Chapter 12

FEELING GUILTY}

Dad answered, “Hey Johnny ... we have been following you, things didn’t go well today ... did they?”

“No pop, they didn’t. We partied a little too much last night ... including Jessica.”

“Oh, yeah ... sometimes you need to fight the instinct to revel when you are doing well. You had quite the round yesterday, at least you didn’t lose any ground?” dad said.

“Hey, Daddy ... we’re likely to make both cuts, but we didn’t help ourselves much today, did we?” Cory said.

“Just focus kids, days like this will happen from time to time. As good as you are ... you won’t win everything you enter ... you already know that. Just remember that old song:”

“Just what makes that little old ant,
Think he will move the rubber tree plant,
Everyone knows an ant, can’t
Move that rubber tree plant”

(There was a knock on the door)

“But he’s got High Hopes,”

(I went over and opened it ... it was Mom and Dad, with the phone to his ear)

“He’s got high hopes”

(We all joined in ... as they walked in)

“He’s got high hopes
He’s got ... high apple pie in the sky hopes”

(Mom and Dad)
“So, any time you’re feeling bad
‘Stead of feeling sad
Just remember that ant!”

(All of us sang)
“Oops, there goes another rubber tree
Oops, there goes another rubber tree
Oops, there goes another rubber tree
Plant ... Ker ... plop!”

How many times in the past, Dad would sing this to somebody in the family to get their spirits up?

“Change into some fresh clothes ... We’re taking you two out to dinner,” mom said.

After a quick shower, we’re on our way to the Tap Room, running into many of my peers ... I saw Jessica, by herself. I took the folks over and introduced them to her; Dad was easily in awe of her beauty. She was dressed quite classical, with a scoop top that showed off her best assets.

Dad took her hand and kissed it.

“I see where Johnny gets his savoir faire,” she said to us breaking into her sweet smile.

“Join us, please?” mom asked.

“Thank you, but I am waiting for someone ... maybe another time?” she professed.

Dad took them to another table; I stayed back and sat down with Jess for a moment. “I know that we barely know one another, Miss Alba. Please join us, my father is clearly smitten with your beauty ... as am I.”

She got up, took my arm ... and I led her to our table. “Are you sure you are only twenty? You clearly have the poise and tendencies of a much older man.”

“You bring out the man in me, my dear. You can be discreet, I would hope?” I said quietly.

“Oh, Johnny ... I am really sorry for how I played today,” she said.

“We can always go 30 under tomorrow, and win both the Pro-Am and the Individual. You do realize that your handicap is likely to drop to a ten or eleven when all else is done?”

“Yeah, I know that ... at least I got to play with the kindest player on the PGA Tour,” she said as I added a chair to the table we arrived at.

After dinner, we took Jessica to the Casa Palmero, where she’s staying. I walked her to the lobby, she gave me a kiss ... on the cheek and whispered to me, “After the tournament is over, come back over and we can celebrate some more. Bring your pretty wife ... or not!”

“Pebble in the morning at 10:40am ... see you,” I said, “Get some rest, beautiful!”

She smiled and I went back to the car, seeing a big smile on my Dad’s face. Mom gave him a slap on the shoulder as we got dropped off at The Lodge.

Cory and I got out, and waved goodbye to the folks, who said they were staying at the Hotel Pacific in Monterey.

We took a shared shower, kissing a bit then got in and had a very restful sleep.

The next morning, we got to Pebble Beach at 9am and went through our routine. Jessica arrived, looking fabulous as always. I put her through her paces on the practice range. “OK, the party’s over ... we need to have a great day. Let’s put some distance between us and second place, all right?” I put up my hand for her ... she high-fived me back, saying, “Whatever you want coach ... Jessica is back, and she’s taking no prisoners. ‘No Mercy, Cannon!”

I saw David come up to us with a microphone and a cameraman.

“It appears to this trepid reporter that ‘Team Cannon’ is chomping at the bit. Miss Alba, do you have anything you’d like to say to your legion of fans?”

“My next movie opens on July 31^st ... MACHETE KILLS. Regarding this golf tournament, I have got the best player in golf right now as my partner. Johnny, Cory, and I may be setting some records over the next couple of days. Join ‘Team Cannon!’”

“Johnny, you have got a big lead in the Pro-Am, any plans in particular?” David said.

