After Kathy's 25th birthday things changed or should I say she changed. No longer was she the quiet, shy type when it came to sex, she opened up and enjoyed it for the first time. After 8 years of marriage we were having sex more now than we ever had, even when we were first married.
About five or six weeks after her twenty-fifth birthday Kathy started to become depressed, it kept getting deeper every day, but the sex never slowed down. It didn't matter if it was morning, noon or night, no matter what room we were in, she was ready for sex. Not only the straight sex that we had enjoyed for eight years, but open for trying anything and anywhere. It was nothing to get a bj going down the interstate with cars passing on both sides.
After a couple of months she began to sink into a deep depression. I would ask her what was wrong but she would never talk, I took her to the doctor, thinking that maybe there was something physically wrong, but everything always ended up the same, nothing found.
I would find her crying during the daytime and even sometimes crying at night. This continued for about two weeks until one night during a great sex session she broke down and started crying. Of course I stopped, thinking that maybe I had hurt her in some way. Again I asked what was wrong, she would say nothing. I asked if it had something to do with her 25th birthday and she said yes. I asked if she was feeling guilty about it, she said no. Almost as if asking a small child, this questioning went on for about fifteen minutes before she broke down and started telling me what was bothering her.
Kathy said, "I know that you will think I'm terrible if I tell you."
I assured her that I loved her and I would never feel terrible about her, no matter what.
She began to cry again and said, "I love you so much, but I need something you cannot provide."
I asked her what that could ever be and told her that if it was in my power I would do anything to make her happy.
After a couple of minutes of silence she began to speak softly, "I found something about myself on my birthday, I found that I need not just sex, because you give me all of that I need, but I need sex with different men, do you understand?"
I told her that I was not sure, but keep on talking and we will see what we can work out.
She continued, "It is not about a bigger cock or doing it in different positions, or even different ways of performing sex, but it is about being with different men. It is about being touched by different men. I know that you must think I'm so bad and I wouldn't blame you at all if you could not even love me."
I told her that I did love her and asked what we could do to work things out.
She said that she didn't want to just go and pick up some man, but that she wanted to take one man and make him her lover, no strings attached, just sex.
After thinking for a few minutes, I told her that I wasn't sure that I understood completely but if it would bring back her old happy self, I was willing to try anything. And then I asked her if she had thought about who she might want.
She said, "I haven't given it much thought, let me take a couple of days to make sure and to think about who might make a good lover."
The next couple of days, she seemed to cheer up, being happy the way she used to be.
John and I had worked together for over a year, we were service technicians and the job was such that we spent almost all of every day together. John was probably a perfect example of a thirty year old 6 ft 4 inch man in perfect physical shape, he was always working out.
We always left the shop in a company truck at 8 am and didn't return until around 5 pm. Our route brought us close to my house around noon a couple of times a week, we would stop in and Kathy would fix us lunch.
Kathy and I only had one car and on days she needed the car, she would take me to work and on the way we would pick up John. Many times we were invited into his apartment to wait while he finished getting ready for work.
John had been married for a short time but after that came to a sad end, he now lived with a roommate by the name of Bill.
On Friday evening after work, Kathy said that we needed to talk later that evening. Around 9 pm the kids were put to bed and she began, "I know who I want to be my first lover, promise you won't get mad."
I told her that I would not get mad.
Kathy said, "I would like for John to be my first lover."
I guess I was both shocked and yet not really surprised. As I thought about it, she was always flirted with him and he was always returning the flirts. He was always telling me what a beautiful woman she was and how lucky I was to have her.
She began to cry again and said, "I knew you would be mad."
I told her that I wasn't mad and asked her what she had in mind and when she wanted to start.
She said that she would like to go tonight before she backed out. I told her it was OK, go get ready.
A few minutes passed and she came back down stairs dressed in a mini skirt and looking good enough to eat.
She gave me a kiss and told me she would be back in a couple of hours.
I told her that I would wait up until 11:30 then go to bed, but for her to be sure to wake me when she came in, that way we could talk about how things went.
As I watched her drive down the street, I was filled with both joy and fear, joy for making her happy and fear because I was afraid that she would truly fall in love with someone else and I would loose her.
About 30 minutes later the car pulled in front of the house, Kathy came in and said that John wasn't at home but that she had talked to Bill, his roommate, for a couple of minutes and he said that he didn't know for sure when John would be back.
She was about to back out, saying that maybe this was a sign that she shouldn't do this. I reassured her that wasn't the case, but to wait an hour and try again. Kathy said she would try one more time.
Kathy could not sit still for the next hour; she kept pacing the floor, like a leopard that was just waiting to get out of its cage. Finally 10:30 rolled around and again she kissed me goodbye and said that she would wake me when she got in.
I stood in the doorway as the taillights of our Mustang went around the corner and disappeared, I kept watching, maybe deep inside hoping that he wouldn't be home and she would be coming back around the corner one more time. But after forty-five minutes, I knew that she would not be back. A sickening feeling came over me, knowing that for the first time she was on her own with another man. All sorts of scenarios were going through my mind, what if she got hurt, but knowing John, he would never do that. What if she fell in love with him and left me, that one I could not reason away.
I watched the 11 o'clock news with only the very slightest of interest. At 11:30 I walked to the door one more time and took a long look in both directions to see if she was coming back, but nothing. I got ready for bed and lay down in the bed that had been our love nest for years, but tonight it seemed so empty. All I could do was toss and turn, listening to every car that passed by the house to see if it was going to stop. At some point, I did drift off to sleep. It seemed like only seconds when I felt Kathy crawl in bed and snuggle up to me. She began to cry and I asked what was wrong.
She began to speak through sobs, "I'm such a bad wife, how do you put up with me? I spent the last couple of hours in another mans arms and that wasn't bad enough, and I enjoyed it, what is wrong with me."
I held her close, and let her cry for a couple of minutes and told her that she wasn't a bad wife; she wasn't sneaking around behind my back. I understood her need and I loved her enough to sacrifice some things if it would make her happy. Then I asked if she wanted to talk about it.
This account is what she told me that night.
After leaving me the second time, she had driven back to John's apartment, when she rang the bell, John wasn't home yet but Bill was, she asked if she could come in and wait because that she needed to talk to John. Bill told her no problem and if there was something wrong, could he do anything to help.
She told him no and she took a seat on the couch. It wasn't hard to tell that she was extremely nervous.
Within a few minutes John came in the door and when he saw Kathy he asked what was wrong, had we had a fight and did she needed a place to crash for the night, she told him no, but that she really needed to talk to him in private. Each apartment in the building had its own terrace with sliding glass doors opening on to it from both the living room and the master bedroom. John asked if she wanted to step out on the terrace and talk. Once outside she sat down on a glider and John sat beside her. She began to talk about everything under the sun except what she really needed to talk to him about. She assured him that nothing was wrong.
The night was a perfect warm spring night, the air filled with sweet fragrances of the new spring flowers that were everywhere, every plant and tree was filled with blossom. The night sky was clear, thousands of stars twinkled against a black background and over the next building the full moon was just starting to make its appearance.
As they talked Kathy moved over closer to John, building up nerve as she went, she raised herself up from the seat and kissed John on the lips, he was startled and told her that he didn't want to hurt me in any way. Kathy assured him that I knew where she was and what she was doing. He didn't understand what she meant.
.... There is more of this story ...