Chapter 2

I left work at five o'clock with four hours to kill before I met Shona. I was on my way to get a meal when my phone rang, it was Stu from the Scotsman. "I've got your mate Mitch's wife here, she's had far too much to drink and is threatening to drive home. Can you come by and talk some sense into her?"

Mitch was my best mate, we had known one another since we served our apprenticeship together thirty years ago. I was also godfather to their two children. He worked offshore, and was due back from his two week trip on Saturday. Poor bastard, I knew they weren't getting on, I hope she didn't plan on cheating on him. After all, the Scotsman was a well known pick-up bar.

I walked in to find Karen sitting at the bar, she looked a real tramp but at least she was alone. She was very drunk, she could still talk but I guessed walking was going to be an exercise in leg plaiting. I told her I was taking her home and she said. "Oh goodee, BP comes to my rescue." The way she said it implied that she was 'making herself available'. She wasn't going to get anything more than a lift home but I didn't intend having that argument in the bar. I lifted her off the stool and helped her from the bar. She had her arm round me and tried to kiss me but I pointed her up the pavement and walked her in the direction of my car. We must have made an odd looking couple, but I got her to the car in five minutes.

I rang their house, hoping to god that Laura or Matt, their two kids, would be in. They were no longer kids, Matt was seventeen and Laura was nineteen. I didn't fancy dealing with this situation on my own. Fortunately Matt was in and said he would wait for us. It took about twenty minutes to reach their house but once Karen realised where she was headed she started to kick off. "I thought we were going to your place for a shag," she said, very drunkenly. "I want a shag, I don't want to go home, please, you can even fuck me up the arse."

I just ignored it and was relieved to see Matt waiting outside their house for us. We got her out of the car and Laura came out, she had got home a few minutes earlier. "Mother, you are disgusting," she said. "Get inside, if I tell Dad he'll go ballistic." I knew Stu would have her keys so I asked Matt if he would fetch her car back. He had recently passed his driving test and agreed so we set off back to the Scotsman. While we were driving Matt started to talk about his Mum and I realised that Mitch would be treading the same path as me unless he tackled Karen about her behaviour. As he talked I began to think it might already be too late.

Matt told me that things had been bad for six months. Whenever Mitch was away for his two week tour offshore Karen would go out drinking. He thought she was cheating as well.

We got back to the Scotsman and I asked him how old he was, he said he was seventeen. I repeated the question just as we reached the door. Matt finally got the drift and said, "OK, eighteen for the time being." Baz was on and didn't say a word. I got a couple of drinks, two cokes as we were both driving, while Matt found a table. I then noticed that the next table was occupied by Shona's sister and four of her mates. She recognised me, and waved but didn't join us or speak. I was glad as I knew Matt wanted to talk.

We talked for about an hour and in the end Matt coaxed me into going around on Saturday evening to keep the peace while Matt and Laura spoke to Mitch, his dad, about Karen's behaviour. Why do I get all the good jobs! They were worried Mitch would kick off, and to be honest he had every reason to after what she said to me. I noticed Shona's sister had been listening in whenever she could but I didn't see what harm her knowing would do.

I left the Scotsman around eight-thirty and rang Shona to see how she was doing, she should be on her way home. She rejected my call. A few minutes later I got a text, 'Fuck off, you are dumped'. What was going on? I tried to ring several more times on my way to her house but her phone was off. I tried a couple more texts, asking why, but I got no answer. I couldn't understand it, I had done nothing, I wasn't even late in spite of getting Mitch's wife home and talking to Matt.

I got to her house just before nine. Her car wasn't there, and her elderly neighbour volunteered, "You've just missed her, she left five minutes ago." I decided to leave a note, and just put, 'Why? Love Paul." I hung around for nearly an hour but she was obviously not coming home anytime soon. I was now in a black mood, Shona had dumped me just as I was getting to like her, and my best mate's marriage looked to be going the same way as mine.

I was sorry I let Matt talk me into going round on Saturday but I couldn't let him down. I had always been there for the kids. I took the godfather duties seriously even though I wasn't religious. Laura actually came to me when she was about to start having sex with her boyfriend at sixteen as her mum and dad wouldn't talk to her about it. I told her to be true to herself, not to be pressured, and to make sure she took precautions if it was what SHE wanted, as you cant rely on men. Then I went with her to the family planning clinic even although I found it highly embarrassing. So, even though it wasn't going to be pleasant, I wasn't going to shirk my responsibilities.

