Chapter 17

“You didn’t take the offer.” Peter was waiting at a small table at the Sub-Way down the street from work. I didn’t want to go back to that coffee shop. I didn’t want to be confused by multiple personality girl. I really didn’t want to make a scene in front of Peter. There’s no such thing as fairies. Die Tinkerbell.

“I have, in writing, proof that I am worth more than my boss pays me,” I said with a broad smile. “He’s stewing over it as I take this meeting. I may have gotten the offer by meeting your daughter, but I’m moving up on my own merit.”

“You sound proud of yourself.” He smiled too. He took a bite of his sandwich. His long suit coat seemed out of place in the fast food restaurant. I was dressed in flannel and dress pants. My job didn’t have much of a dress code.

“You shouldn’t have bought all of that food for my apartment.”

“I should’ve bought an invisible fence and a shock collar for Alexa.” He smirked. “Installed it in your doorway.”

“I doubt that’d stop her,” I said.

“I know it wouldn’t.” He wiped his mouth. A bell jingled as the door opened. “And there’s the last of our little band. If you’re going to get lunch, I’d get in line with Wayne.”

I saw the chubby giant white-haired man come in wearing a puffy coat hung open over a sweater vest. He nodded to Peter and headed over to the line.

“Uh...”

“Call him ‘Doctor Carlsen’ if you want to stroke his ego a bit,” he said. “Though he’s probably as ambivalent about that as anyone.”

“Oh.” I frowned. I wasn’t unprepared as I had been when I had first met Peter. Wayne Carlsen was Max’s father. I didn’t see the resemblance. Perhaps the height -- Max was tall for a woman, but Wayne must’ve been 6’6’’. Great, I wasn’t used to being the short man in a conversation.

“Hello, Doctor Carlsen,” I said.

“Oh? You?” He laughed the laugh I had heard over the phone. “By Peter’s description I expected you to have a bit more of a demonic snatcher-of-babies look to you. Maybe a van with ‘free candy’ spray-painted on the side.”

“Reasonably priced candy,” I corrected. “That last recession hit me hard.”

“Hit us all hard.” He laughed. “My daughter is head over heels, you know?”

“Yeah, scared the crap out of me,” I said. “I was not prepared for a woman that smart or gorgeous to notice me.”

“Then you shouldn’t go around playing hero to damsels in distress,” he tutted. “That’s just poor planning on your part.”

Our conversation stalled as they made our sandwiches. I was not used to other people buying my food. I sat down next to Peter -- Wayne was a little too big.

“You were right, Wayne. Took the deal straight to his boss, and is swinging for a raise and promotion while we eat,” Peter said after they shared the direct manly greeting of wordless nods.

“Yeah, you weren’t offering near enough to move a man hundreds of kilometers from an affectionate Alexa,” Wayne replied. “She wants him close by.”

I frowned in agreement.

“Yeah, and she wouldn’t have been happy with me,” Peter said, and leaned towards Wayne with a calculated smile. “You know how close they like to get.”

“Don’t,” Wayne said with a laugh. “That fishhooks Joker thing is kinda cute when our girls do it. Touch my face, Peter, and I’m having finger sandwiches. Get it, Gene? It’s a pun; we’re in a sandwich shop.”

“Yes, quite clever.” I nodded politely. I felt like I was in the garbage compactor on the Death Star. These men could be the walls. The switch would flip and I’d be crushed and flushed away.

“What is your plan, Gene?” Wayne hairpin-turned the conversation.

He used my name like it was a shot in the dark. I nodded.

“I gotta level up the life I’ve been living. This promotion is the first step. I’m going to need a bigger apartment, to dress better, to be worth more.”

“Small things, goals. Good, you’re not a slouch.” He shook his head. “Not important. You’ve got Maxie and Alex eating out of your hand.”

“And Samantha,” Peter added to the stack like it was gasoline. I took a drink to buy myself a second.

“Maxie’s roommate? I find her frustrating. She keeps most of herself out of reach. I see a few every year. Some girls play dumb, some hide behind yeses to everything, and some retreat from any potential embarrassment. I don’t know which she is, just that something needs to change if I’m ever going to see the real Sam.” Wayne shrugged. “So, three girls, one of you. How’re you going to handle that?”

“Viagra and Red Bull for the first few days, cyanide capsule by the weekend,” Peter said. Wayne and I both stared at him. “Too much? Okay, I guess that was too much. Sorry, Gene, you’ve got me a tiny bit stressed here. Gallows humor, y’know? Gallows over a boiling tank of poisonous sharks.” Peter’s tone told me I was tolerated but not quite welcome yet. That lifted a frightening weight from my shoulders. I took a deep breath.

