finish undressing or get dressed and leave. Your choice."

"See," Harry said, "that's why you don't have to worry, Sappho. She's going to have her chance to walk away."

In her own little world, Jessica Reynolds stared at the beautiful woman in front of her, naked and horny and so hot. Jessica didn't feel threatened by these people, she felt strange but not threatened. Slowly she started peeling down her pantyhose.

Kelly came over and put Jessica's head between her breasts. "You are a good girl; I knew you'd make the right decision. How old are you, honey?"

"Eighteen."

"Ummm, sweet eighteen and I bet you've never been locked in a sixty-nine with another woman, have you?"

"No... I've never even kissed another woman before tonight."

"Well, we are gonna pop so many of your cherries this evening."

Harry wandered around and asked Patricia and Jessica how they took their coffee, then went back and finished his preparations.

"Angel," Kelly said, "are you all the way off duty or would you mind helping Harry serve the coffee?"

"Not a problem," Jessica replied, glad to be doing something familiar and totally safe for a moment.

After everyone was served, Harry announced, "Toast time. To family, loved ones and friends new and old!"

The toast was echoed, followed by sounds of blowing and careful slurping throughout the room.

"Goddamn Harry, if I had any, and I mean ANY, desire for dick, I would blow you for this coffee," said Patricia.

"Told you," said Karen, "even if he wasn't good for anything else in the universe, this would justify his existence."

Kelly walked over to Harry, knelt and slid his dick into her mouth.

"WHOA! That's different," said Harry, "she's got a mouthful of coffee!"

Everyone laughed. "A little too hot for you, Harry?" asked Margo.

"No... no... no, just a little unexpected, that's all." Kelly finished teasing him and then cleaned his cock off with a damp bar towel.

"Another toast," Harry said. "To absent friends."

"To absent friends."

Kelly took Jessica by the hand and they headed for the bathroom. "My bath girl and I are going to be busy for awhile. If anyone needs to potty, come on in, you won't disturb us but we might just disturb you."

Margo curled up on a couch next to Harry as Carol sat down at his feet. "Harry," Margo said, "have we created a monster?"

"What do you mean beloved?"

"Well, Carol is given leave to seduce, Kelly. A 24 year-old takes a 22 year-old. Now Kelly takes Jessica. A 22 year-old takes an 18 year-old. Both incidents are startlingly similar, people in the food service industry, both incidents primarily beginning with the opening of a door at a place of residence, no matter how temporary in this case. How soon are we going to read in the newspaper about Jessica Reynolds being found in flagrante delicto with a 10 year-old Girl Scout who rang her doorbell to sell her cookies?"

The five of them had a good laugh over the thought.

Carol crawled over to Margo and wormed between her legs, resting her head on her thighs and staring up at her. "Would you like me to dress as a Girl Scout, Madam? Show up at the door one day and let you take advantage of me?" She kissed the inside of Margo's thighs. "Roll around the living room floor while we stab each other's cunts with tubes of cookies? I'd even shave myself for it if you wanted me to. Would you like that, Madam?"

"Let me think on that, Baby Girl." Margo slid herself to the edge of the couch, grasping Carol's head and shoving the girl's face into her cunt. "Lick on that while I think about it."

Harry watched the two women in his life, his cock hardening by the second. "Uh, honey, if it turns out you're not interested in that particular bit of role-playing, I think I might be."

Margo laughed. "Might be indeed, from the look of your dick... or is that your reaction to what we're doing right now?"

"Actually, that's my reaction to the part of the fantasy where you come home unexpectedly, catching me fucking the Girl Scout and instead of getting pissed off, you get out the strap on and fuck her in the ass while she blows me." As if on cue, Harry's cock gave a strong twitch and a whimper of desire came from Carol's throat.

"Oh, that's the part of the fantasy you were enjoying. I thought it might be the part where we decide not to let the little cum slut go home to her Mommy and Daddy and just decide to keep her, be her new Mommy and Daddy. Can't let her out of the house, somebody might see her... we'll have to keep her chained up in the bedroom."

