Chapter 6: Manifestation Six: The Passion of Hatred

One by one I had gathered the unconscious but healed bodies of Nene, Tama, Ume, Chika and Juri, and brought them down to the living room and placed them in comfortable positions on the floor. I returned to my bloodied bedroom and, with great care, gathered my three dead companions and placed them on their own futons. I turned and faced the terrified woman crouched against the furthest wall. She was staring at the three dead bodies like they would jump up and attack her. I moved to stand in front of her and knelt down so I was to some degree level with her. I examined her carefully. She wasn't anything like the person I had seen in the bathroom. She acted like someone completely different. Her eyes were skittering around the room trying to take everything in and trying not to look at the bodies or me. I moved closer and she cringed, closed her eyes and let out a whimper. I could tell at that moment that this was, somehow, a different personality than the one earlier. I settled down in front of her and tried my best to capture her full attention with my eyes.

"What is your name?" I asked in a whisper. It took a few times asking this before she responded in a coherent manner. She was almost cataleptic, the mask of shock and fear on her face unmoved, even though I stood between her and the grisly vision of death. I watched her mouth move in silence and I leaned forward as close as I could and put my ear almost on her mouth to hear what she said. I could smell the fear on her as I listened to her speak her name.

"Lexa... , I'm Lexa." she said in a light and quivery whisper.

Even though I'd moved in front of her, blocking her vision of the carnage behind me, I could tell she wasn't going to last long. I stepped forward and whispered in her ear a few words to calm her, and then gently placed my hand on her forehead. She slowly crumpled to the floor with a sigh and was unconscious. I gathered her up in my arms and carried her into the living room to dump her on the floor next to the others. I knew she was going to be out until I woke her up myself, and not before. I examined the others one by one and helped them into more comfortable positions. I did not want to go back up to my room with the state it was in right now. I could sense the voice in my head was in a terrible shape, and going through emotions that it was neither familiar with or prepared to handle. I waited there, seated on the couch, for any one of the women to awaken from the state they were in. I noticed things seemed to be a bit fuzzy around me, and then they got real distant real fast. I watched in a detached manner as the floor came up and hit me in the face. Except a vague thought that I might have been attacked or something, on the way down to the floor, I didn't remember much after that.

"HEY!" I was jolted to awareness by the voice. "Ah, there you are ... boy, you really took a vacation there didn't you? I think we need to speak for a while here, and I'm going to need your full attention for that."

"I'm fully aware of you now." I stated quietly. I was back in the nondescript place again with the voice. "What do you wish to speak about?"

"OK, let's see ... three people are dead. People I, and therefore you, care deeply for. I want to know what you think of it and what we should do about it."

"I do not have the emotions to feel for these people, but as you are part of me I can only assume that we, in fact, do care for all these women. You seem to be taking this quite well, but I can sense the energies contained by you in your anger, I can also tell that you are doing well in holding it in." I stated.

"I'm not holding it in!" the voice roared. "I want to rip and rend!" it became quite incoherent at that point, and the backlash of violent energies slammed into me from all sides. I felt myself pounded again and again with the vile and burning torrents of anger, it permeated me, it filled me, and it fed on itself and became stronger and stronger. I finally faded to oblivion once again.

It was a long time before I came back to awareness. I could tell that by the fact that I was in my room and the place was spotless. It was darkest night and the rain striking the window sounded like sand in a windstorm. I moved out of the bed with shaky legs and almost collapsed with weak knees. I regained my balance and moved unsteadily to the closed glass doors to the balcony and leaned my head against the cold glass. I could still feel the burn and flare of anger. I didn't remember feeling that before, in fact I did not remember feeling any emotions before, even though, I assumed, that I had at one time felt many emotions. I could hear my breath coming in ragged rasping gulps and my vision became fuzzy with the world retreating from me slightly. I recognized that I would need to focus if I was going to do anything useful, as it's kind of hard to do anything when you can't get around the desire to rend and destroy. I heard the door to my bedroom sliding open but I stayed pressed against the window. I heard no other sounds after that but my own breath and the odd growl come from deep within my chest, something I wasn't consciously making. I closed my eyes and heard the voice in my head, "You're going to have to deal with the anger now. You've taken it from me and now you're one step closer. Focus and concentrate." it said with force.

"Kie-kun, are you OK?" a quiet voice asked from a distance.

I spun around and leaned against the window, pressing the back of my head against its coldness. I looked at the five women standing just inside the door of my room looking ... scared. "Anger." I spit the word out. "I feel ... I feel anger and I can't stop it." I added in a tight voice, trying to hold it back from them.

