Jokes and Giggles
Chapter 780

Copyright© 2015 by Jack Spratt

This one is compliments of Pepere

The wife came home early and found her husband in their bedroom making love to a very attractive young woman. And let’s just say that she was extremely pissed off!

“You are a disrespectful pig!” she cried. “How dare you do this to me –faithful wife, the mother of your children? I’m leaving you. I want a divorce!” And the husband replied “Hang on just a minute, Love, so at least I can tell you what happened.”

“Fine, go ahead,” she sobbed, “But they’ll be the last words you’ll say to me!” And so the husband began — “Well, I was getting into the car to drive home and this young lady here asked me for a lift. She looked so down and out and defenseless that I took pity on her and let her into the car. I noticed that she was very thin, not well-dressed, and very dirty. She told me that she hadn’t eaten for three days! So, in my compassion, I brought her home and warmed up the enchiladas I made for you last night, the ones you wouldn’t eat because you’re afraid that you’ll put on weight. The poor thing devoured them in moments.”

“Since she needed a good clean up I suggested a shower, and while she was doing that I noticed her clothes were dirty and full of holes, so I threw them away. Then, as she needed clothes, I gave her the designer jeans that you have had for a few years, but don’t use because you say they are too tight.”

“I also gave her the underwear that was your anniversary present, which you don’t use because I don’t have good taste. I found the sexy blouse my sister gave you for Christmas that you don’t use just to annoy her, and I also donated those boots you bought at the expensive boutique and don’t use because someone at work has a pair of the same.”

The husband took a quick breath and continued – “She was so grateful for my understanding and help and she turned to me with tears in her eyes as I walked her to the door, and said ‘Please ... do you have anything else that your wife doesn’t use?’”

 
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