Chapter 312

Thanks to sbrooks103 for this one:

A husband comes home.

“Good news, Honey, I got you some aspirin.”

“But, I don’t have a headache.”

“Okay, let’s fuck!”

dorsetmike ‎provided this one.

A woman is woken up at 4.30 in the morning by some strange noise downstairs.

She tries to wake up her husband, but the other side of the bed is empty.

Rather scared she screams: “Who’s that in our house?”

To her relief it turns out that the cause of the noise is not a burglar, but her husband.

The noise continues for quite some time and the wife shouts down “What the hell are you doing down there?”

The husband replies: “Oh nothing to worry about. I’m just trying to get a cast of beer up the stairs.”

His wife is pretty fed up by now and yells: “For the love of God, will you leave that down there.”

“I can’t”, the husband shouts back... “I’ve drunk it.”