Chapter 15: Harmony and Discipline

"Hello?"

Robert lay on his bed waiting in the darkness of his room for the Guardian to answer. He didn't have to wait long.

"Yes Robert".

"Can you tell me about Jesus?", asked Robert.

"What do you wish to know?"

"Was he real? Was he your son? ... I mean ... can you separate the fact from the fiction?"

"Why is it you wish to know?"

"You know why."

"Yes. But, you need to vocalize it"

Robert sighed internally. In his mind, he could sense that The Guardian wasn't pleased with his impatience. "Okay. I'm sorry. What I want to know is if he really existed and if he did, did he really perform all of those miracles in The Bible?"

There was a small pause. Robert sensed that The Guardian was waiting for him to pontificate further.

"And, if that's all true, I'd like to know how he performed all of those miracles", Robert continued.

"What you mean is that you'd like to know if it is possible for you to perform those same miracles"

Robert thought about how best to answer that and then he realized that The Guardian already knew the answer. "Yes".

"The answer to your first question is yes. Jesus really existed and yes, he really did perform all of those miracles. The answer to your second question, how he performed them is a bit more complicated and involved."

"Was he a demigod like me?"

"No. Not like you"

"How was he different?"

"Jesus was literally my son. By that I mean that he was the product of a physical sexual coupling between his mother, Mary and myself."

"I thought Mary was a virgin"

"She was in the sense that she had never had sexual congress with a man"

"Aren't you a man?"

"Is a butterfly a caterpillar?"

"I see what you mean but the story I was told is different. I mean, based on what I was told before I came here, I don't even see why it was necessary for someone to take the burden of my sins"

"Strictly speaking, it wasn't necessary but it helps the process along tremendously"

"I don't understand"

"It all comes down to harmony"

"I still don't understand."

"The most powerful force in the universe is harmonics, Robert. When energy acts in harmony with other bits of energy, they literally become one. Their power increases exponentially. A single drop of water can't do much by itself but, working in harmony with countless other drops in a wave and you have a tsunami that can wipe out entire islands. A single photon falling on your skin isn't even noticed by you but, if you were to harness that photon and combine it with others operating on the same concentrated wavelength, you have a laser that can cut through steel."

"So how does harmonics figure into someone dying for my sins?"

"People arrive in the next life with the same consciousness that they left with in the previous one. That consciousness is a jumble of energy, some of which does not operate in harmony with the energy needed to move on. The problem is, that energy that's not in harmony needs to be expelled but it is completely ingrained and integrated into the consciousness of the individual trying to expel it. They don't know how. On top of that, when people arrive in the next life, like you, their memories are perfectly intact, they remember every single thing that they've done that was petty and small and selfish"

"You didn't mention evil", said Robert.

"Yes I did. I said selfish"

"Selfish is evil?"

"Evil is just different manifestations of selfishness. There's not an evil act you can name that doesn't have, as its core, a selfish motive. A man rapes a woman because he selfishly wants something she has and he does not care if she wants to give it to him or not. People steal for the same reason. A person commits murder because they selfishly feel that their life would be better if their victim was deprived of his."

"So they remember everything, so what?"

"They need to rid themselves of that which is disharmonious in order to move to the next level. Otherwise, they are damned."

"The other Guardian told me that there was no hell"

"I didn't say, 'hell', I said 'damned'. As in stopped. As in they can progress no further. They need to have a way to feel like they've been forgiven ... a way to slough off that which is disharmonious and move forward. But they feel an almost visceral need to suffer for what they did wrong. Being told that someone has already suffered for them aids them in the process."

"So Jesus didn't really suffer?"

"I didn't say that. The fact is that he suffered very cruelly"

Robert lay there for a moment and tried to digest everything the Guardian was saying.

"Am I being selfish when I had the kind of sex I had with Mathilda?"

"Actually, you gave Mathilda precisely what she desired most. It was carnal in its nature to be sure but it was not selfish."

"Why does she want to be my slave?"

"Several reasons but they all boil down to her feeling safe. Mathilda has a couple of things working for her in that respect. There were your pheromones, of course, but that merely started things in motion. Mathilda is a consciousness that is naturally drawn to a consciousness that is more organized and operating on a higher level than she is. We will discuss more of that in a bit but Mathilda is also a hyper sexual being. Her body craves sex and she was conditioned, as a child, to feel that when she is in a slave/master relationship she is free to enjoy the act of sex with no restraints and no guilt. In fact, there is one other person in your life now who has, essentially, the same needs regarding sex."

"Excuse me?"

"Someone who has denied their desires for far too long because of conditioning that they received as a child."

The image of Katherine Koch flashed in Robert's mind and his eyes snapped open. He could sense the Guardian, for lack of a better word, chuckling.

"Mrs. Koch?"

"As Katherine was just becoming a woman, her father took advantage of her and convinced her to have sex with him"

Robert felt a mixture of anger and revulsion. "How old was she?"

"She was twelve"

Robert's anger burned brighter. The Guardian continued, "Although it was, what society calls rape, Katherine willingly and eagerly made the choice to have sex with her father and, until it was discovered, she enjoyed it immensely. After it was discovered, Katherine's mother blamed her and abused her for years afterwards.That only cemented things as they are now."

