Chapter 8

Naturally the first thing I did when I got to Riley's the next day was corner Candy and ask her about the "shame shame" sign she'd made the night before.

"What do you expect when you are messing around with a married woman? Shame shame on you."

"Give me a break okay? I didn't know she was married and come to think of it you didn't know either. You were the one who told me she was looking for a sucker to marry her so she could stay in this country."

"Ain't that just like a man. Trying to blame a poor little girl like me when you been bad. One more shame shame on you."

"You trying to tell me I can't win here?"

"You got it sport."

I joined the gang at the tables and Candy brought me a beer. The evenings topics were football and politics again and we were discussing the latest bone-headed maneuver our illustrious governor had pulled when Leslie pulled me off my chair to dance with her. As we danced she said:

"I talked to Marge today."

"Oh?"

"I mentioned that a three way with her, me and you might be fun and she agreed. All I need is for you to say yes."

"And if I don't?"

"I'll spread the rumor that you have thirty-seven different strains of sexually transmitted diseases."

"Thirty-seven?"

"What can I say? You must be very, very sexually active."

"You are an evil person. Fortunately for me I have a defense to use."

"And that would be?"

"That I got fourteen of them from you when you pulled a train at my birthday party."

"And you say that I am evil. Okay, I'll drop the blackmail, but while I had her on the phone I told her I was going to hustle you tonight. You admitted that you owed me one, remember?"

"And what did Marge say to that?"

"She wished me luck."

"I need to change bars. I'm getting to be too much taken for granted in this one."

"Oh you poor baby you. Life is just so unfair to you. Your place or mine?"

"Your place; its closer."

"Give me a fifteen minute head start."

She finished her drink and then said "Good night" and left. I ordered another PBR and nursed it while listening to the guys talk football and when fifteen minutes had gone by I got up and left. On the way to Leslie's I wondered why Marge had given Leslie the go-ahead. She was finally off her monthly and I know how horny she must be and she was expecting me to be at her place to scratch her itch, so why tell Leslie to take a shot? I figured that it must be because of the talk we'd had about my reluctance to get involved in multiple partner sex. She was going to let Leslie work to soften me up for the idea.

When I got to Leslie's place I found a post it note on the front door saying "come on in." I walked in and couldn't resist calling out, "Honey, I'm home."

"In the bedroom" I heard so I headed that way. When I got there Leslie was lying naked on the bed. She looked at me and said:

"What's wrong with you? Why didn't you leave a trail of discarded clothes between the front door and this bed? Just thinking of me on the drive over should have had you inflamed with passion. Get your clothes off and get over here."

"Yes ma'am. Whatever you say ma'am. I'm here to serve you ma'am."

"Wise ass. You wouldn't dawdle if it was you who was hurting. You do need to hurry. It's been four months since I dumped Rory and I'm so horny I should be braying like a goat."

As I climbed on the bed she said, "No foreplay lover; just down and dirty for the first one."

"Oh? You expect more than one?"

"Damned straight I do. You aren't leaving this place until I can't get you up any more."

That proved to be four hours later after two sessions of regular intercourse, one session of anal, two portions of head (giving and receiving) and a little sixty-nine. I was too whipped to get out of bed and go home so I spent the night cuddled up to Leslie. Leslie and I showered together in the morning and it almost led us back to the bed, but then Leslie said:

"Damn it to hell! I want to, but I can't. I'd end up being late for work and I can't let that happen. Marge is going out of town for the weekend. Can I have you?"

"Promise that I'll still be alive come Monday morning?"

"Why would you ask that?"

"Haven't you been trying to fuck me to death? It sure seemed that way last night."

"I promise I won't hurt you — at least not too much."

"How about I pick you up here about six-thirty and take you to dinner?"

"Okay, but I get to pick dessert."

I had two jobs that I needed to finish by the end of the day so I pretty much kept my nose to the grindstone. I did make time during my lunch break to call Marge. I needed to make sure that she was cool with what I was doing with Leslie. I wasn't dumb and Leslie had stopped us the first time around when she found "her true love" and if it happened once it could happen again. Marge, on the other hand, had let me know upfront that she wasn't interested in any emotional entanglements and we could bounce the bedsprings for as long as I liked as long as I didn't expect any more out of our relationship than fun. She told me that she was okay with my seeing Leslie and in fact she was the one who sent Leslie my way when Leslie was talking with her and Susan about dumping Rory and how honey she was getting.

At four-thirty I got a call from my brother telling me that I was right on in my take on Elaine's lawyer and to swing by and see him some time during the weekend.

That night I took Leslie to Spagnola's for dinner and then we swung by the Silver Slipper for drinks and dancing. We ended up at my place and Leslie spent the better part of the night trying to reduce me to a quivering puddle of jelly and meeting with a fair amount of success. We stopped at the Village Inn for breakfast when I took her home in the morning and over pancakes we made plans for the evening. She wanted to stay in and would fix dinner for us.

I dropped her at her place and then I went home and did my usual Saturday chores. I washed the truck, cleaned my apartment and did my laundry. At five I was back at Leslie's and following dinner we played gin rummy and talked until Leslie finally threw her cards down and said:

"Enough of this shit. You know what I really want to do so let's get with it."

