Home » Forum » Story Discussion and Feedback

Forum: Story Discussion and Feedback

Gift or Curse by Ka Hmnd

helmut_meukel 🚫

Attention: this version got age-adjusted! The MC is now seventeen at the start of the story instead of sixteen in the old 2012-version from XNXX. The synopsis remained unchanged however.
(Only compared the first paragraph, not yet checked the whole story for all changes).

HM.

awnlee jawking 🚫

@helmut_meukel

I read the new-to-SOL version. It felt like there was a much larger story trying to get out.

AJ

Replies:   helmut_meukel
helmut_meukel 🚫

@awnlee jawking

It felt like there was a much larger story trying to get out.

I know of a few stories by Ka Hmnd where he expanded the original short story into a novelette or novel.

BTW, many full length novels by other authors started the same way, in some cases two or three related stories got expanded and combined into the new novel.
I personally dislike it if the titles of short story and novel are exactly the same, 'cause I've then to rename the files to avoid overwriting one with the other.(A Beautiful Friendship by David Weber)

HM.

helmut_meukel 🚫

@helmut_meukel

I've now read the new-to-SOL version and switched multiple times to the 2012-version to see if there are differences. (mind: no complete word-for-word comparison.)

I found three differences (old | new):
• first sentence: It was just after the first of the year, I was sixteen. | It was just after the first of the year, and I was seventeen.
• fifth paragraph: It was like I could feel my body or to be précis, my brain, changing somehow. | It was like I could feel my body, or to be precise, my brain, changing somehow.
• At the end of the story one sentence added: --- | It is strange how our life together has made both of us enjoy life more.

In both versions is nothing to find of the used SOL-tag mt/Fa, the sex between the the MC and his teenage love interest Crystal is consensual. That she was abused by her father is just mentioned and should not be tagged at all.

To me the story looks like Chapter 1 of a longer story.

HM.

Back to Top

 

WARNING! ADULT CONTENT...

Storiesonline is for adult entertainment only. By accessing this site you declare that you are of legal age and that you agree with our Terms of Service and Privacy Policy.


Log In