Chapter 11

BELFAST – 1995

There was a small note in the slot behind the hotel clerk where his key resided. He was a bit upset because it was just folded over and anyone could read it without any effort. Fortunately, it was from his Legend insurance girl Laura who had recently given him cover before his journey to Belfast.

She was a simple girl and easy to please and her note said it all.

"Danny, I miss you and hope you think of me at times. I am sorry I asked you for too much. Please call me so I know you are at least safe and in good health. Love, Laura"

He considered responding to her but it presented a complication he could not afford at the moment. His role was to support the negotiators without being in the picture. That was difficult enough but even more so now because he knew there were units of the Police Force and the Whitehall military detachments that were still actively searching for him. It made him doubly cautious and leery of taking an unnecessary risk.

Now that he was working on the outside, he could look at the conflict from an outsider's point of view and he saw that the way to peace was still lined with landmines both literally and metaphorically.

Tonight he was meeting Molly at the same pub where they had first had a drink in the midst of unsuspecting young people far too young to know the dangers that lurked all around them. He was old enough to draw the attention of some of the old-timers but no hint of recognition in their piercing eyes. He felt cloaked in a shield of invisibility but still knew the chance of being an innocent bystander was always present.

Molly was a good girl and he had mixed emotions swirling around in his brain that told him she was the one. He sensed that was the true signal and was sorely tempted to do something about it but his ingrained sense of caution stayed his words of commitment and he kept their relationship light and friendly.

He felt a bit of shame over his treatment of Laura as a tool to keep himself safe from discovery and hoped that she would be able to move on to a steady and much more reliable partner than he could ever hope to be. Besides, the conflict was not over yet and there was an awful lot of dying left to do before the bitter end. The hatreds were so strong and the emotions so draining that any chance of happy living was unlikely at present and promised to stay that way into the foreseeable future.

Still, it was relaxing to dream about the possibility and he hoped that the talks would actually produce something that could be built on as a lasting peace. It would be slow going but the hatreds would slowly dissipate providing economic success was part of the mix.

Once the walls and the signs started to come down, the mood of the moment might change and then the healing could begin in earnest. His primary fear was that the need for vengeance was so strong in his people's culture that there would too many cases of "cutting off their nose to spite their face" and the peace would dissolve into a meaningless piece of paper with little or no importance.

Danny had the cash and the handguns that he had carefully stashed so very long ago and he hid them nearby in the hotel basement far enough away to give him deniability but close enough to draw on in a case of emergency.

It had been more than fifteen years since his father had passed away in Long Kesh and he had already visited his grave.

Molly was looking extra pretty sitting quietly in the corner ignoring the sounds of laughter and enthusiastic shouts of celebration over some game just finished hours before. Danny was almost to her side before she saw him coming. He could see her eyes light up with that look that told him she was happy to see him right in front of her. He liked that fact that she was not a devious creature at all but was transparent in her thoughts and emotions totally unlike himself and the people that he interacted with his entire life.

He came to the realization that it was time for him to do something about keeping Molly at his side even though he was a wanted man. It would mean trusting her with his life and telling her the truth about who Danny Hogan really was and why he was constantly on the run.

"Molly, do you think I am the sort of fellow who says what he means or am I like one of those lads who constantly go on about this and that and the other thing and not mean a single thing that comes out of my mouth?"

The pretty girl looked at him and paused to sip her ale before she replied.

"Well, Danny, you impress me as a fairly serious fellow but there is something about you that is not quite right. I can't exactly put me finger on it but I get the feeling that you are hiding something from me and I don't know what it is. I suspect you might have a wife and little kiddies tucked away somewhere that you aren't telling me about but I don't hold that against you because we all have our secrets. There are some things about me that you don't know either."

He sensed that this was a pivotal point in their relationship and wanted to say the right thing and not screw things up beyond repair.