“You heard the movie star, records are meant to be broken ... aren’t they, Cory?” I asked.

“This tournament is wonderful, but my guy and Jessica have two words for the rest of the players ... No Mercy!” Cory responded.

“You heard that here folks, ‘Team Cannon’ is calling out the rest of the field, back to Frank!”

He threw his microphone at his cameraman, “I am taking the rest of the day off!” he said.

Mom and Dad came by as we were called to report to the first tee.

“The 10:40 tee time is as follows,”

“Johnny Masters’... 20 years old ... the newest and possibly the longest player on the regular tour right now ... winning the PGA Championship last year and winner of all his Presidents Cup Matches!”

I raised my hand, and doffed my VW cap as the crowd shouted.

“His playing partner, the only female in the field this year ... star of the Fantastic Four, the beautiful Jessica Alba!”

Jess broke into that smile that can turn any man to Jell-O, and waved to everybody.

“Also, in this tee time is Peter Gallagher, from the TV shows, the O.C. and Covert Affairs!”

I applauded ... I like Covert Affairs, it’s a good show!

“His playing partner, from the University of Arizona with six wins on the PGA Tour ... is Rory Sabatini!”

He stepped forward, doffing his cap and put out his hand to shake mine. I smiled and shook it. I have been pissed at Rory ever since he denigrated Tiger by saying he was ‘more beatable than ever’ right after Tigers’ family struggles back in 2007. You don’t put down your peers, especially in public. I knew that before my Dad ever told me. His applause was rather weak ... good!

Jess and I were first up. She grabbed her driver and stroked it about 240 to 250 yards ... she came to play! Her technique was getting better all the time.

I got up with my Bertha and stroked it a little over 400 yards and stayed in the fairway.

I heard Peter and Rory both say “Wow!”

We got them right where we want them?

Only Jess got a stroke on this hole. I had a birdie ... the fellows made par.

On the next tee, I hit first ... putting my Bertha at the end of the fairway, just behind the fairway bunker. Jess hit her shot over 230 yards. Peter pounded his Bridgestone ball right between the fairway bunkers on either side of where the fairway narrows. Rory hit it long but found the rough.

Cory went over to Jess, and she hit her four-wood just short of the green. Peter could likely make this green in two. He took what looked like a metal fairway wood and bounced it over the green. I dropped my two-iron on the green, short of the pin by maybe ten feet.

After giving me my putter and a quick kiss, Cory went to help Jess ... only 25 yards short of the green ... from the looks of the shot she hit, it was a pitch and run ... it ended up only two feet away, leaving an uphill putt. Peter recovered nicely with a high pitch that left him with about six feet for his birdie.

After getting out of the rough, Rory had the longest putt of the four of us. With his caddies help, he two-putted for his par. Next, was Peter, who made his birdie ... getting a knowledgeable applause from our crowd.

I putted next and dropped my eagle putt. Jessica didn’t need to hit her putt, but she got up and drained it anyhow ... she did a fist pump that excited the crowd.

Number four, is the first hole with ocean on our right ... with it playing short due to the wind behind us, at the moment. With nine treacherous bunkers, including three surrounding the green, I talked to Jess and Cory.

“Ladies, I’d like to try and drive this green ... what do you say?”

“What club would you use,” Cory asked.

“An easy four-wood ... if I go long or left, it’s no big deal,” I replied.

“Johnny,” Jess said, “Is this for the team or for yourself?”

Surprising question from Ms. Alba?

“If you get on in two and two putt, we have got our birdie ... if I get on and two putt ... it’s still a birdie. If I get close enough, I could get us an eagle,” I reasoned.

“DO IT!” both of them said.

“Cory, my four-wood,” I said ... to be heard.

The crowd went dead quiet. I practice swung a few times, then stepped to my teed up ball. I took an easy swing and it went higher than I’d expected, but landed hard at the front of the green and rolled up to four feet away.

The crowd went very loud for a bit, then the marshals put up their ‘Quiet Please’ paddles and everyone settled.

“That was a helluva shot, Johnny,” Rory said as he approached the teeing area. “I have always wanted to try that, but didn’t quite have the courage.”

Jessica got up and hit her two-iron to just next to the bunker on the left side of the fairway. We gave each other high-fives.

