S01.E08 - Karen (49)

Series 1, Episode 8: Karen

We’re in the living room of a well appointed and quite attractive home.

The woman sitting infront of us is middle aged, slim and tanned - a little too tanned to be honest, with her skin just beginning to leather up. Blonde hair from a bottle, a twinkle in her eyes. She’s not a bad looking woman, in her prime she was most likely hot stuff. She speaks with a midland’s accent that hints at a life-time of cigarettes and alcohol.

“My name is Karen Sellars, I’m a 49 year old, and I’m from Coventry.”

We see her at home, interacting with her teenage children – Kyle (a gay 18 year old boy) and Leah (a 14 year old version of her mother), preparing a dinner, and intercut with footage of her working on the reception desk at a local building firm.

“I was quite the wild young thing when I left school. I used to travel with rock bands – the whole ‘Almost Famous’ thing. I was totally a groupie in the big hair rock days. Poison, Bon Jovi, Def Leppard, Quiet Riot, Kiss ... All of them really. Then when I hit 30 I thought, ‘time to grow up’ and I met a nice man, and married him, had these two, and then found out he wasn’t a nice man, so I divorced him and got the house.”

“Then I met another nice man ... Married him. Thought he was really special – until he started suggesting that Leah (she indicates her daughter) should join us in bed ... Don’t get me wrong, I had a crazy life, I wouldn’t say no to anything – which is why you’re here ... But she was only 12 at the time. Not old enough to make up her own mind. So again ... I divorced him and got the house. Then I sold both houses and bought this one.”

“I work as a receptionist for a local building firm – simple stuff to help make ends meet. When the kids have moved out I’ll sell the house and buy a flat and live off the money left-over. I never planned on working until retirement age.”

Kyle and Leah have been told that Karen is appearing on a show about fulfilling your naughty fantasies.

Leah, a pretty 14 year old girl who’s boobs already fill out her t-shirt, “Mum’s always been a bit wild. She’s told us ‘some’ of her stories about touring with bands in the 80s and we know she knew how to party when she was young. I’m not surprised she wants to go on a show like this.”

Kyle, a slim looking 18 year old with a great body, acne covered face, and over-styled hair, is interviewed. He has an almost comically effeminate voice. “Mum is incredible. She’s so crazy. So much fun. When I came out she was so supportive of me – I never doubted her love for, like, a nano-second. I want her to do whatever makes her happy. I don’t care what it is.”

Leah, with a smile, “Honestly, with mum, I dread to think what ‘fantasies’ she might have that she hasn’t already fulfilled!”

And we’re back with Karen, in the living room, alone.

How do you think your children will react when they find out what you want to do?

“I think Kyle will be 100% behind me. Leah, I’m not so sure. I think she’ll most likely be disgusted – she’s not even had a serious boyfriend yet and she still thinks that all sex is a bit ‘yucky’”

A moment later, and Kyle and Leah are sitting on the couch with their mother. We listen, fly-on-the-wall style as she talks to them.

“Now, you know I’m going on this show to fulfil my fantasy, right?”

They acknowledge that.

“And you know this is going to involve mummy actually having sex infront of the cameras, for the tv.”

They acknowledge that as well – this time Kyle has a bit of a smirk on his face whilst Leah is looking like she’d rather be anywhere but here.

“But what you don’t know is exactly what my fantasy is...”

Leah tries to wave her mother away, she doesn’t want to know; Kyle is amused, he wants to know...

“As you know, I was a little crazy when I was younger. I’ve done most of the things women fantasize about. Doing it with famous people. Threesomes and orgies, and doing it on tropical beaches. But there’s one thing I never tried when I was young, and I always regretted it ... So, this weekend Mummy’s going to go away to Bristol ... And I’m going to have sex ... With ... A dog.”

She holds her breath. Kyle is open mouthed in awe of his mother. Leah has her hand over her mouth in shock ... Then she bolts out of the room shouting, “Oh mum, you’re sick!”

Kyle leans in and gives his mum a hug, very supportive.

“You’re okay with this, son?”

“Mum, you’ve been okay with everything I’ve done, how couldn’t I be okay with you, darl?”

Two days later, Karen grabbing her overnight bag and heading out of the front door, a hug and a goodbye from Kyle. She shouts her goodbye upstairs to Leah without reply.

On the driveway, next to her car. Karen addresses the camera. “Hello, my name is Karen Sellars, and I want to have sex with a dog.”

In the car, driving out of Coventry, Karen talks to the camera.

“She hasn’t said much since I told them. I think she’s more embarrassed about me having sex on tv than she is about me having sex with a dog.” She keeps driving.

When did you first think about having sex with a dog?

“It wasn’t a dog. I was touring with a band. I won’t say which one. Just being myself – having fun, giving blowies on the bus and stuff like that. One of the guys in the band says he’s always wanted to see a woman giving a horse a blowjob, and I just said – as a joke – if you can find me a horse I’ll give it a blow job for you ... And no one mentioned it again, and when the tour ended and the boys moved on to Asia I stayed in England, and nothing happened. But I always thought about it. If one of the guys had asked, I would have done anything. I heard on the grapevine years later that the same guy used to get girls to blow horses when they were touring in America – he knew where he could access horses over there ... I felt a little cheated really.”

So you’d rather have sex with a horse?

“No. Not really. Just an animal. Any animal. Something out of the ordinary. Filthy. Just to say I’ve done it.”

What’s the craziest thing you HAVE done?

“Oh, I’ve done orgies where I lost count of how many people were there. And I was the only girl on a bus once with a whole band, their manager and a couple of roadies ... I did them all. I kissed Jon Bon Jovi once after I’d given Richie Sambora a blowie. I still had his cum in my mouth. I don’t think Jon expected that.”

In Bristol, Martin and Cathy are in the driveway to welcome us as we park. Karen is all smiles, very matter-of-fact. No shame.

In their living room, Karen chats with Cathy as she removes her blouse to reveal a black bra which is holding back an apparent tidal wave of tittie flesh. Her trousers come off to reveal stockings and suspenders beneath. She removes her casual shoes to remove her trousers, then puts on a pair of slutty black high heels for effect. “I like to look my best.”

She removes her bra and those big boobs travel south fast. They’re not danglers, but they certainly hang low without that bra to support them. She lifts them, one in each hand, and fingers her nipples as she speaks. “I’ve waited a long time for this ... I hope it’s not an anti-climax.”