Jokes and Giggles
Copyright© 2015 by Jack Spratt
Two Islamic terrorists are in a locker room taking a shower after their bomb making class, when one notices the other has a huge cork stuck in his butt. "If you do not mind me saying," said the second terrorist, "that cork looks very uncomfortable. Why do you not take it out?"
"I regret I cannot," lamented the first terrorist. "It is permanently stuck in my butt."
"I do not understand," said the other.
The first terrorist says, "I was walking along the beach and I tripped over an oil lamp. There was a puff of smoke, and then a huge old man in an American flag with a white beard and top hat came boiling out. He said, "I am Uncle Sam, the Genie. I can grant you one wish."
I said, "No shit?"
This one is compliments of mike
Lawyers should never ask a Georgia grandma a question if they aren't prepared for the answer.
In a trial, a Southern small-town prosecuting attorney called his first witness, a grandmotherly, elderly woman to the stand. He approached her and asked, 'Mrs. Jones, do you know me?'