“Go ahead, you are amongst friends here ... mostly,” I said. Rory looked over at me for a moment, then I guess he decided against it. He hit a great shot, dropping it between a couple of fairway bunkers. Peter hit a nice shot barely keeping it on the right side of the fairway.

We got to Jess’ next shot ... she waived Cory off, picked out a club and landed it softly on the left side of the green. I saw her face. She was very satisfied with that shot. We all walked together for a bit, “Nice shot Jess ... Strong the Force is for this One,” I added in my marginally effective Yoda. She laughed, so I got my putter from Cory and walked up ahead.

Peter hit a great shot, landing soft and almost rolling in the hole. Rory pitched a nice shot just past the pin. Cory went up and first looking for anyone to stop her, then pulled the pin and laid it down away from all our putting lines. She went over to help Jess, who had the longest putt. She makes it, and I didn’t have to putt at all!

After looking at it for a while, Cory left her alone as she setup and addressed the putt. We have both impressed upon her the idea of conceptualizing the route of the putt ... she may be doing that.

She hit it ... it had enough speed ... the break looked good, she made it! The crowd went bonkers as Jess smiled at me as she walked over to the pin and took out her ball and kissed it. Cameras were everywhere, I started to pick up my mark, when Cory said, “Don’t!” she walked over and reminded me that I had to finish all my own putts.

Shaken, I put my ball down and walked around a moment. She came back to me and told me the break, stepped away ... I made my eagle. Rory made his par.

The Par-Three, 192-yard fifth hole gave up two pars and two birdies; that was Jess and I!

Hole number six is a 500-Yard Par-Five, and the most difficult hole on the front nine. Jess hit a great drive, close to 250 yards long. I used my four-wood to stay behind the nasty grass about 350 yards out.

Mr. Gallagher hit a nice shot, but it ended up in one of the traps on the left. Rory put his drive right by mine.

Cory grabbed my hand as we walked to the next shot. Jess took out her four-wood and hit a screamer that rolled to just short of the green. Peter tried to pick his ball out of the sand, but only got half way to the green.

Rory was up next five yards behind my ball, we’re both right at 200 yards from the green. He grabbed his two-iron and bounced it up on the green. I took my two-iron and swung it nice and easy, getting it up on the upper tier of the green ... where the pin was today.

I got my putter and walked with Jess on my way to the green. I stopped and watched her lob her ball back to where mine was. I was putting for an eagle; she was putting for a net albatross. We waited for Rory and Peter to finish, both getting birdies.

I had Cory read my putt, and I made it. She went to help Jess, who only had about eight feet from the pin. She dropped her putt, and walked off the green with a very satisfying smile on her face.

The three guys got pars on seven, eight and nine. Jess only bogied number nine, but picked us up a shot with a net birdie. Before leaving for her mid round tinkle, Cory told us that Jess, by herself was net 11 under so far, I was 7 under through nine, and for the tournament

Team Cannon was 51 under, a previously unheard score ... due mostly to Jessica Alba playing like an 8 handicap instead of her official 22.

Jess came up to me and said, “I want to thank you again for all you have done for my game. Cory really found a great guy ... I envy her.”

“Well, to be honest, I envy Cash ... because he gets to see you all of the time, while in a couple of days we will only have memories of this week. Can I kiss you, please?” I said.

“If you don’t, I will kiss you,” she said moving her lips to mine. I knew this could come back to bite me on the ass, but it was really nice. I heard camera’s clicking and Cory came back sometime during it.

“Cory, that was exactly what it looked like ... we were just saying goodbye,” I explained.

Cory grabbed me by the lapels and gave me a quite erotic kiss, apparently remarking her territory. We all walked to the tenth tee, Peter and Rory were watching us.

I expect the picture to be on the next National Enquirer cover.

Rory apparently couldn’t help himself, “Cannon, that was quite the kiss, so was the one between you and your wife.”

I walked up real close so only he’d hear me, “What I do is none of your business. You have done more to hurt the game of golf than any one person, including talking trash about Tiger. Just hit the damn ball!”

On the back nine, Jess and I added to our remarkable score, with her getting par on both Par-Five’s; with our team at 56 under for three complete rounds. I must have shaken Rory more than I thought possible, he shot even par for the back nine and didn’t shake my hand when he was done. Peter came over and said, “You have got quite the game Johnny ... watching you play is watching greatness!”

