Jack Naked on Set
Chapter 9

Copyright© 2013 by jamesbreitbart

Monday, April 24, 2000

Our plane touched down at LAX, where we were escorted to a limo and driven to our hotel. I had a whole week free from my parents, and to top it off, my room was next door to David's. We didn't start filming until the next day, so we hit the pool. I went naked, hoping to even out my tan for the show. David and Tonya wore bathing suits. When the sun went down, I went to my room to get dressed for dinner. I looked at myself in the mirror. There was still a tan line, but it could be covered up with makeup. The network had made us dinner reservations at one of LA's fanciest restaurants, and I'm sure tipped off the paparazzi. I decided to wear a suit with no tie, figuring it would fit in with LA's casual atmosphere. We met in the lobby and headed out to the limo. I made sure to be photographed kissing Tonya on the cheek.

We were met at the entrance to the restaurant by the manager, and shown to a private booth. It turned out that the network would be paying for all of our meals on the trip. I ordered filet mignon with lobster mashed potatoes, David had Chilean sea bass, and Tonya had a rack of lamb. The food was actually pretty substantial, and a lot better than anything else I'd ever had on someone else's dime.

After dinner, I turned in early and looked over the script before heading to bed. The next morning, I woke up early and went over to Tonya's room. We messed up the bed in a way that we hoped would be suggestive of sex and ordered breakfast from room service. I changed into a bathroom and Tonya took her top off. When the food got there I opened the door. According to plan, Tonya shrieked and ran into the bathroom. I looked embarrassed and had the waiter leave the food at the door. I made sure to leave a generous tip, since I was hoping for this exchange to make it into the papers.

We took the limo over to the set. Tonya was playing the other neighbor, and they shot some scenes with just her first, so I hung out on the edge of the set with David. It was nice to get to spend time with him, I'd found myself attending a lot of functions with Tonya in the recent past, and while she was fun to be around, she wasn't David.

My scenes started shooting after lunch. I stripped off in my trailer and got into makeup. I waited for the shoot to begin with the actors playing my parents, Russell Krause and Kristy Harkness. She used to be a video vixen in the 80s, and he had played a string of bumbling detectives. The scene, the first one of the episode, had our characters, naked of course, come over to welcome the new family with a Bundt cake. David answered the door, stared lovingly at Kristy's breasts, and said "Hi, I'm booby ... er ... Bobby," at which point his parents, played by Gina Olds and Keith Spitzer, showed up and were duly mortified at the sight of our naked bodies, which were to receive a great deal of attention from the camera. Apparently, the writers were planning to give David's character a crush on Kristy. We thought we'd nailed the scene when the director decided he wanted our characters to be barefoot. Apparently it looked weird for nudists to have shoes on. Then the machine that did the laugh track broke and we waited about an hour for them to fix it. We finally finished the scene, but we were behind schedule. We ended up shooting until 10:00, and decided to eat dinner back at the hotel.

 
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