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After six years of being the target of bullies in school, I finally knocked one on his but with a couple of missing teeth. Never had a problem with any of the bullies after that.

That works if you are anywhere near as physically capable as they are.

For me, fighting back just added to the amusement value, as I had no skills in that area, and they outweighed me by rather a bit, and none of it fat.

I didn't rat them out, my parents did. Didn't have much impact in public school, but at the private high school I attended, they were invited to not come back the following year; there were other infractions on their part that pushed it over the line, ultimately, but bullying me definitely contributed to the end result. It did not reflect the character that the school was attempting to instill.

Given that I was on financial aid, and their parents were paying full tuition, principle was involved. It's a pity that one of them had a sister who chose to not come back after that year, she was so embarassed by her brother's behaviour; she was good people, and I will admit to occassionally wondering whatever became of her. Her brother, not so much.

I did run into his sidekick several years later, and it appeared that not being allowed back had served as something of a wakeup call in his case; he was quite civil, and seemed genuinely interested in how I'd been getting on.

Actually, the few others who had bullied me who I came across in later years all seemed to have straightened themselves out in the end, which I was glad to find out.

That works if you are anywhere near as physically capable as they are.

Not so. The bullies in my case were all members of the various athletic groups where the closest I came to athletics was being in the marching band sharing the same field.

In my situation, it was a matter of being put in a position where I could not avoid them. Even a mouse cornered by a cat will fight.

Even a mouse cornered by a cat will fight.

You were successful in besting them physically, so they left you alone in the future. It wasn't a safe amusement anymore.

I wasn't successful, so it just increased their enjoyment, my futilely struggling with them. It was hilarious, from their perspective. And a real power rush; they were eighth graders, and I was a freshman; middle schoolers dominating a high schooler, oh such a heady sensation!

I couldn't avoid them; I was in a one hour each way carpool with them every school day for nine months; there were six of us from Salem, Oregon, attending Catlin Gabel School in Portland, Oregon, that year [1975-1976], so the parents organized a carpool.

So there was no way I could bypass them. I still can't believe their sticking chewing gum in my hair while my father was driving; he really lit into them, but it didn't faze them any. I think it actually added to their enjoyment. If he did anything physical to them, he'd have gone to jail; words didn't have any impact.

There was definitely a class component involved; they were wealthy doctor's sons, while my father was a self-employed bookkeeper and my mother a social worker. Dad was the first member of his family to attend college [he had a Masters degree], and I think the first generation that completed high school. I think they were insulted to have to associate with me for two hours a day; their parents were not that way at all, so I don't know where they got that attitude.

sunkuwan: On the whole, it wasn't that bad, really. For a couple of years in Junior High I got hassled a lot, but no actual violence. The year I just described was by far the worst. And it was also the last; no one bullied me after that. I'm still in contact with many of my classmates from High School.

There had been one kid earlier on who sought me out whenever he saw me to whale on me, but he thought that I'd beaten up his sister; it wasn't me, but I understood where he was coming from. The last time I saw him he appeared to have realized it hadn't been me, and was quite friendly. That wasn't a case of bullying, from my perspective; I quite agreed that if I'd done what he thought I'd done, he was justified; it's just that I was innocent. So I never felt any animosity towards him, just tried to avoid him out of self-preservation.

he really lit into them, but it didn't faze them any. I think it actually added to their enjoyment. If he did anything physical to them, he'd have gone to jail; words didn't have any impact.

I made the mistake of running from bullies in view of my father. He lit int ME for running and gave me the option of fighting the bully or him. My dad was over 6'3 so I went for the smaller target. The bully's father tried to intervene but was stopped by MY father. The fathers ended up talking while us boys fought.

For a couple of years in Junior High I got hassled a lot, but no actual violence.

See, there's a difference. In my case, the bullying was physical. 'gum in the hair' is little kid stuff. Going home with bruises is what I'm talking about. They KNEW I wouldn't fight back... until I did. The leader, his 'gang', and a couple of their friends got me surrounded and started in on me. I had no choice but to defend myself. NOBODY saw me hit him. HE ended up flat on his ass. I had a sore hand and no more problems with them.