I got home just before ten and decided to try ringing Shona at home. Then I realised I didn't have her landline number, I always called her mobile. I looked in the phone book, but no luck, like many people these days she was obviously ex-directory.

To say I was pissed off was an understatement; first the shit with Karen and now this. They say things always come in threes and sure enough I hadn't been in five minutes when my ex rang. She was moaning about her settlement. I was at the end of my tether. "Fuck off," I snarled, "you aren't getting any more money. If you don't like it fight it through your solicitor but his bill comes off your share." I didn't even give her time to answer before slamming the phone down.

I went to bed pissed off and upset with Shona for dumping me without warning. I thought we had been getting on well. Fucking women! Oh well, back to the pick up bars for me. I had a disturbed night. I woke several times with nightmares, mostly relating to an accident I had witnessed some years before where two men had been crushed and killed by a falling pressure vessel.

I went to Jocks for my breakfast the next morning, Shona wasn't there and Jock asked why.

"I don't know, she dumped me!" I think my whole attitude told him that the subject was off limits.

I decided to try the pick-up bars on Friday night. There were a couple of likely looking girls in the Scotsman but my heart wasn't in it. I had one drink and left. As I was walking out Shona's sister walked in. She stopped me and asked how I was getting on with Shona and I told her I had been dumped, as of yesterday.

We ended up sitting down and chatting for maybe half an hour. She asked what had happened and I told her. She suggested that Shona was pissed off because I was late after talking to Matt.

"I wasn't late. We weren't supposed to meet until nine. Could you find out why she dumped me."

"We fell out over the mess I left. We haven't spoken since so I don't think she'll tell me. I tried to ring last night but she rejected my call."

We exchanged phone numbers and I asked her to ring me if she heard anything. I knew she was prepared to step into Shona's shoes and if she was as good a fuck as her sister I certainly wouldn't kick her out of bed. But then I thought about the complications, she had two kids and she was a tramp really, not like her sister. As I got to my car I actually regretted giving her my number.

I went to Mitch and Karen's on Saturday and it was worse than I expected. I had to restrain him to stop him from beating the shit out of Karen. Then the complications set in. Laura and Matt blamed their mum and wanted her to move out but she wouldn't. It ended up with Mitch coming back to mine and camping out in the spare room. Karen was distraught, but it was a bit late for regrets. What a fucking mess! Still, it kept my mind off Shona.

Mitch stayed in bed most of the day on Sunday, he was a broken man. I felt bad about what had happened but then I thought, what else could I do. The kids were livid with their mother and were going to tell their dad what was going on. I didn't want to leave him on his own so I spent the day running power to one of the outbuildings. It was hard work, digging the eighteen inch deep trench across the drive. Mitch surfaced about two o'clock and helped for a couple of hours.

We both tucked into a bottle of whisky on Sunday night. I told him about Shona and the sudden dumping and her sister Janet. He told me he knew about Karen, someone else had told him but he had been in denial. Matt's determination to bring things to a head had worked. We both went to bed drunk, calling women evil, and vowed never to have another relationship, but to use women and drop them. He wanted me to set him up with Janet, 'for a shag'. I knew she would probably be up for it but I didn't want the complications and refused point blank. I think he thought it was because I was going to get with her.

I awoke on Monday morning with a king size hangover. There was no way I could go into work so I rang in sick. I wouldn't get paid but I didn't really need the money. Mitch got up earlier than on Sunday and was also hung over. After a bit of lunch he cheered up a bit and decided to go into Aberdeen to find somewhere to rent; he hated the countryside for more than a day or two. I stayed behind.

He rang somewhere around three to say he had found a two bed house; it was just round the corner from Shona's place and he asked, "Shall I go round and try and find out what's going on? I owe you mate, otherwise I would have been waking up in jail every day." I told him not to bother, the whole thing wasn't worth the trouble. I just needed to get over it.

I went to work the next day, still no sign of Shona at Jocks, I half thought about going round to her office but decided a scene at her workplace wouldn't help either of us.