David walked over, asking the three of us to get tight for an interview.

“56 under after three rounds? I believe that’s a record Johnny,” he remarked.

“Don’t care if it is or not David. Jessica here was 36 under on her own net ball. That’s how you play this game!” I asserted.

“Yes, Cory, how good did this hubby of yours play today?” David asked.

“He missed only two greens today ... another 60, for 14 under on his own for the tournament. With Jessica’s ability to learn quickly ... we have all helped her to improve.”

“Ms. Alba ... although I personally didn’t see it, there’s talk about a rather salacious kiss between you and Cory’s hubby.”

“Was there a question in all of that? I was just thanking him for all the help he gave me, since we met, less than a week ago,” she responded. “You know, I have always enjoyed listening to people with accents...”

Cory and I slipped away as David barely recognized we were gone. Cory cleaned off my lips, and I went into the scorer’s tent with my card, they were talking about our score saying that nobody had ever gotten to 50 under, much less 56!

I smiled, handed them my card and left.

Cory and Jess were right there, waiting for me. Rory walked over to me and said, “Johnny, I am sorry ... I have been impulsive most of my life, quick to anger and never apologizing for my actions. Thanks for getting in my face. For being only 20 ... you sure act grown up!”

“Blame my Dad for that,” I said giving him a slap on the shoulder.

“What was that all about?” Cory asked.

“Don’t worry, it’s all good. Jessica, we come back tomorrow to Pebble Beach again ... we don’t tee off until just after 11am ... see you then!”

“Yes, you will ... Cory, you sure have quite the guy here, anymore of him back in Pahrump?”

“Sorry, Jessica ... they broke the mold first, then they crafted my guy here,” Cory responded.

“Is that your way of saying, that I am damaged merchandise?” I inquired.

They both laughed at my remark, Jess waved goodbye. My eyes may have lingered on her butt for a moment too long, I got a slap on the shoulder from my sister, wife, and lover.

On the way back to the Lodge, I explained to Cory all that had happened. She smiled and leaned into me. I was hungry ... I always am after golf. We both took a quick shower, changed and went back to the Tap Room.

We entered, and I heard Adam’s voice, “Ladies and Gentlemen ... the leader of the Pebble Beach Pro-Am, at an unbelievable 56 under, Mr. and Mrs. Johnny Masters ... He is also leading the Pro side at 14 under!”

There was a mighty sound of hands clapping, including everyone there standing up. I was overwhelmed ... Jack and his wife Barbara, Arnold Palmer and his wife Kathleen ... were all standing and applauding me ... and Cory. I put my hands out to quiet them, someone hit a glass with a spoon and ‘speech’ was heard a few times around the room.

“You heard them, Cannon,” Adam said stepping away, “a few words, please?”

I cleared my throat, Cory held me close and I said, “I don’t deserve that ... all I have done is learn the game that I grew up watching, then playing. My sister was my first caddy ... then I met this woman ... on my arm and I knew I had a chance to compete with the likes of Adam and Tiger, Phil and Bubba. If I make a mark in this sport, my Dad is who deserves all the credit ... Thank you, Thank you all very much.”

They all sat down as Arnold motioned me to come over. “Johnny and Cory, this is my wife Kathleen ... she’s been wanting to meet you since you won the PGA Championship. That day I turned to her and said, ‘Bing Crosby and Bob Hope would have loved him,’ and she agreed. Join us, please ... we just got here ourselves?”

“If you don’t mind,” Cory said.

“Sit ... sit and relax, can I get either of you a drink?” Mr. Palmer said.

“I am only 20 and she’s 19, Sir ... but thanks anyway,” I said.

“You know; I have seen your swing. It reminds me a lot of Tom Weiskopf’s, although he was six foot three. He generated quite the club head speed back in his day, do you know your club head speed, Johnny?” Mr. Palmer asked.

“Well, before my back problem, forced me to slow down, my club speed was measured at one hundred and eighty something mph ... since my rehabilitation, it’s probably down to 115 to 120?” I speculated.

“That’s impressive, young man ... they didn’t have a means to measure back when I was in my prime,” he said modestly.

