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One of my emailers who pinged me after the last blogal entry said my thing was Very British. Well it is. So British, it's actually vewy, vewy Bwitish. So British that it's set in Doggerland - in the story, tweaked to Dogaland. Go on, give it a goggle, why not? When Bwitain was connected to th'Incontinent - back in the day when the Bison still roamed (European - nose in air - none of your rifle-from-a-choo-choo crowd) there was a sand spit in the middle of what we Bwits call the North Sea. The Incontinents call it other things. At one time it had hills and rivers and trees. Not that many thousand years in the past, as it happens.
It's a quirk of the story, but the Dogaland-Britain in the story is THAT Doggerland - and its nearby Shipping Forecast surrounds. It references the well-known phrase (well known if you happen to be British, anyway): "Dogger, Fisher, German Bight". If my story has a theme tune, it's the tune that traditionally precedes the Shipping Forecast - a weird abberation, repeated every night for many tens of year - Sailing By. You could always - friendly shrug - do a goggle for that too. It'll possibly come across as terribly ironic. But, not if you happen to be actually Bwitish.
And it's Dogaland's National Anthem. So there.
Well this is an interesting exercise. I’m newish to the site, just now posting a story that likes writing itself - but I’m confused by the function of the scoring system. My story is scoring lower, if I’d guessed, than I might have expected since (prurient subject matter aside) I was reasonably sure I write competent fiction.
So, are higher scores a function of more frequent graphic sex scenes? Am I supposed to introduce a voyeuristic tick-tick tic, even if that wouldn't fit the story's fabric or natural pace? Is that how you'd garner a higher score for Fisk?
Or is the subject matter what’s sinking my scores? And, yes, I do get that punished schoolgirls, and a family watching smut on TV are not such mature themes to try to twist into literary art.
But if they're my immature reward to get me writing, then the underlying target is a pastiche of English politics today. The Lib-Cons are the power-corrupted, dirty tricks Tories with no moral compass: they’ll clasp at anything available to keep their sweaty fingertips sliding up and down the greased-up knobs of power.
Or is that just another bubbling pot of bollocks? Look at my blurb. A nightmare world for women… freedom to punish in senior girls schools… belittling big breasted women on TV. It’s a male-dom wank world, pure and simple. More setup than sex, admittedly. But still, who exactly am I trying to fool here?
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