Not This Time - Cover

Not This Time

Copyright© 2016 to Elder Road Books

Chapter 18: Down to Business

“Do you really not know the answer to that, Laura? Or is asking me a habit?” I demanded of my salesperson. She’d been with me nearly since I started sales. She and Rick were about equal in sales and had both earned close to $15,000 in bonuses the past year and a half. That wasn’t bad for part-timers.

“I thought you wanted us to always check with you,” she spluttered. I brought my head up. She was right. It was my problem.

“I’m going to make a transition that means I won’t be as involved in each sale,” I said. “I’ve always been in the middle, but I’ve stayed there too long. I’m going to hire another salesperson to take up the slack that I won’t be doing so I can focus on a marketing strategy for the new units we’ll open this spring. That’s why I’m asking you if you know what to do or if you need to check everything with me.” She breathed a sigh of relief.

“We know what to do. I’m answering for Rick, too. With Renata as efficient on the paperwork as she is, we haven’t had a stalled sale in nine months,” Laura said. “We’ll need that new salesperson to work the evening shift. I don’t really want to stop working the weekends and Rick likes the daytime calls.”

“That’s good input, Laura. Remember that you can always call on me when you need advice or something gets stalled, but routine stuff should just be handled through our process now,” I said. “I plan to be working some regular hours soon and not be on call to do all those evening showings.”


I danced around that one. I even sounded like I had a plan.

The truth was that I just realized I’d been screwing up my business as badly as I was screwing up my relationships. My obsession with making sure everything was perfect on every sale meant that I wasn’t letting anyone else make decisions they were capable of. As a result, they were making my job harder by having to run every little thing past me. I estimated that I had about two months to get everything running smoothly without my micromanaging everything. By the first of February, I needed to be focused on those new units and marketing plan. And my family. It couldn’t wait.

In the meantime, it was damned hard. Laura, Rick, and Renata all tried to pick up the challenge to do it without me, but I’d never let them build up the confidence to take charge. They were nervous and a few errors slipped in. We actually had an offer from a person who failed to qualify for financing. It should never have gotten that far. I just wanted to jump in and wring some necks.

I’d never faced anything like this. In my former life, I’d begun selling real estate. I’d been good at it. But that was all I did. I was a mother and I sold real estate. I’d never managed a business. Suddenly, my low prioritization of my degree came into question. I’d almost convinced myself that I didn’t need to finish school. I already had the business and it was successful. I realized now that it was tenuous. What I was doing was based on my ideals and not on anything practical. I needed more help.

And I didn’t mean just another salesperson.


I had Ben onboard by Christmas and invited the new salesperson to our holiday party. That made one more of us in our little condo.

Jim’s date this year actually seemed almost age appropriate for him. He was well into his forties now, maybe almost fifty. Rebecca was in her late thirties. She still packed her voluptuous body into clothes that were a size too small, but that was a look Jim seemed to like. My own breasts had shrunk a bit when I quit nursing, but they were never going to be the tiny, pert, unused things they’d been in my former life. Nor was I going to try to wear that size bra.

Laura and her husband, Rick and his wife, and Renata and her boyfriend were all happy with the year-end bonuses. Gordon was definitely in his wife’s shadow. Councilwoman Carla had swept into office this fall and was already trying to reform city government. It was a wonder that she was able to be with us for the party, but she said that it was the only night this week she didn’t have something else she had to be at instead. Certainly nothing she wanted to be at. I took that as a compliment.

Ben was a grad student at the U. The party was lively and I guess I was spending a lot of time with Bruce and Emily as I tried to host things because Ben seemed to be spending all his time with Lily. She caught my eye and gave me a pleading look. I hustled over there with Emily in my arms.

“Look here, Emily. Ben hasn’t held you yet. Did you show Ben your Lamb Chop and Charlie Horse?” I asked as I pushed my daughter into his arms. “Ben, do me a quick favor for a couple minutes and occupy her so I can have a minute with my wife. Would you do that for me?” I whispered to him.

“Your…? Oh! I’m… Sure.” He followed Emily, who nearly dragged him to the corner where her stuffed toys were. Everyone else had had the treatment tonight. It would be good for my newest employee.

“Did you really tell him I was your wife?” Lily giggled.

“Yes. And now I’m going to make sure everyone knows it,” I said. I pulled Lily to me and kissed her long and hard. “I love you. Now will you please help me get the next round of appetizers on the table?” Lily squeezed me and I could see a sparkle of tears in her eyes. For that matter, I had a little sparkle myself.


My plans were driven forward when Emily got the croup the second week of January. Lily was deep in student counseling as the winter semester started. Bruce had a midwinter show that he was working on and that left just me to stay home with my daughter.

And, inevitably, I got sick, too.

I couldn’t remember ever having been so sick in my other life and being at home with a miserable toddler left us both in tears a good bit of the time. The only thing that made either of us feel better was long, hot, steamy showers. That foghorn cough we both had eased some in the steam. But a couple of hours later, we’d both be coughing again. The doctor at the University Clinic had given us each a dose of steroids and told us to rest. He also told me that we had different, though related, illnesses and that I might be sick with bronchitis longer than Emily was sick with the croup. I’d need to be careful not to infect her with my brand.

As careful as I tried to be, Emily was clear of the croup for only about a day before she started the symptoms of my chest cold. The doctor put us both on a light dosage of aspirin to keep the fever down and told us to go home and eat chicken soup.

Of course, like with the croup, we were both more comfortable sitting up than lying down, but my poor little girl just wanted to be hugged to my chest with her head pillowed on my breasts. Lily came home at noon each day and fed us soup. She made sure we were as comfortable as possible, but kept her face covered with a surgical mask she’d picked up at the pharmacy. No kissing this girl.

I watched old movies and sitcom reruns from the seventies. If I never heard the word ‘dy-no-mite!’ again it would be too soon. I worried that I was damaging my daughter’s intelligence. But I didn’t have the energy to do anything else.

Bruce managed to get home early every evening and brought food. Neither he nor Lily had the time to stop and cook every night. We’d always shared that responsibility, shifting as each of us had tougher schedules. But Bruce managed to pick a different carry-out almost every evening, discovering that we all liked food he picked up from the Hmong restaurant in Uptown or even the ribs and coleslaw he brought one night from Rudolph’s Barbecue.

But Bruce and Lily slept together in the other room at night to avoid getting infected. I was lonely, but I didn’t think they were even making love with each other for fear of infection.

By the end of the second week of being housebound, both Emily and I were ready to get outside.

That was complicated by the fact that we had ten inches of new snow and the temperature never got above twenty degrees.

Nonetheless, I bundled Emily up in her snowsuit, tucked her in the chest carrier inside my parka, pulled the hood up, and trudged the four blocks to my office.


“Well, if it isn’t the living dead,” Renata said when I came through the door.

“Good morning, Renata,” I moaned.

“It’s afternoon. Go straight to your office. I turned the heat up. Get yourself and Precious unbundled. If it’s too chilly, there’s a blanket on your chair,” she instructed. “When you are all settled, I’ll bring you things to review one at a time. Don’t even think of asking questions until you’ve read all the reports.”

“When did you become the boss?” I asked.

“Was that a question?” she demanded. Then she laughed. “I’ve always been the boss. We just used to hide it from you.” She shooed me into my office and Emily and I got out of our outside clothes quickly. Renata had, indeed, turned up the heat. Emily was happy to get down and run around for a few minutes as she got reacquainted with her office toys.

“I’m ready, boss,” I called out to Renata. She came in immediately with a cup of tea and a stack of papers.

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