Cory said, “When you were in your prime, from 1958 to 1964, you won seven majors, Mr. Palmer ... you didn’t need to have your club head speed measured. You, Gary Player, and Jack Nicklaus dominated back then. Since Tiger has been proved human, there is no one dominating golf right now.”

“I beg to differ, young lady ... your husband could be greater than any of the golfers you just mentioned, including yours truly.”

A waiter came up, the Palmers ordered and so did we. It was a most enjoyable dinner with one of my idols. Cory told me quietly that the PGA Championship was the only Major he never won. On their way out, Jack and Barbara came by, “Don’t let Arnie mess with your swing, back in 71 and 72, he kept insisting there was a hitch in my swing ... it drove me crazy. Despite that, I won 3 majors during that time. Good luck to you and Jessica tomorrow!”

After Jack left, I asked Mr. Palmer, “It had to be a blast ... to play with Jack, Lee Trevino, Chi Chi, and Gary Player?”

“It was, but back then we played for the love of the game, it certainly wasn’t for the money. The money these days is through the roof compared to 1954, when I started. The winner won $500. Your Invitational coming up ... what does last place get?”

I deferred to my wife who said, “Well Sir ... there are only 72 players, the golfers who lose the first day will get $100 thousand, the second cut ... they will get $135 thousand, and the third cut $175 thousand. The remaining nine players split just over $8 million, depending on how they finish ... the winner will get $2 million dollars!”

He practically dropped his drink, hearing this. “I need to get my grandson, Sam Saunders in it, ASAP ... is it too late to sign him up?”

Cory pulled her phone out and said, “No Sir, it isn’t ... All he needs is a PGA Tour Card!”

“I don’t know his status exactly, but I will let you know ... How’s that?”

“Wonderful Sir,” I said. “My Dad will be so impressed that I have met and spoken with Arnold Palmer ... as a youngster, he was a pretty good golfer, but he didn’t keep it up. He lives vicariously through me these days.”

We all left together, I got the door for the ladies. We said goodbye and got in our rental. I took a couple of deep breaths before I started the car.

“Are you OK, Johnny?” Cory asked.

“Yeah, that was intense ... meeting Arnold Palmer!” I said.

“He just met Johnny Masters, and he seemed impressed,” Cory said moving over to grab my arm.

“Yeah, but Arnold Palmer ... Wow!” I said as we drove back to the Lodge.

The next day at Pebble Beach, Cory and I arrived ... to a crowd of people wanting our autographs. We did most of them, I didn’t want a hand cramp.

“Hey Guys!” Jessica said rounding the corner and giving me a kiss on the cheek, the same to Cory.

We all went to the practice range together. David and a cameraman were waiting, ostensibly for the three of us.

“Ms. Alba,” he started, “How confident are you today?”

She looked over to me, before she said, “My partner and I have a lead on the field, so I’d be confident in saying ... that somebody has to outplay us today! I have the most capable player as my partner, along with the smartest woman in golf as our caddy.”

David turned to me and asked, “She sounds confident, Johnny ... How do you see the round going today?”

Putting an arm around both ladies’ waists, I said, “With Cory’s brain, and Jessica’s improved swing, we’re going to be hard to beat today David. I have got a lead on the field in the individual event ... I am looking forward to a round in the low 60s.”

“One more question, Johnny ... How are preparations going for your tournament?”

“Well, not to spring too much too soon, but this celebrity format has given me an idea for a future JMI,” I said.

“And what, pray tell is that idea?” David asked.

“We need to practice David, excuse us?” I asserted.

He turned to his cameraman and said, “There you have it, ladies and gentlemen ... a confident team only minutes away from teeing off. Back to Jim in the booth!”

“Johnny, can we follow you ... my cameraman and me?”

I turned to my ladies and asked them, they both nodded OK.

“David, interviews only between holes, not during please?”

“Yeah, I understand Johnny ... thanks!”

We finished our preparations; I got the ladies in close to say a few things that were nobody’s business.

“Jess, the people closest behind us in the team standings, are over ten shots behind. If you can get us ten more under, we can win the Pro-Am. Cory, if you can take care of Jess so I can focus on my personal round, we will get a million dollars for these four days of work. Jess, do you a have a charity that you are playing for today?”

“Geez Johnny ... I never gave that a thought until right now, let me think on that a bit?” she replied.