Carol's hands both went to her crotch as she masturbated furiously, all the while increasing the intensity of her attentions to Margo's cunt. A low and steady whimpering came from her throat. "Can you imagine her, sitting there in the shredded rags of her Girl Scout uniform, being forced to work on getting her Fellatio Badge?" Margo shook as she climaxed. "I think the little slut already has her Cunnilingus Badge. Ummm... umm... umm... nope, she doesn't need to work on getting that one. Oooooh, tongue fuck me, sweetheart! That's it, uh huh."

On the opposite couch, Karen and Patricia were lost in each other, only hearing what was going on near them as Patricia lay face down on top of Karen, caressing her, while Karen gently and lovingly licked Patricia's pussy. The ongoing commotion across the table from them bothered them not at all and in fact, the sounds of Margo and Carol had done Patricia's libido nothing but good as she lost her remaining inhibitions and began to grind herself into Karen's face, her excitement becoming evident by a series of low, breathy exhalations.


She was nine years old and it was that final night when so many little things went wrong and she had to be on top of things all the time because if just one little thing wasn't right it could all start to go to pieces and it just took one little thing, just one. Mommy was home from the hospital again with a new medicine to keep her well. During the day she was Tammy's responsibility so Tammy had to make sure she took her medicine every day at lunch but Mommy didn't want to take her medicine so Tammy had to be real extra special careful to make sure she took it. Even though Mommy was on medicine Tammy and Daddy still locked up the sharp things in a cabinet in the kitchen because if Mommy went bad again she wouldn't mean to hurt them but she would. Now that Mommy was home Tammy couldn't be alone with her Daddy because that might set Mommy off so Daddy didn't read her bedtime stories anymore unless Mommy was with him and even when she had medicine she never wanted to sit with Daddy while he did that.

They had finished supper and it was bedtime and Mommy was 'zoned out', like Daddy called it, in front of the television. Daddy had said "she'll never know" and had taken Tammy and tucked her in and was reading her a story about Gossamer Goose and his friends and their adventures in Mallardtown when Daddy spit up red all over her bedsheets and her face and the sharp shiny point of the knife had come through his shirt front and it had started getting red there too and he coughed up some more red as he turned and it sprayed across her wall and it looked like the silhouettes of Gossamer and his friends flying for home and he was looking at Mommy and she was screaming that he never loved her it had always been about his precious Theresa and his hands were grabbing at the back of his shirt trying to grip the knife and he couldn't get it. Behind him she saw Mommy raise the other knife and she looked almost sad when she said that now Daddy and Theresa would be together forever and Daddy and Mommy fought with each other for the knife and then Daddy was falling towards her on the bed and he caught himself on his arms. Mommy laid down on the floor and was very still and Daddy looked in her eyes and said "It's okay, Theresa, you're gonna be fine" and then he slid down on top of her and she screamed and screamed and screamed and kept screaming until someone came.

When it really happened, the neighbors had come eventually and pulled him off of her but in the dream they never came.

And she'd relived that night so many times that she didn't even wake up anymore she just cried in her sleep and her screams came out as soft moans of pain and while she knew it wasn't her fault there was a nine year-old inside her who would always know that she had killed her Daddy and Mommy by letting first one and then several more little things get away from her. Mommy had been faking taking her medicine and Tammy didn't catch it, Tammy didn't make Daddy put the knives away, Tammy didn't stop Daddy from doing something that would set Mommy off. Tammy killed Daddy and Mommy.

In his sleep Eddy heard her and pulled her into his arms and stroked her back for a long, long time until she finally began to relax and come out of her fetal position. He comforted her without even fully waking up.

