Forum: Author Hangout

The words spoken in the foreign language should be in that language and in italics with the quotes since it's dialogue.

Or, in this example, you could keep it in English for the reader but tell the reader what language is being spoken, as in:

"I finished up good in your mother," he spat back in Spanish (or whatever the language is).

I replied in Spanish, "Must have been a tight fit in the coffin, given she's been dead fifteen years."

Over the years I've tried a number of methods and found two to be the best, one is to have the dialogue in the foreign language if some of the characters present don't know it and aren't expected to understand it. The second is where they're all expected to understand the language just use some extra text in the dialogue tags like:

Fred turned to John and said, in French, "I don't like that idea at all."

So outlining and starting to write something new. Question is, how to demarcate people switching between languages?

Here's how Elena Ferrante did it in her Neapolitan Quartet. Might depend on how much dialogue there is and how frequently the languages change.

However you do it you are likely to get far more comments Criticizing than praising.

So, I would do what You Think/Feel best conveys what You want in your story.

I can be Missunnderstood in more than 20 languages, American English is merely the first I learned, getting me off to a good start of Missunnderstanding.

In my primary story Aztlan Portal, a lot of it is set in Mexico, as well as parts of the USA just across the border. Spanish is often spoken. If most of the dialog is in English, I put Spanish in italics. If it's going to be a sentence or paragraph I usually:

Julio said in Spanish, "dialog."

I use sub-chapter headings, if all or most of it will be in Spanish. I do:
City of Chihuahua
3:15 PM Monday March 22nd 2018
(dialog is spoken in Spanish, but written in English, with some Spanish words in italics)

Acalde Espinosa said, "It is urgent we begin the evacuation as soon as possible. Priority should be given to important party officials. Don't you agree Senor Salazar?"

Darting his eyes to the other senior government officials, Salazar kicked his lips, then said, "Si Jefe."

Realizing he was dismissed, Salazar hastily departed the executive conference room.

I have received some negative comments, as well as constructive criticism. I do consider it. However, my story is partly set in Mexico. If it was set in NYC, or rural Alabama, I would use some regional dialect.

Second Sausalito is set in the bayous of Louisiana, and I really enjoy the use of both dialect and even Cajun to add color to the story.

Some of my favorite authors, such as JRR Tolkien, Tom Clancy, and Louis L'Amour used foreign (or made up) languages and dialect. I am nowhere near as good as them, but I doubt anyone has any more difficulty understanding my story than if I used perfect English.

I realize some people feel "put out of the story" when foreign languages are used.

For me, if characters in a story are buying tacos from a food truck run by a woman from Mexico, and she didn't respond "Gracias." to a tip, or a compliment it would take me out of a story.

I was assisting a fellow veteran who had bought a restaurant in Seattle. Several of the employees remained on staff. Legal immigrants, the Spanish I learned in the Army made working with them much easier. They knew what had to be done. Although I knew the specific repairs and other tasks to be done. How to do things to interfere as little possible, and have the most benefit required their input. I had to learn some more Spanish to get the jobs done.

Some words just don't translate properly. I prefer the original language word(s).

My two cents.

Cheers!