They looked shocked and even more scared, Juri-sensei moved a step forward from the rest, "You need us to help?"

"I need to focus!" I grunted. "I need to get it under control. It's not safe to be around anyone with pure anger as the only feeling." I finished as I began to concentrate and focus. I distanced myself from the emotion and closed my eyes. I pictured the emotion as a raging inferno and began to force it into a smaller and smaller form. It took shape slowly and gradually became a small ball of white heat. I held it in my hand in my mind and examined it. Its surface had a motion that when stared at made you want to smash it. It was such a pretty white ball. I could feel the heat radiate from its surface. It felt good to hold it. I wanted to press it to my chest. I wanted to fling it away. I nestled it gently to my chest and embraced it. I accepted its bitterness and its heat, its harshness in its intent. I accepted the pain it caused and the rightness of it. I focused on it and accepted it. I faded into me and then was gone.

"You have done well." I heard the voice say from a distance, "Now ... you need this." It finished quietly.

I received a flash of images, a whirlwind of faces and places and sights and sounds. I was somewhere else and sometime else. I watched the death of people I knew I should know but didn't recognize. I watched people that were part of me die most violent deaths. I watched and I absorbed and I comprehended. I came to a conclusion. The price to pay would be more than some people would even guess. I was about to make the accounts balance. I returned to my room, opening my eyes, and saw the fear and worry on the faces of the people that I had become connected with. "I will be busy now. I suggest you all hide in your rooms until I say it's safe." I said in a new tone of voice, coldness entered the room and they stepped nervously out of my way as I walked by them to exit the room. I was heading down stairs to speak with someone I would require to awaken, but still a fountain of information I would hope. I arrived in the living room but did not find anyone there. I turned and, noticing them standing at the base of the stairs, asked, "Where?"

Nene-san cringed at the ice in my voice and answered in a tiny voice, "We put her in the chair in the library."

I stalked into the library and saw the woman, still unconscious, seated comfortably in the chair. I stalked over to her and crouched down so that I was at her height. I tapped her forehead and she shivered slightly as she was released from the binding I placed on her. She developed a slight smile on her face for a moment, but that disappeared immediately the moment her eyes opened and she saw me. A sharp intake of breath from her and I knew she understood the danger of her position. "I'll give you one chance and no others. I want everything, and I want it now." I whispered coldness into her heart. She blanched a bit but began to talk. She was a smart woman and started at her first memories of what happened to her and quickly the story was told.

She had been introduced to a group of people by her family when she was the age of 10. These people, she was told, were good people that were trying to protect the human race from evil of the most insidious form, Demons. She was told that she would be going to join these people and help them. She was trained in many forms of protection and attack that were specifically designed to banish and destroy demons and their servants. She was told that anyone who worked with or 'consorted with' demons was instantly unclean, and the only way to save them was to cleanse them. It was at about this point that she realized that their idea of cleansing was actually just killing, and that there was something more there that didn't sit right with her. She tried to find out more but, during one of her forays into the offices of the facility that they were training her at, she was caught. At first she just thought she would be reprimanded, or maybe kicked out, but instead they dragged her to a barren and dark room in a deep sub-basement of the complex. She didn't know on entry that it was a huge chamber at first but after a few moments of being held in silence there came a group of the higher ups shrouded in cloaks. They entered the room and gathered in a circle at its center. A series of torches and candles were lit in a circle, and she realized at that point that it was a summoning circle and she was being witness to a major summoning. Before any of the chanting began, she was thrust into the center of the circle and chained at its center. Once the chanting began she knew that there wasn't any way she was going to escape from her plight. She was to be a vessel to a demon, and become that which she was trained to destroy. She said she made peace with herself and decided to retreat deep into her mind. It was after the possession by the demon that she realized that she was now just a silent observer to whatever the demon did with her body. She had no control over it. She told me all about everything that was done while she was possessed. She told of horrid mass elimination's of large groups of innocents, just to hide the activities of the group. She spoke of banishing of demons so disgusting that had it been her she would have never been able to even move to do the dirty deed. She had thought at first that whatever the organization had done wasn't that bad, until she came to the conclusion that it was in fact nothing more than a power struggle. One major demon was trying to make sure that it was the only one around, so all the power would go to it and none other. She also feared that now that she was free of its influence she was now a target, or worse, she might still be accessible by the demon somehow.