“Wait,” Wayne scratched his chin. “I think you mean venomous.”

“I did, thank you,” Peter chuckled.

“And boiling? That can’t be right,” I tried.

“No, that’s perfectly fine,” Peter countered.

The silence didn’t go on for as long as I felt it did. I realized I was being waited on.

“They gave me a hard ‘no’ on leaving. I’ve only got one choice: be the best for them.” Wayne looked dubious. “Expect the best from them,” I added. That cheered him up. He laughed.

“I had to push and prod myself,” Peter said.

“You thought he was an underachiever. This close to being a bum,” Wayne said, and shrugged. I frowned.

“I’ve always thought of myself as an underachiever,” I admitted. “This is the first time I’ve pushed for more responsibility, more money, more respect.”

“It’s still a dead-end job. You’re still renting out your time,” Peter said. “You don’t get wealthy as someone’s lackey.”

“No, I get wealthy helping a girl with a twisted ankle during a snowstorm.” I sat up taller. “Real wealthy.”

Wayne’s face darkened. Peter’s expression gave me a moment to clarify. It was not going to be a long moment.

“Wealth isn’t just money,” I pointed out, speaking much faster. “My parents aren’t rich, but I know what it’s like when I head back home. That’s wealthy. Max and Sam might not be as well off as Alex is, but they make me better.”

Wayne and Peter were both clearly taken aback by this statement. They studied me. Wayne and I ate in silence for another minute.

“I think I still want to tell Max to break up with you,” he said after half a sandwich. “You’ve got Alex and Sam chasing after you. She’s going to end up over her head right alongside you.”

Peter laughed. I almost interjected.

“Right. I tell Max that you’re the wrong guy, she won’t just be in over her head, she’ll dive in so deep she’ll crack her head off the bottom of the pool,” Wayne said. “I hate being stuck. So, goddammit, more than anything I want you to make her happy too.”

“I--Yes, that’s what I want,” I said. I needed to take another drink. The pair of them made me several kinds of nervous.

“And, I’m always going to take Max’s side,” he said. “Doctor Carlsen asked that I don’t go full Viking on you yet.”

I must’ve looked confused for a moment.

“Ronni Carlsen’s a GP,” Peter said.

“That’s why he had you call me ‘Doctor,’” Wayne explained, pointing at Peter. “Normally, the Carlsens go with ‘Professor’ and ‘Doctor’ rather than ‘mister’ and ‘missus’.”

“And I can’t pass up a chance to dig at him a little,” Peter said. My phone was ringing again. I went to silence the ringer with an apology.

“It’s, uh, Max,” I said behind a frown.

“Oh, you’re getting that,” Wayne said, and lit up in much the same way his daughter did. I nodded.

“Hey--” I almost greeted her.

“14 hours and 38 minutes!” she bellowed. “And then it begins a noticeable fall-off. Sam said she was right on time with me so we’re going to try again. She’s zipping--”

“Hey Max. I’m with your dad. We’re having lunch,” I said. She managed to stop motormouthing for a second.

“Huh? That’s like a three-hour drive,” she said. “Are you going to be back in town later?”

“He came into the city.”

“How?” Max said. “He doesn’t drive and he’s got class right now?”

“I don’t--”

“Put him on,” she huffed. I frowned.

“She wants to chew you out.” I held the phone out to Wayne. He laughed.

“Hi, honey. If I recall correctly, you should have Physics 2 at this time of day.” He started strong. “Yes, I know I do too. Look--Listen...”

“You got yourself a bit of a ballbreaker with Max, Gene,” Peter grinned. “For your sake, I hope Alex keeps her competitive side in check.”

“Um...”

“Maxie, I’m your Dad and I teach university classes, of course I’m going to say something about you missing class.” He sighed. “Listen, your mother and I are hoping to have you and--What do you mean, ‘no’?”

I frowned.

“It’s dinner. You and Gene and your mother and I. We’re heading back tonight. No, we won’t be here. Because we won’t be staying overnight. Because the forecast isn’t good for tomorrow, I don’t want your mother driving in that. Sweetheart. Maxie? Maxine!”

Peter was laughing in bullyish mirth. I finished my sandwich.

“Maybe I’ll ask Gene and--”

He gave up, shrugged, and handed me the phone.

“--out of nowhere. Gene and me will be busy tonight.”

“Gene and I,” I corrected. She erupted in a squeal.

“Oh my God! Our orders got delivered!”

“What?”

“Wait. Can Dad hear me?”