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Sci Fi story idea - comments wanted

limnophile75044 ๐Ÿšซ

I had an idea for a new story I'd like to write.

Imagine a far future where humans live 1,000 years and look 20-ish for several centuries. Children get reversible sterilization and a sexual desire suppressant until they finish their PhD-level educations at about age 25. After that, parents teach them about sex and help them practice until they reach full legal maturity at 40 years' old.

A 'young' woman leaves home and meets a handsome stranger. They fall in love, only to find out he is her great-great grandfather.

The above is legally and socially okay, since all pregnancies are planned, and genetic screening and embryo implantation prevent any health problems caused by incest.

-

Do you know of any stories like this? If not, do you think it would make a good story?

Redsliver ๐Ÿšซ

@limnophile75044

Dystopic? Sounds like it could be an excellent horror story. Have the girl slowly realize everything about her was predesigned to fit the carefully crafted fantasy of her great-great-grandfather, and build to learn her growing senses of disgust, self-doubt, identity crisis, and inhumanity are not bugs in her code but features of Grandpa's fantasy.

And then her carefully managed birth control fails.

Utopic? What's the conflict? A story is: Someone wants something, but is having trouble getting it. I don't know that there's a positive story to be found here.

Replies:   StarFleet Carl
StarFleet Carl ๐Ÿšซ

@Redsliver

her carefully managed birth control fails

Parent - 50%
Grandparent - 25%
Great-grandparent - 12.5% - same as a first cousin
Great-great-grandparent - 6.25% - same as a second cousin

So, there's no real genetic risk for children. As for being horror, that's doubtful. It'd be more like she reminded him of her own great-great-grandmother, who died in a tragic accident. Then it becomes a romance because, while she realizes why he's attracted to her physically, he has to learn how to adjust to her because she's not emotionally, socially, or mentally the person she looks like.

While I haven't done a lot of describing the culture and relationships on Star Home, I do have Cal casually mention that it was difficult to relate to his sister, as she was 90 years older than him.

Redsliver ๐Ÿšซ

@StarFleet Carl

Your romance plot could work, it's a small conflict - how do I see past the face I once knew to the new woman underneath - but that's more than enough for a romance.

I still think dystopic is the way to go. The very idea of a complete regimented society as limnophile described is very Brave New World by Aldous Huxley. Broken world, broken people. Throw in the personal with her descent into despair being planned out from the get-go, it becomes an amazing horror story.

The genetic point is moot. The fact that there's a whiff of incest is enough to raise hackles in the reader. The secondary, or primary issue depending on the writer, of the pregnancy is the girl losing the any imagination of control. Her life, mind, emotions, and future are all parts of his game. What does that mean for their child?

Replies:   StarFleet Carl
StarFleet Carl ๐Ÿšซ

@Redsliver

The very idea of a complete regimented society as limnophile described

I don't see it as a regimented society from his description. I see it as a society that has taken changed morally to deal with the consequences of lifespans that measure in centuries instead of decades.

there's a whiff of incest

Um, re-read the premise. It's not a whiff - it's a full blown spray like from the back of a skunk.

parents teach them about sex and help them practice

Replies:   Redsliver
Redsliver ๐Ÿšซ

@StarFleet Carl

I don't see it as a regimented society from his description. I see it as a society that has taken changed morally to deal with the consequences of lifespans that measure in centuries instead of decades.

I disagree. I find his society dystopic and terrifying. The top down prescriptions as opposed to a distributed bottom up system is in all contemporary parallels: tyranny. Even if the future is enlightened not oppressive, the author would still need to sell that to a contemporary reader. His description favors horror story to me.

Um, re-read the premise. It's not a whiff - it's a full blown spray like from the back of a skunk.

Fair, poor communication on my part. I used the phrase "Whiff of incest" because that's all it takes to trigger the disgust reaction not because that was what he set on the t-ball stand before asking us to swing at it. Add that procreation in my idea was between the 6% matchup, the other defined incest wasn't part of the bad end climax. Does she forgive her parents for having her because they might have been GGGP's puppets too? But you're right, there's a much bigger sense of disconnect between the mores of this future and the likely reader of the story. I think that's a bigger reason for dystopic horror over utopic romance.

Like I said, the romantic conflict you suggested works too. To me, his description and setting are the bases for an amazing psychological horror show.

awnlee jawking ๐Ÿšซ

@StarFleet Carl

Great-great-grandparent - 6.25% - same as a second cousin

And GPs in places like Birmingham know full well the effects of second-cousin marriages :-(

AJ

Remus2 ๐Ÿšซ
Updated:

@limnophile75044

Unless it's just to relate equivalency, the PhD education level is a bit incongruous with the theme. You put it at 25 years old, which is more in line with current norms, not a world where people live for 1,000 years plus. In the US, life expectancy is currently 79 years.

The current age range for a PhD is ~26-30 years old. 25 is a touch aggressive today. 25 years is about ~32% of current life expectancy.

At 1,000 year life expectancy 25 is 2.5%.

That appears arbitrary at best. With 1,000 years to live, I can't see the need to rush.

You'll need to explain the social differences between then and now.

Then there is the method of education. Sleep learning is something I've seen many times in science fiction. The Krell intellect enhancer from "Forbidden Planet" being an early interation of the idea.

