"Who knows whether you have not come to the kingdom for such a time as this?" - Esther 4:14
"If you went back and fixed all your mistakes, you'd erase yourself." - Louis C.K.
Yes, I know about what Louis C.K. did. The quote is still noteworthy. Just like how whenever I go to the dentist, I still think of "dentists tell you not to pick your teeth with any sharp metal objects, but when you sit in their chair, the first thing they grab is an iron hook."
The decision to name Annie's colleague "Esther" was deliberate. Annie... and Harry... have both been through the wringer. But it has brought both of them to this place, a place of learning what grace and mercy look like. I don't (entirely) mean that in the religious/spiritual sense, but in the human sense. Grace and mercy are in short supply these days. A desire to beat people over the head with every mistake they've ever made is not.
When I was in elementary school, there was one guy in my class whose favorite game at recess was "pin the handicapped kid to the ground and pull his leg off." It didn't get any better. When I was in high school, I used a wheelchair part-time. One day, the same guy caught me alone on campus, grabbed my wheelchair, and ran through the building before dumping me out of the chair.
I was raised Catholic, and that year, I was preparing for my Confirmation. One part of the curriculum was attending an overnight retreat. I was already dealing with what I now know to be my first episode of severe depression, and that encounter with my longtime bully sent me into a bit of a spiral. I was still spiraling when I showed up at the retreat center the following evening. But the man who ran the retreat center, who was introduced to me as "Mr. H.," sensed how troubled I was and spent some time with me the following afternoon.
My entire spiritual journey ties back to that conversation, and in many ways, the course of my entire adult life does as well. But it wouldn't have happened without that hair-raising ride through the main building of my high school. If that doesn't happen, neither does everything that came after.
In the same way, the entire course of the rest of Annie's life will rest on her working for Lydia. If she doesn't make that decision, she doesn't find the magazine ad, she doesn't answer it, and she never meets Harry.
In other words, she was brought to the place of working with Esther... for such a time as this.
Incidentally, I am still in contact with Mrs. H. through social media, and the three of us got to have lunch together the last time I went to visit my family. And I again got to experience the simple peace and joy that came with having them minister to me during those two hours.
I dedicate this week's chapter to Mr. H., who, after 49 years of ministry and 90 years on Earth, was told "well done, thou good and faithful servant" earlier this week.