I just wrote some complex dialogue because while Jenna is talking to Cory on the phone, her friend tries to take the phone away from her. So she's talking to two people in the same paragraph. Does what I wrote work?
btw, a few things up front:
1. because of the dialogue that precedes this paragraph, it's known that Jenna is the speaker in this paragraph without needing a dialogue tag.
2. When she's interrupted saying, "You're coming-" it is NOT "cumming."
3. It's written in 1st-person from Cory's POV.
4. the - is an em-dash that the forum software converted to hyphen
So here's the paragraph:
"Oh my god! You're coming-" I heard Jenna screaming away from the phone. "No! No! Stop that!" And then, with a rushed voice, she spoke to me again. "Cory, I have to go. Steph says I'm too loud. Everyone's watching me 'cause of my dad so I have to go. Please come home soon. Please. Please. Love you." She hung up.