Jokes and Giggles
Chapter 149

Copyright© 2015 by Jack Spratt

At the National Art Gallery in Dublin, a husband and wife from America were staring at a portrait that had them completely confused.

The painting depicted 3 black men totally naked, sitting on a bench.

Two of the figures had black penises, but the one in the middle had a pink penis.

The curator of the gallery realized that they were having trouble interpreting the painting and offered his personal assessment.

He went on for over half an hour explaining how it depicted the sexual emasculation of African Americans

in a predominately white, patriarchal society.

'In fact', he pointed out, 'some serious critics believe that the pink penis also reflects the cultural and sociological oppression experienced by gay men in contemporary society'.

After the curator left, an Irishman approached the couple and said, 'Would you like to know what the painting is really about?'

'Now why would you claim to be more of an expert than the curator of the gallery, ' asked the couple?

'Because I am the artist, who painted the picture, ' he replied.

'In fact, there are no African Americans depicted at all. They're just three Irish coal miners.

The guy in the middle went home for lunch.'


Nail on the 2 x 4

A blonde city girl named DORIS marries a Saskatchewan rancher. One morning, on his way out to check on the cows,

the rancher says to DORIS "The insemination man is coming over to impregnate one of our cows, so I drove a nail

into the 2x4 just above where the cow's stall is in the barn. Please show him where the cow is when he gets here, OK?"

The rancher leaves for the fields.

After a while, the artificial insemination man arrives and knocks on the front door.

"I came to inseminate the cow," he said. DORIS takes him down to the barn.

They walk along the row of cows, and when DORIS sees the nail, she tells him,

"This is the one right here."

The man, assuming he is dealing with an airhead blonde, asks, "Tell me, lady, 'cause I'm dying to know.

How would YOU know that this is the right cow to be bred?"

"That's simple," she said. "By the nail that's over its stall," she explains very confidently.

Laughing rudely at her, the man says, "And what, pray tell, is the nail for?"

The blonde turns to walk away and says sweetly over her shoulder, "I guess it's to hang your pants on," she replied

 
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