Not so. The bullies in my case were all members of the various athletic groups where the closest I came to athletics was being in the marching band sharing the same field.

See my previous post on this. The Jocks LOVED the band program in my high school, if only because of the pep band turning up at football and basketball games. Rather than being targets for victimization by the jocks. We were more likely to be targets of protection by the jocks when it came to that stuff.

But then even according to our teachers at the time, my graduating class was more than a little bit unusual in regards to their tendency to look out for each other. Of course, we had jocks taking AP Honors classes, Honors students who were druggies, drama students who also were top-tier jocks(male and female), and so on and so forth, so the social pecking order at school was more than a bit weird.

We did have a transfer student come in try to live out the high school pecking order that Hollywood loves to portray. Only problem was one of the (male) "dorks" she targeted for ridicule happened to be one of those Drama and Athletics types who was popular with everyone. She wound up transferring to the school across town.

It was funny when she turned up again a semester later for one of the classes they'd bus people around for, and hear her wax about "how accepting" our rival school was, and how mean spirited, judgemental, and "all about what (designer label) you wear" so on and so forth trying to lay on the guilt trip on us. (We were the more affluent of the two High Schools) Completely ignoring one of the top female athletes in the school(who was very popular, and also part of the Drama Club) sitting in that same classroom, rocking an ensemble she'd acknowledged came from the Salvation Army thrift store earlier that same day. That girl should probably have been put up for some kind of award for epicly comedic bad timing and targeting for her commentary on things at that school. I don't think she ever figured out why nobody at my school ever took her seriously.

hear her wax about "how accepting" our rival school was

I wonder if that meant that she was able to successfully bully those she considered "inferior".

The bullies in my case were all members of the various athletic groups where the closest I came to athletics was being in the marching band sharing the same field.

See my previous post on this. The Jocks LOVED the band program in my high school, if only because of the pep band turning up at football and basketball games. Rather than being targets for victimization by the jocks. We were more likely to be targets of protection by the jocks when it came to that stuff.

I was not suggesting that my participation in band was a reason for being bullied. I only mentioned it because I was NOT an athletic person at all. I was an outsider since I was not a 'local'. I did not have the appearance of one who could defend himself, nor did I attempt to do so if there was a way to avoid violence.

That works if you are anywhere near as physically capable as they are.

Heck I was the 4 eyed small walking natural target for bullies in all of my schools. I was definitely smaller in size and as a rule weighed less. I did find that a well placed foot in the balls as an opening move tended to end their desire to fight. Their problem was when I got to that point I kept on kicking any an all potential targets on their bodies. Everyone else was safe from my attacks however. I ended up with a reputation and the bullies were treated as angelic victims of my violent reaction.

I didn't rat them out, my parents did. Didn't have much impact in public school, but at the private high school I attended, they were invited to not come back the following year; there were other infractions on their part that pushed it over the line, ultimately, but bullying me definitely contributed to the end result. It did not reflect the character that the school was attempting to instill.

For me my "Bullying" were rather brief and not overly common. Of course, family genetics probably helped a bit in that department. As that meant I trended strongly towards being one of the larger children in the class every year. From Kindergarden all the way through my Senior year. For that matter, when I hit the 10th grade and entered our 3 year Senior High School(9th graders went to Junior High) I was bigger than most of the Seniors on the (State Champion) Varsity Football team.

Of course, being part of the (pep) band probably helped to a large degree too. The Cheerleaders and Jocks at my school actually were able to rub more than a few brain cells together. They loved the pep band in a good way because we made it so much easier for the cheerleaders to "pump up the crowd," so we were treated well by both groups.

But going back to the limited elementary school bullying I encountered, I have memories of the girls in my class turning his life into something of a living hell for the next day or so. I don't even remember what he did, I do know I wasn't particularly bothered by it, but evidently others felt otherwise and acted on their own. He did leave me alone after that though.

Too bad I was young, dumb, and completely oblivious to potential opportunities I evidently had at the time.

Peer pressure is probably the most effective measure against bullying that there is. The problem is many peer groups actually turn out to be the bullies more often than not. Which makes it a very hard line to walk along. "Adult supervision" can't be everywhere, and isn't perfect even at the best of times.