A dystopian future is probably the best handwavium to use for your story setup.

Replies:   richardshagrin
richardshagrin ๐Ÿšซ

@Remus2

handwavium

If your metal needs to be radio active (and your radio needs radiation) I suggest you use Plutonium which is named for Micky Mouse's dog pet, Pluto. Not the planet, although it and Uranium which was named for Uranus the planet, not your anus, seem to have similar planetary origins.

Replies:   awnlee jawking
awnlee jawking ๐Ÿšซ

@richardshagrin

Uranus the planet, not your anus

That's the British pronunciation.

The Murican pronunciation is urinous, after your urine.

AJ

Dominions Son ๐Ÿšซ

@awnlee jawking

The Murican pronunciation is urinous, after your urine.

It's a Republican plot (GO P)

StarFleet Carl ๐Ÿšซ

@awnlee jawking

The Murican pronunciation is urinous, after your urine.

The funny part is, it wasn't, until NASA sent a rocket mission there and Dan Rather found out he was going to have to read about a probe of Uranus on national television.

Of course, Anderson Cooper was all excited about it, at least until he found out the were talking about outer space, not inner sphincterdom.

limnophile75044 ๐Ÿšซ

@limnophile75044

Thanks everyone, for the insights and advice.

I'm thinking I'll make the young woman MC and her great-great-grandfather part of a much larger sci-fi adventure story. G-G-gramps is one of the first 'immortals', in love with her but morally conflicted when they discover their relation. Younger people have adapted to incest being normal and most are fine with it. As what seems like a minor bit of background, they hear news that a 'super-do-hickey' (haven't decided on type of device - tiny and nearly free power source? wormhole generator? ultimate weapon?) has been invented and a technician disappeared with the prototype and only copy of the plans. Eventually G-G-gramps decides he can't stand the guilt anymore and leaves her for another hottie he's not related to. (MC looks 21 and G-G-Gramps looks 23 if that matters.)

She finds a new boyfriend who was practically a sex slave to his widowed mother until he ran away. His submissive personality allows her to get out the pain and anger at being abandoned by spanking him, etc. They have a chance encounter with a hot couple who happen to be the 'super-do-hickey' thief and her husband/uncle. The group flee from world to world trying to find a safe way to sell it as they experience many strange settings and societies. In the year 4,500 humanity would have spread to thousands of other planets. On worlds that are densely populated people are only allowed to have one child, plus an extra one or two as rewards if they do something great. On freshly settled planets, they can have as many as they like. Some small new societies would even give a reward for having lots of kids.

In the setting I'm imagining people are physically mature at about 18-19 like the real world. They are reversibly sterilized and given sexual desire inhibitors as young children, and at 20 they get a treatment which greatly slows aging. They start looking 30-ish at 400 years old and gradually lose their ability to reproduce once middle-age sets in around 800. Many decide they've lived long enough and agree to euthanasia before reaching maximum longevity at 1,200.

On most worlds, parents have custody of their children until they are 40 and teach them sex from age 25 to 40. A special area of each community is reserved for schools, universities, and families with children. For safety's sake, only people 25 or older are allowed to leave the 'nest' neighborhood. Regaining fertility only requires a short doctor visit once they reach 40.

The idea that people aren't allowed to even think about sex until they are 25 or marry before they are 40 is based on the rules of some restrictive websites, not SOL. With anybody under 25 safely confined to school or home, the rest of the world can do whatever they want, wherever they want. This frees up the possibility of outdoor orgies in public parks, horny couples screwing leaned against a building downtown or on city transit, nude bicycle or foot races, advertising billboards with product names around a screen that plays porn... pick your favorite Voyeur/Exhib fantasy.

It also makes 'age room' to include a planet where a rebellious religious group arranges marriages for their children at the shockingly young and illegal age of only 21.

I expect it to be a very long story, probably 100k words or more, so I doubt I'll publish it next month. LOL

Thanks again!

Any other advice / suggestions?

Redsliver ๐Ÿšซ

@limnophile75044

Can you boil the plot down to a one or two sentence logline? My eyes glazed over reading the details.

Someone wants something, but it is having trouble getting it.

He's a, she's a, they fight crime is usually the way to go for a romance.

Something like:

He's the first in a line of immortals with morals tied back to a simpler time, she's his fifth generation descendent who only ever knew a world beyond incest taboos, can she break through his pregenic hangups and show him all you really need is love?

Pregenic being the in universe word I made up to mean "before the immortals". It shows of the world's scifi elements over some sort of magic immortality elements without requiring the new reader to have knowledge of your universe to get intrigued.

Replies:   limnophile75044
limnophile75044 ๐Ÿšซ
Updated:

@Redsliver

On reconsideration, the extended lifespan and incest angst aren't really the core of the story, more like interesting hooks or sub-plots.

New summary:
In the far future two male/female couples with strange and incesty histories meet for a foursome and decide to stay together. One of the women has stolen an extremely dangerous and valuable techno-gadget. The four flee corrupt authorities from planet to planet trying to sell it to somebody trustworthy, encountering many strange settings and societies.

Redsliver ๐Ÿšซ

@limnophile75044

A heist and a chase? That's intriguing. Good luck with it.

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