Chapter 24: The Good of the Country

Lord Newbury

2077

It was an uncomfortable fact that Lord Newbury's title was neither ancient nor especially honourable. But it was a title of which he was very proud although the only privileges it endowed on him were those of status and hereditary wealth. There was no political power associated with the hereditary title and there hadn't been for over seventy years. And now the bastards were threatening to dispose of what little value in the title still remained. Over a thousand years of glorious tradition was to be swept aside. A tradition older than England itself. And all because of the unfinished business of the dissolution of the United Kingdom.

It could have been so different if that idiot Princess Rachel hadn't made such a mess of her proposed marriage to that commoner. It was bad enough that centuries of precedent were amended to enable her to succeed to the throne. And then she broke yet more precedent by wanting to marry a mere low-life. But worst of all was for her to have subsequently made such a fuck-up of the whole affair...

It left a very unpleasant taste in the Right Honourable gentleman's mouth. He grimaced as he regarded the images displayed on his library computer screen.

"Excuse me, my lord," said the butler who had discreetly slipped into the room. "Sir Eric Esterhazy is waiting to see you."

"Is he, Edwards?" said the lord. He hurriedly shut down the browser window so that it showed no evidence of the rather undignified website he'd been visiting. "Show him in."

"Yes, my lord."

Lord Newbury stationed himself in a stately position by the bookcase where he could pretend to consult a rather dull nineteenth century volume on fossil snails. It did at least have some passably interesting black-and-white plates.

Sir Eric entered the library and bowed decorously. He stood at a respectful distance and waited for Lord Newbury to address him.

"Good to see you again, Eric."

"It's good to see you also, my lord."

"I guess you must be wondering why I asked you over here."

"It's always a pleasure, my lord."

"I'm afraid it isn't for pleasure this time. The reason I've asked you to visit is for your advice."

"I'm honoured, my lord."

"How long is it since you retired, Eric?"

"I didn't retire as such, my lord."

"No, I guess not. In what year did you last serve as Member of Parliament for Reigate, Eric?"

"The General Election of '68."

"That's when they redrew the boundaries, wasn't it? It's become harder and harder for decent men to represent the country."

"Much harder, my lord."

"Who represents Reigate now, Eric?"

"An incompetent idiot from the Social and Liberal Democratic Party, my lord."

"I can't keep up with all these new political parties. Whatever happened to the old certainties, Eric?"

"The electorate is perverse, my lord. They would prefer to be represented by a rabble of pretty much identical pinko political parties rather than by a sensible choice between a strong Conservative government and a weak coalition of Greens and Socialists."

"You were never one of those who liked it when the Tories merged with the Liberals, were you?"

"It only served to further compromise an already diluted brand, my lord."

"My concern, however, is less to do with the dismal state of English politics, Eric, but the future no less of England's venerable tradition of aristocracy. As you know, the present coalition government of lefties, greens, vegetarians and lesbians has plans to dispense with the very institution of nobility. If they have their way, the title I bear will be gone forever. I would no longer be known as Lord Newbury. I would be known only as Norman Francis Erickson. That's a disgrace. Honourable traditions such as the aristocracy are what made England great."

"England is no longer great, my lord."

"Indeed," agreed the lord. "The lunatic Left and the Greens have taken over. What justification does the coalition government have for wanting to make the Kingdom of England some kind of republic?"

"Pressure from abroad, my lord," said Sir Eric. "The Kingdoms of Scotland and Northern Ireland have unilaterally declared themselves as the Scottish and Northern Irish Republics. Wales has already been a republic for a while. The Commonwealth has totally disbanded. The Royal Family is no longer perceived as a national asset."

Lord Newbury frowned. "You should never have relinquished power, Eric. See what's happened in the last decade or so. This is a fight to the last breath. What hope has England got in its darkest hour?"

"I need to consult a sympathetic expert in constitutional matters, my lord," said Sir Eric, "but I'm certain that overthrowing a Constitutional Monarch isn't as straightforward as the coalition government seems to believe. It's not just English postage stamps that would have to change. There is also the fact that the Armed Forces pledge allegiance to the crown and not to the government of the day."

"How can the fortunes of the Royal Family be the same as those of the Peerage?" said Lord Newbury. "As far as I'm concerned, the wastrels at Buckingham Palace and Windsor deserve to lose their estates."