Chapter 2

Falling as my flesh gripped the porcelain edge. The lights seemingly turned off. The room feeling colder than it had ever before. My neck on fire against the cool air. Unable to stop myself from collapsing, even if I had tried. Before I could think I felt my cheek crash into the floor. The slapping of my flesh ringing through my ears, pounding through my head. I tried to open my eyes. I struggled with the weighted lids. Only able to peek from behind my lashes. Hardly able to see anything except his shoes. My vision coming and going with every slow slight blink. Watching his foot raise and push my shoulder as I easily fall over, leaving my face lying to the side. I watch his legs move in closer and bend at the knee. I want to scream out. I’m not sure exactly what is happening. I just remember coming in here to get away for a moment. Who is this?! Why isn’t he helping me up?!

I feel his fingers grasping at the fabric of my thong, his fingers brushing against my skin. Feeling the cool air landing across my pelvis and legs. The cold tiles warming slowly under my bottom. Each soft slow breath seems to take ages. I wish his face would move into my view just a bit. Just so I could see him. Soon he’s got my intimate fabric sliding down my thighs as he pulls and shifts them further down. I can only wonder ‘Why? Why is he taking my panties?’ Soon the heaviness in my lids takes over and I feel myself unable to fight it as the pounding within my head sings me to sleep.

I slowly open my eyes, staring out straight ahead of me. I see the shadows beneath the door of people walking by. I feel the faint humming of my pulse as I lift my head, leaning up while pushing my skirt down. I briefly look around to see if anyone is in the room with me and see that I’m by myself. That is short-lived as the door opens and someone walks in. I try to casually get up off of the floor but I just slide a bit, landing mainly on my bottom. My ass hitting a cold spot of tile as I flinch.

“OH! Oh dear, what are you doing down there?” They asked, surprised to see me.

“I just slipped ... That’s all.” I feel myself blush. Sort of embarrassed.

Not that I even think I fell, not by accident anyway ... The flash of me sliding off the sink plays again in my head. ‘Yeah ... You slipped alright, Radhika ... Slipped.’ I think to myself.

They begin to step in closer to me and reach a hand out. I grab their hand, and use the offered leverage to pull myself to my feet. Ugh! ... I feel so weak. Like I just had my ass kicked. I begin to brush myself off.

“Thank you.” I sigh, almost shaking my head at myself.

“No problem, glad to help. So what did you slip on? Or how did you slip?” They stare at me with a curious expression.

The thing is ... I don’t really know what had happened. I glance to the sink ... Then to my hands. I feel like I want to remember something ... Even though I have no clue what it is that I want to remember.

“I’m not sure, maybe clumsy feet?” I sort of laugh off.

I notice they’re beginning to look closely at me. Unsure why, but it’s making me uncomfortable. I smile briefly, trying to look sincere.

“Again ... Thank you for the help, but I must be going now. “ I give a short wave as I press the hem of my skirt to my thigh and head to the door.

Once opening the door I step into the hallway. Seems to be less traffic than there had been when I had first woken and stared at the moving shadows that danced under the door. I rub my hand across my neck, feeling that it is tender to the touch. I pull my hair to help conceal my neck. Feeling the heat along the skin. The tender pain ... It tries to trigger a thought, just there almost within reach. I hear the voice, “Radhika...” followed by dull taps. It plays over and over again in my head. I know the voice ... But I can’t seem to pinpoint from where ... Or even why?

I walk across the hall into the lounge and keep my eyes on the floor. I do so casually as I watch my shoe with each step. Glancing up to make sure I’m heading into the right direction as I make my way to a little closet. There’s a mirror inside that I can use to look at myself, I can try to figure out why my neck and throat burns. After several more steps I reach the door, turning the knob as I scan to check if anyone is watching. I quickly open the door and slide into the little dark room as I reach feeling for the light switch. I pull the door shut behind me as I turn the switch, glancing up to the light as it forces me to squint for a moment.

I run my fingers softly over my throat as I lean my head back, observing my flesh. Wincing occasionally when my fingers brush sensitive spots. I can see bruises forming, but I don’t understand why. I lean my face in closer to the mirror as I turn my head to get a better view of the side. My breath quickens as another image of me staring into my own face fills my head. Me ... With fear, shock, and hands clenched tight around me. A choking feeling begins to form. I shake my head and stare into the mirror. I try to brush the feeling off, I don’t understand where these thoughts are coming from! I’m beginning to feel as if I’m going crazy! Although ... Those marks are there ... Those images are there ... They do add up ... but to what?

I turn around and step out of the closet and smile to the several people there. They chatter and laugh on the couch. Normally I’d be in the mix. Goofing off, flirting and teasing. Not this time. I just feel so confused and lost. Lost in my own mind, trying to figure out what has happened ... If anything had actually even happened. I begin to make my way through the room the same way as I came in. Eyes on the floor, watching it each step.

I walk by someone I’ve seen before many times. Except this time I notice his shoe. That same shoe from the bathroom! It flashes in my head again that shoe nudging me onto my back. Standing there while he washed his hands. Stood there bending, leaning down. I stop and look up slowly as my eyes meet his. I feel my heart sink as the image of him grabbing my throat and slamming into the wall floods my head with every thing that had followed.

“YOU!!” I surprisingly yell, with a frustrated squeak.

I feel the attention of the room quickly fall on me as everyone went quiet. He looks up to me. Drumming his fingers on the table as he observes my face and smiles a bit.

“Me? ... What do you mean?” He smiles.

“You ... You ... Those shoes ... Your voice ... You tried to kill me!” I blurt out feeling my face get hot as I notice my hands shaking, my arms outstretched and pointing my finger at him.

“What?! What the fuck are you talking about, Radhika?” He asks while laughing softly.

“In the bathroom ... You tried to strangle me! What the hell?!” I screech, feeling myself getting pissed off as more of the events unfold in my head.

“Woah ... Just woah ... Hold on a minute ... Obviously you had forgotten it was a mutual thing that we both wanted to experiment with.” As he looks around the room as if he’s addressing everyone.

“No ... I wouldn’t have ever agreed to do what you did to me! You ... you ra ... You raped me.” The words almost came from my lips in a whisper.

His face became very serious as the chatter in the room picked up again in hushed sounds. Everyone trying to figure out what is going on and what I’m talking about. He stands rubbing his face into his palms and drags them together downward.

“My god, Radhika ... Do you need the attention this bad? You wanted me to fuck you. You asked me to choke you. Now you want to pretend you didn’t while you dance around in front of everyone ... Maybe we can talk about this in private?” He stares at me with his eyebrows raised while he gestures for us to go elsewhere.