In her dream she was screaming and then the giant came and he gently put Daddy on the floor and he said "Theresa, there's nothing to be scared of anymore" and he wiped the blood of her face and picked her up in his arms and carried her towards the door and she said "I don't want to leave Daddy" and he said "You can't leave him, he's in your heart, little one, where he always will be" and then he took her away from there.


In the tub Jessica had given up all pretense of fighting and was wholeheartedly joining in her own seduction. Their coffee cups were empty. Kelly took her mouth off Jessica's throat. "What'll I have to do to get you to go get us both something to drink? Anything, ask for anything."

"Ummm, well..."

"Come on, Angel, out with it, what do you want nasty and naughty Kelly to do?"

"You'll think it's gross..."

"I doubt it but you'll never know for sure if you don't ask."

"I want to lick your ass and I want you to lick mine," Jessica said in a rush, as if afraid she'd be interrupted.

Kelly laughed. "Is that all? Girlfriend, that was gonna happen whether you wanted it to or not, at least the me-licking-you part. I'll take rum and coke, thank you very much."

As Jessica stood up in the tub Kelly grabbed her and thrust her tongue in-between the soft round globes of her bottom, running her tongue up and down the crack.

"OOOOOOOH, KELLY, I don't think I'm going to get us drinks while you're doing THAT!"

Kelly gently forced her tongue into Jessica's ass, firmly and irresistibly, thrusting it, wriggling it, flexing it.

"Fuck DRINKS, oh my God, HMMmmm."

Kelly finally pulled back. "Think of that as a down payment, Angel."

"Okay... now let's see if I can still walk," she said as she carefully climbed out of the tub. "What did you say you wanted again?"

"Rum and coke, sweetie."

"Right, got it."

She walked out of the bathroom into the living room. The sounds and smells of sex were thick in the air. She knelt down for a moment and watched as Karen ate Patricia while carefully sliding two fingers in and out of her butt. She crossed to the opposite side and squatted beside Margo, watching her masturbate as Harry fucked Carol in the mouth. She remembered she was supposed to be doing something... then she remembered, drinks. She made them their drinks and then went back to the bathroom. "Is it always like this around y'all?"

"No, Angel, sometimes it's even better. Now get your plump butt in here and let me love on you."

"Yes ma'am."


Harry was cuddled on the couch with his wife and their pet and watched the dim figures of Karen and Patricia as they made love. It was not only beautiful in the traditional sense but he found himself fascinated by the apparently effortless fashion with which Karen repositioned Patricia at will. After a particularly intense series of orgasms for Patricia that left her gasping "No more, no more", she and Karen stopped and sat, cuddling each other, side by side.

"You two are really beautiful together," Margo said.

Karen smiled. "Thank you. This was our first performance before an audience; we hope you liked the show." Her voice betrayed her weariness.

Patricia poked her in the ribs. "Don't get self-conscious; they were busy through a lot of it."

"You sound tired Sappho; I thought you were the unstoppable engine of destruction?"

"Harry, you little shit, don't make me laugh, I'm too tired. Free weights are nothing compared to hoisting Ms. Big Butt here around."

"I DO NOT HAVE A BIG BUTT!"

"Oh yes you do my love and I wouldn't change it if I could. My sweetie got some padding on her, just the way I like 'em."

"It is a very nice, well-endowed butt," said Harry. "Looks tasty," Carol chimed in. "Lusciously delectable," said Margo.

"Alright, you three can stay but you, Amazonian Warrior, are gone, banished from my sight!" She raised her voice. "I will offer my charms to Kelly who will not insult me by calling my sumptuous tushie a 'big butt'."

"No," came Kelly's voice from the bathroom, "I'll go all Urban Trash Talk on you and call it a Bootylicious Bonanza of Big Bodacious Back!"

"Perhaps trading Liz in for Kelly is not the brightest idea I've had today," laughed Patricia.

"Besides," came Jessica's voice, "Kelly's already... OH... got a bottom she's... ohmygod... involved with."

Harry got up and walked towards the bathroom.

 
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