It was another exhausting night for me. Leslie fixed us breakfast in the morning and then asked if I would see her again that evening and I told her no, that I was going to be spending the day with my brother and the visit would probably run late.

"Well I'm not going anywhere today so if you decide you would like to stop by just give me a call and don't worry about how late it might be."

I spent the afternoon with my brother and his family and when I left at nine I was in a marvelous mood and wanted to celebrate. I called Leslie and told her I could stop by after all if it was still okay with her.

"How do you want me waiting? With a deck of cards and a pad to keep score on in my hands or naked with my high heels on?"

"Damn! Decisions, decisions, decisions. Maybe you should just surprise me."

When I rang the bell and she answered the door the very first thing I noticed is that she didn't have a deck of cards in her hand. Somehow I was not surprised.

Monday morning during my first break I called Gerald Montrose. I told the woman who answered the phone that I needed to speak to Mr. Montrose.

"And this is in regard to?"

"Just tell him that Rob McKeean is calling. I'm pretty sure that he will take the call."

After a few seconds Montrose came on the line. "Mr. McKeean, what can I do for you?"

"The fifteen days is almost up and I decided that I need to get together with you to make the necessary arrangements."

"Decided not to be a guest of the county again?"

"Yeah. I've got better things to do with my time now."

"I have an opening tomorrow at one-thirty."

"I'll be there."

I skipped going to Riley's that night. I wanted to be very clear headed when I had my meeting with Montrose. I showed up for my one-thirty meeting at one-twenty and believing that Montrose would be on a power trip since he had managed to beat me down I fully expected that he would make me wait so I'd brought a magazine to read. Montrose did not disappoint me. It was one forty-five when he secretary said:

"Mr. Montrose will see you now."

She ushered me into his office and as I expected he did not stand and offer his hand. He motioned to a chair and I sat down. He looked at me for a moment and then smiled a 'wolfish' kind of smile and then said:

"First off, and this is not part of what the judge ordered, but before I go in front of him and tell him that the matter has been taken care of I will expect that my fees in this matter be taken care of in full."

"Somehow I thought that you might say something like that."

I slid a large manila envelope across the desk to him. "While you read that I'll think about your condition."

My brother was an insurance adjuster and there were times when he had to employ a detective agency. Like the time a guy swore he hurt his back on the job and continued to collect benefits while saying that his back prevented him from going back to work. A private detective got film of the man lifting large rocks while building a retaining wall in his backyard. My brother used that detective agency a lot and after recognizing Montrose as the man who came up to Elaine and put his hand on her shoulder the night she locked me out of the house I asked my brother if he could arrange for the detective agency to check out Montrose. Bill had gotten me a reduced rate and the agency's report is what I had just slid across the table to Montrose. I gave him a few minutes to go over the contents and then I said:

"As you can see it is quite complete. I will admit that I was surprised to find that you and Elaine were hanging horns on me long before she asked for the divorce. It is unfortunate for you that the Shangri-La Motel keeps its parking lot video surveillance tapes for two years. Those tapes show that you and Elaine were frequent visitors for a good three months before she came to me and asked me to cut her loose. The ironic thing is that the motel was keeping those tapes on the advice of their attorney. One of your own compatriots is responsible for nailing you. The stuff from the last two weeks are the result of my private detective checking you out and you have only yourself to blame for that. I didn't recognize you in court that day as the man who came up to Elaine and familiarly put his had on her shoulder until you smiled and laughed at me for being so dumb as to renew my driver's license.

"Anyway, I heard your condition and I've decided that I don't care for it and I'm not going to do it. Here are my conditions. You eat your fee. You go in front of the judge and tell him all arrearages have been taken care of and you will file the necessary paperwork to amend the divorce decree to remove the part where it says I have to pay alimony. In exchange for you doing all that I will promise that a copy of the report that you have in your hands will not find its way to the states bar association ethics committee. I will also see to it that it doesn't get distributed to the congregation of your church. By the way I am shocked, just shocked that a devout Jehovah's Witness such as you hold yourself out to be would become involved with a married member of your congregation.

"Also, since the surveillance tapes show your association with Elaine started well before se asked me for a divorce I would be within my rights to file an alienation of affections suit against you. I will forego that pleasure if all of my conditions are met.

"And — this is a pretty big one — I will not get a copy of the report to your wife. As an experienced divorce attorney I'm sure that you know what is likely to happen if she doesn't like what she reads."

I stood up.

"You can keep that. It is just one of many copies. No need to rush your decision. Take some time and think it over. Call me by three tomorrow and let me know how you want to play it. If you decide to take me up on my offer I'll leave it to you to explain to Elaine why I won't be sending her any more money."

"I don't need to wait until tomorrow. I don't have any choice and you know it. But I can't just stop court ordered alimony."

"Sure you can. All Elaine has to do is say that she has remarried. It should be no problem for her to tell that lie. After all, she spent the last part of her marriage lying to me and it didn't seem to bother her."