E Is for Exhibitionism

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Tags: Humor, School, Nudism, .

Desc: Humor Story: Another college course taught by Professor Hitherbottom. This social studies field looks at the phenomenon of exhibitionism. How is it different for men and women. The stats and theories presented are real, but the hard facts and dry material turns the guys in the class hard and the girls wet.

Fundamentals Underlying Nudism / Social Exhibitionism. That was the course title at Suffolk U. But the students and many of the faculty referred to it simply as FUN SEX. They had good reason to do so as the course instructor was Henry Hitherbottom whose previous course was Sexually Abnormal Social Systems ( acronym SASSY ) outlined primitive rituals from Aztec and Cretan sacrifice of virgins to Dionysian Saturnalia to the modern rituals of hazing college co-eds. Features in common included forced public nudity, humiliation and physical discipline of the buttock and genital areas resulting in explosions of sexual release in both the individual female participants and the collective body of society members. So FUN SEX promised to be a good party too.

Professor Hitherbottom had yet to devise his on-line registration scheme. The financially lucrative ( but with litigious risks ) Social Spanking scheme (scam), would not be unveiled for another two years. But this course, FUN SEX, was already sold out and had to be held in the University's largest lecture hall seating some 150 students. Hitherbottom had talked the administration into a contract with a minimal stipend but with a per seat bonus payment. His 150 student capacity sell out would mean a term fee twice that of tenured professors. Hitherbottom's Social Psychology degree was handy in putting together lecture notes, but his MBA proved a much greater asset to his bottom line.

Hitherbottom started the day's lesson with an apology for the excessive heat in the auditorium as the current heat wave had proved quite a strain on the building's air conditioning system. He invited any students who felt so inclined to remove any outer clothing and not feel embarrassed to be sitting in mixed company in their underwear. That was greeted by generally nervous laughter but quite a number of guys, already in cut-off shorts, stripped off their t-shirts and sat comfortably bare-chested. Some, but far few, girls removed blouses and some even shucked off their full-length jeans to sit in bra and panties only.

"Thank you, ladies and gentlemen," began the professor." You have just helped me demonstrate this term's thesis for my course Fundamentals Underlying Nudism / Social Exhibitionism. That is, given acceptable social circumstances ( a crowded room, 90 minutes seated with little air flow, excessive heat and, finally, permission granted by a recognized authority or leader, the general population has no problem with disrobing to varying degrees and exhibitionism is embraced not shunned."

"So that is the line we shall call the norm. Accepted and reasonable behaviour still within society's vision of propriety. But society's rules have a source, a foundation and a basis for validity. Consider our cultural heritage in the myths and beliefs of our ancient forerunners. The Garden of Eden was the land of innocence and Adam and Eve were naked and knew it not. It's only when the phallic serpent entered Eve's consciousness ( how's that for metaphor, eh boys? ) that nudism became sin and shame."

The professor often interlaced serious lecture notes with lewd and humourous asides designed to catch students' attention or wake them up from the state of undergraduate stupor. He then went on to quote many an erudite but dry source. ( Most of which was garnered from two clicks on Google that week. From those sites he plagerized unabashedly. He just called it uncited research.)

"Exhibitionism is one of the behaviors in a group of sexual problems called paraphilias. ( No, boys, that is not code for girls' boobies, 'a pair you feel, yes ' ) But the female breasts, like the buttocks, are certainly noteworthy subjects of this particular fetish, social outlet or expression, call it what you will."

"Paraphilias are associated with sexual arousal in response to objects or stimuli not associated with normal sexual behavior patterns. Exhibitionism is the psychological need and pattern of behavior to exhibit naked parts of the body to other people. The part(s) of the body exposed can be the female breasts or the genitals or buttocks of either gender. Displaying one's buttocks for shock value is known as mooning in the U.S. Anasyrma is lifting up one's skirt to expose bare genitals. Martymachlia is a paraphilia involving sexual attraction to having others watch the execution of a sexual act. ( Any boys here named Marty will know what I mean. )"

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Story tagged with:
Humor / School / Nudism /