As the Guardian spoke, the scene he was describing flashed inside Robert's mind as if he were viewing a movie. Robert could see the mother, in a seeming attempt to ascertain all that has taken place, ask more and more probing questions which Katherine, believing her mother to be concerned about her welfare, answered truthfully. She told her mother how her father had crept into her bedroom every night. She woke up the first night with him kissing her and feeling his strong hands on her pushing up her nightgown and his fingers entering her body. At first she was frightened and then the fear morphed into excitement and joy ... and finally, immeasurable pleasure. The father she idolized from afar, the man who was always away on business or at the office was taking time to be with her! Her father was a man's man, a pillar in the community. A titan of business that commanded respect and awe from everyone with whom he came in contact and Katherine was no exception ... and here he was finally paying attention to her!

He was strong and firm but also patient and gentle. In a voice that was much quieter and subdued than she was accustomed to, he explained to Katherine that these moments were to be kept strictly between them. It was to be a secret that only the two of them shared.

Katherine's father patiently taught her how to pleasure him with her hands and with her mouth and, eventually, with the other two orifices in her body. When he entered her the first time, it hurt but her father explained that it was her duty to do these things for him and, if she truly loved him and wanted him to be happy, she would do these things for him. He worked so hard and so tirelessly for the family and all he asked in return was for their devotion and respect and love. How could she deny it to him?

And Katherine came to view it exactly like that, as the ultimate act of love to give oneself completely and utterly. It was her duty and her privilege to give up herself to the strong male in her life. And it seemed that the more fully and completely she surrendered herself, the more fulfilled and the greater joy she felt and the greater physical pleasure it brought to her. Any demand her father made was willingly accepted. In fact, she began to crave the commands as a way to show her love and subservience to him. It was only natural that she serve him in any way he demanded.

Then one night her mother had gone to bed a little less inebriated than was customary and awoke to the passionate groans coming from her nubile daughter's bedroom. Stumbling into the room, she snapped on the light only to see her husband sitting on the bed with his head thrown back and eyes closed in obvious pleasure while her twelve year old daughter worshiped his engorged prick with her mouth ... both of them moaning in sexual bliss. The scene was especially painful for her as she recognized that her daughter was doing something for her father that Katherine's mother had repeatedly denied to her husband as an act beneath her dignity.

The screaming and subsequent tantrum awakened the entire household staff, including a much younger Mae who arrived just in time to see the father emerge from Katherine's bedroom with his pants clutched in one hand and the rest of his clothing in the other. A shoe sailed from the bedroom door followed by screams and curses from the drunken matron of the manor.

The father scurried out the front door and his car could be heard starting up and driving away leaving Katherine alone to bear the brunt of her mother's wrath. She would have likely killed her daughter in her drunken rage had not Mae intervened, throwing herself over the weeping child and taking most of the blows upon herself.

Katherine's mother went to bed that night attempting to drink herself into oblivion. Her last thought before slipping into unconsciousness was that all this was somehow her fault. That, by denying her husband's requests, he had wandered and strayed. It couldn't be his fault. He was a man to be admired. It had to be that her whore of a daughter had, somehow, tempted him. Katherine's mother drained the rest of the whiskey from her glass and resolved to get her husband back. But first, she would find out how her slutty daughter had enticed him.

A day or two later, the mother, now calm and collected, sat down with her daughter and began to draw out the sordid tale. While outwardly calm, Katherine's mother was seething with barely contained rage and every new revelation of every sleazy act increased that rage. When Katherine described her father ejaculating into her mouth, the mother saw Katherine shudder in, what she presumed, was a moment of revulsion. It was only after the shudder, when she saw a hint of a satisfied smile on Katherine's face that she realized her slut of a daughter had actually orgasmed from just the memory of the event!. And that is when the rage boiled over and all reason flew out the window.

While Katherine recovered from the beating, the overriding emotion and thought that she had was that she was not to be trusted with her sexuality. Hormones, however, are not to be denied. They would build up for weeks. And each time she felt their influence, Katherine would remind herself that she was a slut and a whore and that she couldn't succumb, even a little bit.

But, of course she would succumb. She always did and she always punished herself for it; physically, slapping her face or beating her bare thighs and bottom with a stiff hair brush and calling herself the same things her mother called her every day until she left for college. She hated that she was weak. And the thing that scared her most of all was the fact that everything about it only made her more and more excited. She knew that she needed the release that her body demanded. But, along with that, she knew that she needed to be called those names and to be punished for being such a slut. And the realization of those needs scared her into donning the mask that she wore every day. The ice queen who was above all things sexual. Because, the man who knew what she really was could easily own her body and soul. She recalled how close she had come to allowing Ben's father to have her. Twenty years later, she still trembled at the fantasy of surrendering herself completely and utterly to the sexual desires and whims of that man. She roughly shoved the handle of the hair brush into her sopping wet sex as she imagined that man ploughing into her, using her to sate his lusts and telling her what a slut she was and how she should be punished for being such a whore. She never succumbed though because she knew that, once she gave in, she would do for him whatever and whenever he demanded. And, if Katherine knew anything, she knew that it was the rare man who could be trusted with such power over her, and the senior Mr. Koch was not such a man.