After serving in the military for 23 years, I served the next 31 as an editor of two different magazines and a newspaper. I recommended that authors, before submitting a manuscript to an editor, start at the beginning of the story and read every word aloud and immediately correct anything that sounds wrong. When read aloud, errors seem to blatantly jump off the page and confront you, demanding to be corrected.
I bring this up because I just reread Clansman's "The Wimp and the Deb". It is a very good story but it is laced with misplaced words and sentence structures that confound the reader and make it difficult to continue reading what would otherwise be a compelling story. Every mistake I found in the story would have been obvious to the author if he had read it aloud before publishing.
It saddens me when a very good story loses its luster simply because an author publishes before the work is truly ready.