I sat back on the floor in front of Lexa and stared at her thoughtfully. I knew that the likeliness that she was lying was none. I could almost feel it coming off her. I could also sense a taint about her that I didn't feel from anyone else. She had been more than touched by a demon, and the scent on her was almost strong enough to smell. She needed help and she needed to be cleansed of the taint. The difference was that I wouldn't kill her. She would not die if I had anything to say about it. "Lexa, I believe that we can keep you safe and healthy, but in turn you will need to give me exact information on everyone you've met so far." It took a while, but I was able to narrow down the most important few people to about seven, and the location could only be guessed at as somewhere in the vicinity. I stood and walked back and forth in front of her, silently thinking, until I was disturbed by the entry of Juri-sensei and Nene-san. I watched them enter quietly and move to either side of Lexa, who appeared to have either gone to sleep or passed out. It wasn't until I heard her let out a slight buzz that I knew she was asleep. The ladies lifted her gently and carried her out and off to some other more comfortable part of the house. Chika-san stepped into the room after they left and looked at me.

"We listened in on your conversation, so we know she was a victim as much as us." She glanced back into the living room then back to me," We're going to move her to one of the spare rooms and let her sleep. She'll be under observe ration for a while." Then she stepped back out of the room leaving me to my thoughts.

I was considering paths that needed to be walked and actions that would be taken. It was not going to be pleasant, I could still feel the nova of anger sitting behind my eyes. I barely had it under control. I heard the voice. "Better you than I, once you're ready you'll receive the rest of them." it said quietly.

"The rest of what?" I demanded out loud. All I received was silence as a reply. I knew it would be useless to try to get it to answer, so I threw the question to the back of my mind and moved on to what needed to be done. I exited the library and walked to the front door of the house. Before I could arrive at the door I heard the pounding footsteps of people running towards me. I spun around to find all the women running towards me. I wasn't sure at first if I should stand there and wait for them to arrive, or turn and run. I couldn't tell what their intentions were at first. I would have moved quickly out of the way if I had realized that there was something in the path of these women other than just me. The leader of the group, Tama-san, stumbled on something and lost her footing. With a squeal she sent herself sailing through the air at me, followed by everyone else in a tangled knot of limbs as they also tripped on the same item. I braced for impact and heard the voice say something quickly.

"Perfect time for another one!" came the quick comment.

I felt like someone had punched me in the stomach just as they hit me. There was a burning behind my eyes, a lump in my throat, I could feel my heart beating faster, there was a flushed feeling in my face. I hit the floor hard with a group on top of me, and lost my breath in a whoosh. Warmth and softness pressed down on me and I didn't mind that I couldn't breathe. I felt a rightness about this, and closed my eyes to absorb the sensations pressing against me. I lay at the bottom of the heap of writhing women, watching body parts fade slowly to black and listening to voices become more distant, I thought to myself, "These are the people I would give my life for ... I must love them." I could feel the rightness of that thought, and drifted off into darkness hearing the laughter of the voice in the distance.

I was sitting in the black room again and looking at my legs which were crossed. I appeared to be seated on the floor. I looked around again and noticed that there still did not seem to be anything in this area of lighted night. I could see no floor or walls or even a ceiling. "Are you still there?" I asked.

"I'm here, how you feeling?" the voice asked. I could detect some humor in its voice.

"What did you do before I went out like a light?" I demanded. "Something about me changed."

"I returned another one of your emotions." it answered, "The first one you got back was..."

"Anger." I spit the word out like it was toxic.

"And now you have love to balance that." the voice replied quietly, "I will be returning one emotion after another until you have them all again. Time is coming to a close, and you will learn the truth all in good time. For now I would suggest you explore what you have and see what it does. Most of all, relax and don't fight it, let it all flow around you for now. Center yourself, Centered and relaxed." The voice quietly chanted this mantra.

For a while as I focused on nothing and let everything flow around me. My mind was blank and I let the emotions I contained just settle. I became nothing and everything. I thought about the women for an instant, and then let the thought go. An image of Lexa came to mind, but I released it and it disappeared. I became a pearl, a small pebble smoothed to roundness by the flow of everything around me. I became the essence of stillness.

"I can see you are ready for more." The voice whispered to me, "This is going to hurt..."

I can feel a tear in my chest and a weight on my heart. Tears start to flow from my eyes as I release the feelings I have now gained. I can feel a floating feeling and the rise of my heart now, too. I feel a terrible sadness and an almost painful joy. I remember Sata-san, Yui-san and Doi-san and the realization that I loved them. I also remember seeing them lying on the floor in pools of blood. The joy and sadness strike as one, and I am overwhelmed by it all. I cry.

"Calm ... relaxed," I hear the voice speak to me softly, "You need this even if does hurt"

I can not stay calm and I can not be relaxed, I can only mourn the losses I have sustained. I can feel myself collapse and wail the pain I feel to the universe. The sadness is almost too much, but it begins to recede a bit as I see the joy in ever having met and spent time with these three ladies. I regain my balance a bit.

