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Lava Lava, Puka Puka by rlfj

jr88

I had rlfj's newest story, "Lava Lava, Puka Puka" bookmarked and the link now appears to lead to a story called "A New Arrangement" by QM. Does anyone know what happened?

storiesonline.net/s/14973/lava-lava-puka-puka

Replies:   Ernest Bywater  Gauthier  rlfj
Ernest Bywater

@jr88

when did you make the link - there's no story of that name on rlfj's story list

Gauthier

@jr88

2017-01-04 21:48:44 Deleted at author's request

I guess rlfj was not happy with the scoring:
https://storiesonline.net/library/authorBlog.php?id=850

That's too bad, I liked it.

Replies:   Vlad_Inhaler
Ernest Bywater

just checked the removed stories list and it was removed at author's request on 4 Jan 2017 at 21:48 hours -

Ernest Bywater

his last blog entry on Jan 2 shows he wasn't happy with the feedback and scores on it.

Replies:   awnlee jawking
Vlad_Inhaler

@Gauthier

Email him and tell him you liked it. Be very very polite, of course.

Replies:   Gauthier
Gauthier

@Vlad_Inhaler

Done, and I sent him a few bucks to rlfj1234@gmail.com

awnlee jawking

@Ernest Bywater

I don't think it had a fair chance. The story proper had barely started. The first two chapters could easily be mistaken for a middle-aged stroke story.

AJ

Replies:   Ernest Bywater
Ernest Bywater

@awnlee jawking

I don't think it had a fair chance. The story proper had barely started. The first two chapters could easily be mistaken for a middle-aged stroke story.


Could be, I didn't read, because I don't usually look at a story written by another until after it's all finished posting. From the blog I gather he may have it finished , it's not clear, so anyone interested could email him for a copy of what he does have.

Replies:   Gauthier
Gauthier

@Ernest Bywater

Well there is an Epilogue and the last words are "The End!"

As for the score, as he said, it's not his usual fare. I'm not really surprises his usual readers have been scoring punitively, which considering the good quality of the writing and the effort he put into it is really unfair.

He'll repost it soon...

Replies:   jr88
jr88

@Gauthier

He'll repost it soon...


That's good. I was really interested in seeing where it was going before he removed it.

Oyster
Updated:

Haven't read most of rlfj's stories (just three, guess which ones) as the others just did not interest me (description did not pique my interest or the tags made me look past them), but what I read I liked and voted accordingly.

Still, his comments in his latest blog just made me shake my head. He did not like people voting in the range of "not bad" or "good" after just two chapters, really? Those comments were a disservice and an insult to all authors who post stories that get votes in that range.

To clarify this is the quote I was referring to, directly from his blog:
(Sorry if that sounds like self-pity, but a rating in the 6s? That's what you get for stories from teenagers lying about their age and writing illiterate rape fetishes!)

Replies:   Crumbly Writer
Crumbly Writer

@Oyster

Still, his comments in his latest blog just made me shake my head. He did not like people voting in the range of "not bad" or "good" after just two chapters, really? Those comments were a disservice and an insult to all authors who post stories that get votes in that range.

You also need to be cautious about opening chapters. Nothing sells a story like the first sentence/paragraph/page/chapter. If it doesn't work, readers will never get any farther. If the scores on the opening chapter are off, authors should pull the story, and attempt to fix what they hadn't anticipated. If you don't have a strong start, often you shouldn't even begin a story. (Note: that's said by someone who typically starts stories with a very slow start.)

rlfj

@jr88

Reposting tonight. See the blog then. Thanks.

- rlfj

awnlee jawking

@rlfj

The new description seems to downplay the scientific angle, making the story less attractive in my eyes. Which just goes to show that some readers are never satisfied!

AJ

bukkybrown5

I am no good writer but that was a step down from his standards

sejintenej

@rlfj

Reposting tonight. See the blog then. Thanks.

Waiting to see. First time I couldn't see where it was going but one could say the same about the first two chapters of Island Delight which I am still reading.

Replies:   Bondi Beach
Bondi Beach

@sejintenej

Waiting to see. First time I couldn't see where it was going


rlfj wil probably pull a fast one but right now the course seems pretty clear and I'm aboard for the ride:

1 Tropical island; hot and wet
2 Little or no clothing worn (See 1, above)
3 Horny young people
4 Orchids that give off eau de pussy and look like same
5 Horny older couples; horny single academic

Yup. Go for it, I say.

bb

Replies:   awnlee jawking
awnlee jawking

@Bondi Beach

4 Orchids that give off eau de pussy and look like same


Orchids that smell of fish! I wonder what pollinates them ;)

AJ

Replies:   Harold Wilson
Harold Wilson

@awnlee jawking

Cats, obviously.

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