I slapped them both on the butt and said, “let’s go!”

The team we’re playing with is Dustin Johnson and William Devane; he’s a seven handicap! The pro closest to me in the standings is Phil Mickelson. He’s at 10 under ... I am at 14!

We were all announced, and we had good drives all around. After the front nine, Jess was 8 under net on her own ball while I was 5 under extending my lead over Phil to 9 strokes at 19 under. ‘Team Cannon’ was 66 under with an in surmountable lead. I wasn’t playing especially well, but I was staying in the fairway.

From the ninth green to the tenth tee, David came up, while I was waiting for Cory, and asked, “Do you ever take your foot off the accelerator Johnny?”

“David, back when my Dad was telling me the precepts of golf, he would repeat over and over again, ‘Never let up ... Never look back.’ Right after my sister died, and Cory and I became more than golf friends, I kept hearing that whenever I had a lead over someone else, keep the pressure on” I said feeling very emotional at the moment.

“But, Johnny ... beating these guys as bad as you do, aren’t you worried about what they think of you?”

“David, David ... What I think of myself, is much more important than what anyone thinks of me, except for her!” I said as Cory game back to me. I was on the verge, but Jess and Cory pulled me from David.

To his cameraman, he turned and said, “Folks, that was the most honest and sincere thing I have ever heard from a professional golfer. I told myself, a few years back, when I find the next great golfer, I would retire ... this is David Feherty, Goodbye and God Bless!”

I heard that, he handed his microphone to his cameraman and joined the rest of the crowd following me around.

Jess said to me, “I agree wholeheartedly with what he just said. I have met some first-class ass-holes while both acting and playing golf, but you are exactly what you seem to be ... one helluva guy!”

“And you are quite good yourself, as an actress and as an athlete ... nine holes to victory, go ahead and tee off, Jess,” I said.

We played to our plan, with Jessica adding four more shots to our lead, and I was three under on the back nine, so I won it with 22 under, two better than Phil’s record. Jess and I won with a final 74 under, eclipsing the previous record by double digits. When trophies were being handed out ... I told her that she should go get it.

“Johnny Masters, come on over here,” Jim Nance asked.

I did, and he turned to me and asked, “You have entered three professional golf tournaments and have won them all. What’s your secret?”

I motioned Cory over to me, she broke into a beautiful smile, “She’s the secret ... she knows me better than I know myself. I feel like I have known her my entire life.”

Just then, from the crowd a few bystanders said, ‘Kiss her!’

I took her and snogged her in front of the live crowd and however many people were watching on TV. She came up and took a big breath and sighed, as the crowd applauded.

“Ms. Alba,” Jim Nance said, “Please come on over and talk for a moment?”

She came over and gave Cory a hug, and smiled for the camera, and all the people who love her.

“Before you ask, Johnny and his wife are the reason I played so well this week, they helped my stance, my grip ... everything ... I would have never played so well without ‘The Cannon!’” she said, turning to us and winking.

“What Charity were you playing for this week?” Jim asked.

“I have many charities I have been involved with, but this week it was the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children,” she said.

“I am giving $100k from my winnings to the same charity, Jim ... if it’s good enough for Jessica, It’s good enough for the Masters’!” I said.

Before I knew it, she had her arms around me, and was hugging me.

Jim let that happen, then turned to me, “Speaking of the Masters, Is that the next tournament for you two ... the Masters?”

“No, we will be traveling to Florida for the WGC Cadillac Championship next month. At the Johnny Masters Invitational, there will be a special announcement about the 2013 JMI,” I added.

“Can you give us all a hint, Johnny?” Jim asked.

“I haven’t even talked to my wife about this yet, Jim ... but it has to do with multiple golf tours, and celebrities ... like Jessica here!”

I stepped away from everyone, with Cory on my arm. Jim was still talking to Jess. Cory quietly asked, “What is this great idea of yours?”

“A team of four ... a celebrity, a Champion tour player, an LPGA player and a PGA player ... a Pro-am on the Mon, Tue, and Wed before the JMI starts. A limited field of maybe 30 teams, playing the same Stableford Scoring, with a $3 or $4-million-dollar purse of its own.”

“That’s amazing!” she said.

“What’s amazing?” an Irish voice behind us mimicked.

“Can’t tell you yet, David ... did you really retire today?”