"Center yourself again, feel and remain calm, relaaaaaax." I hear the voice say distantly.

I refocused on my center and let everything flow again. I allow the feelings to enter and release them again. I let go and focus on my calm. I can see the faces of everyone dear to me, people I love and people I loved. I acknowledge them, accept them, and then move on to the void of calm that is at my center.

"Now more," the distant voice said.

I could feel another pull from my center, something that made my blood boil and my heart turn to ice. I could feel the want and need gnaw at me. I needed these women more than air itself, but I just wanted to run and hide. I knew I felt intense desire for them, and this made me fear myself and what I would do without control. I refocused to my center and let it all flow again. The turbulence in my stream almost dragged me off, but I let these go free. I released the needs and I released myself from the wants. I let go and became a void. All was calm again and I accepted the desires, needs and wants.

"Finaly." came an even more distant and quieter voice.

I sat at the center of everything and felt it. It was insidious and cold, quiet and bitter, sharp and more hurtful than a slash from a steel blade. Without focus I would have become something that I could not, and would not have been able to control. I felt a focused pinpoint of vibration. It became directed at one group. Hate was what I felt for the people that had caused thoes close to me to be harmed. I had a full hate for those who had killed and maimed for the desire of power. There would be an accounting held, and I would collect on it. I could have let the hate feed me. I could have let the hate consume me with a righteousness, but I, once again, let myself go. I brought the focus back to myself and let myself be nothing. All thought was released and all feelings were let alone to be what they wanted to be. These feelings became part of my fiber and part of my essence. I accepted them and absorbed them. I let them become me as much as I became them. They were only a part of me, and I was not controlled by my emotions. I was in control. I was the whole that they were parts of.

"How do you feel?" I heard whispered from the voice. "Tell me how you feel?"

I let out a sigh. "I feel ... good." I replied, exuding calm.

The world around me, the darkness and nothingness I had existed in for the last little while, wobbled a bit. I could sense a change around me. I felt myself becoming distant from my location and spiraling into nothing, my surroundings faded. I sat up quickly and glanced around quickly. I was on the couch and alone in the living room, or I thought I was. I felt a warm hand on my shoulder from behind. I was pulled back down so my head was resting on a lap and I looked up into the face of Juri-sensei. "We were starting to worry about you. We're all really sorry for the accident." she said with a sheepish look. We were all trying to do the same thing, stop you from going outside in the condition you were in. You looked like you were about to kill, and we were afraid you just might." She paused and looked closer at me. She looked into my eyes and sat back quickly in shock at what she saw, letting out a surprised shout. I could hear footsteps in the distance.

A slow smile developed on my face as I gazed at her. I realized that this was one of the people that were important to me. I would give anything to this person, including my life. I watched the others arrive quickly and gather at the end of the couch next to Juri-sensei. I looked into the eyes of each one and saw someone that was just as important to me as the breath of life itself. I was saddened by the missing three, but knew there would full payment for their loss. I smiled at each of them in turn and greatly enjoyed the looks on their faces as their jaws dropped, a smile they didn't expect.

I was settled on the couch and catered to for a while, as they seemed a bit more than embarrassed for the earlier accident and wanted to make sure I was alright and uninjured. I spent the time talking to the voice which seemed a bit more subdued that usual, almost quiet.

I asked, "So is there something else you plan on doing to me?"

"There is only one other thing that needs to be done, and it will not be done for a little while yet," was the quiet reply, "You're not ready for that yet."

I was a bit worried at this, but understood that if I felt I was not ready, then I would bide my time for when I was. I spent some time with my eyes closed, feeling the world around me and my emotions, and letting everything go. I meditated for a good hour, focusing and relaxing while contemplating the changes in myself. It was during this meditation that I could sense someone near me. I returned to myself and my surroundings and opened my eyes a bit. Nobody in front of me, turned my head left and right, nobody beside me. I guessed I had been mistaken and swung my feet to the floor. I didn't miss the motion out of the peripheral vision. Someone had been behind me, and now that there was a place next to me they climbed onto the couch quickly. I turned to find myself staring into the face of Lexa, she looked worried and a bit frightened. Over her shoulder I could see the rest of the women huddled in the entry to the dinning room. I finally figured out that they were trying to get me to deal with Lexa in some way or other, hoping for the best, by the looks of it. I kept my face clear of any emotions as I glanced at them, then returned my attention to Lexa. She moved slowly onto the arm of the couch and climbed into the seat next to me while retaining eye contact.

"Are you OK?" she asked quietly.

I looked into her eyes and questioned myself as to why she would be interested if I was OK or not. "I believe I'm OK, but..." I began with a neutral voice.

"But you want to know why I'm interested, after all I did try to kill you, or at least it seemed that way." she finished.

"No, I need to know that you are fine after being released from possession." I said with a small smile, "I understand that you didn't try to kill me or anyone I know, as you were not in control."

I looked at Lexa again and found her to be almost a waif of a woman. She could not have been any more than about 50kg, with a slight bone structure and was well defined muscles. I could tell she was strong and quick from the way she moved during her attack, but that was while she was possessed. Now she looked brittle and fragile. I looked at the line of her jaw, the slope of flesh that ran from below her ear to her shoulder, and the little dip at the base of her throat. I could see how smooth and unblemished her skin was. I noticed a flush or redness spreading down her neck, and looked up at her face to see a look of embarrassment. "I believe you are a good person, Lexa, and I believe your heart is true. If it was up to me I would let you stay until you decided otherwise. I'm afraid that it in not my place to make decisions like that." I said, placing my hand on her shoulder with a smile.

At that point the rest of the women rushed out of the kitchen cheering, shouting and making congratulatory remarks to Lexa, "You can stay as long as you want to!" said Juri-sensei with enthusiasm, "Consider yourself part of the family."

Everyone was huddled around Lexa patting her on her back and talking excitedly, when I heard something that made me stand quickly and face the wall of windows. I couldn't see anything, as it was dark outside, but I could almost feel something moving around, some things actually. I grabbed the closest cushion and flung it at the light switch across the room. The lights went out and I swept my arm back and knocked the women backwards onto the floor amidst screams and squeals. Lexa had ducked my swing and was now pulling me down to the floor on top of her. I heard her hiss at the women for silence, and I moved rapidly off of Lexa and to the far end of the couch away from everyone. I wanted to get as close to the windows as possible, yet make sure I was covered from sight. "Lexa Get everyone into the kitchen freezer and make sure it's secured from inside!" I whispered to her. I heard a grunt of ascent and some quiet shuffling sounds that I attributed to the women moving, and then all was quiet again. I saw some motion outside but nothing I could pin down.

"Don't do this alone," I heard the voice whisper to me in almost a tired sounding voice, "You need her to support you."

I paused for a moment and considered retrieving Lexa until I heard motion coming back from the kitchen and knew she was back already. "Welcome back." I whispered, "Take the left side, I'll take right. Wait for it."

Without any other words she moved to the left side of the wall length window while I moved to the right side, and then we waited. I could see her crouched down and balanced on the balls of her feet and a kitchen knife in either hand, edge facing out from her. She looked like she was a tightly wound spring ready for anything, without being so tightly wound she would break first. I was crouched and ready, I could feel the pulse in my chest, the breath in my lungs, and a rapidly building anger that whoever was out there was interfering with my life again, trying to destroy me for no reason that I thought was worth while. I could hear the voice deep in my mind set up a steady growl and I fed on the anger. "No one dies." I hissed coldly to my partner.

With that statement out, the window flew into the house now in a million pieces followed by four people. They tumbled in like the first act of a circus troupe and landed in the center of the living room. I paused for a moment to see if others were going to follow, but I sensed that there were no more. I started moving and Lexa moved at the same time. I caught the first one closest to me with a sweeping chop to the back of the knees causing them to fall backwards. Before they could even hit the ground I brought my fist down hard on their check and they slammed into the floor hard enough to break what sounded like three ribs and provide themselves with a harsh concussion from the way they landed, that one was out. The other one in my line wasn't wasting any time on introductions and swung what looked like a 25cm dagger at my face while lunging towards me. I leaned backwards and slapped the floor as I landed to take the impact away. I flicked a foot upwards and kicked the now redirected knife upwards and out of my attackers hand. The knife buried itself deeply into the ceiling and the attacker leaped back out of my range. I could tell that Lexa was doing OK from the sounds of battle on the other side of the room, battle that meant she was still causing someone trouble while I dealt with my attacker. I returned to my feet and, as my attacker lunged at me with a knife edge kick, I stepped inside the attack and brought my knee and heel of my hand struck upwards into the chin. I hit my attacker so hard that they rose up about a meter and flopped the floor like a marionette with its strings cut. I moved to assist Lexa, but she finished off the last attacker with an elbow to the side of the head, four masked attackers on the glass shard covered floor and no sign of any blood.

"One broken nose, one broken arm, and a shattered knee," she listed quietly. "One with arms broken, a fractured skull, and a shattered jaw and nose."

"Tie them up with whatever you can find to make damn sure they're not going to get up any time soon." I said quietly, "I'm going to look around and see if there are any stragglers."