Mitch got the keys to his new place and I helped him move some stuff over after work, my big Nissan truck meant we did it in two trips. Karen was crying the whole time but Mitch wouldn't even acknowledge her. Laura had moved in with her boyfriend; I think it was a result of her mum's behaviour but he was a decent enough bloke so it was probably for the best. Matt wanted to move in with his dad but Mitch said he needed time to settle in. Matt said OK but I know he was upset. Karen tried to talk to me but I didn't want to know, I was really down after the shit of the last few days.

Wednesday morning I woke with a bad migraine again. The stress was taking its toll, I needed to do something. I had to ring in sick again. This was the second day in a week. I hadn't taken more than three days off in the last ten years. My boss rang me in the middle of the afternoon and said, "Look, you need to take a break, why not take the rest of the week off. We've worked together over the years on different projects and I've never seen you looking so stressed, I'll even pay you for the three days, it'll be cheaper than you breaking down completely."

I said it wasn't about the money and I was fine, we argued for a few minutes and then he stopped and said very firmly, "You are working at home for the rest of the week and next week as well. You'll be paid and your job is to go and do something to relax you. I don't care what, go walking, go to Amsterdam and shag every window girl, just do something to unwind. This is an order and if you don't carry it out you'll be in breach of contract. I want you back here, bright eyed and bushy tailed ready to finish this job on the fifteenth. You have one week and then it's the Xmas break. I need you on site at Peterhead to start on the build phase at the beginning of February." That was me told.

His business partner rang about an hour later and basically reiterated what had been said. He told me to do as I was told, he even said they would pay for any travel expenses if they could fiddle them, if they were somewhere we went regularly, implying a trip to Holland.

This was a wake up call. I was at the end of my tether, too much stress, and I was run down. I rang George, my boss, at home later that evening and thanked him for what he had done. I said I would have the rest of the week at home and sort the outbuildings out, and would try to get away the following week. He was happy and said that he would come and see me on Friday. "To make sure you're doing as you're told. And I expect to see some travel plans for the following week."

I decided to put off making any plans but an e-mail from Greg, his business partner, confirmed that they were serious. "We need you fit and well, not a burned out wreck."

Thursday I woke feeling much better and decided to get up and go into work. However just as I was getting to the car my phone rang, it was Greg. "I know you're thinking of coming in this morning, probably just getting in the car now, don't. I've had your swipe card removed from the security system so you won't be able to get in until I arrive, and I'm going to be late. So go and do as you are told, George'll see you at home tomorrow, and I'll see you on the fifteenth."

So I went back in and made myself a bacon butty, not as nice as Jocks breakfast but it filled a hole. I then decided to get stuck into fixing the two outbuildings. It wasn't really the time of year but the enforced holiday meant it was a good project to get on with. Plus, I wanted my workshop up and running.

I got the power laid into the first building by mid morning. When I went in there was a missed call on my phone from Shona. I tried to ring back but her phone was off. I sent a text, I half thought about just returning her dumping text, but in the end I kept it simple, 'You rang what do you want?'.

Next job was the roof of the outbuilding. I had bought a load of corrugated iron sheets at a farm sale in the autumn. I got the ladders set up and set about making the roof water tight. Thank god the timbers seemed OK. I had been on the roof about half an hour when I heard a car on the track leading to the house. It was Shona.

She parked on the hard standing and I saw her exit from the back. She called out to me as I made my way down the ladders. "Paul, I've made a mistake." I walked over to her and stood in front of her.

The bright cheery way she said it just made me angry and I exploded, shouting, "You have the bare arsed cheek to come round here, a week after dumping me, without any explanation, and say 'I've made a mistake', like you have just realised you have forgotten to take the rubbish out. You must be taking the piss out of me, the old man lusting after a young woman." I turned away and walked back to the ladders before I said any more.

Shona tried to follow but her wheelchair wouldn't negotiate the bank at the edge of the hard standing. She turned around and got back into her car. By the time I got back on to the roof I could see her car going slowly up the track to the main road.

I got back to the task of ripping off the rusted sheets and nailing the new ones down. I was angry, angry with her cheek, and I took it out on the roof with the hammer, banging the long nails in with one hard strike, and of course this led to me hammering my thumb. It hurt like hell and blood was oozing out round the nail so I got off the roof to go and find the first aid box and bandage it.

As I was stood at the sink, running it under the cold tap to clean it, I saw Shona's silver MPV making it's way back up the track. What was it with her? She came out of the back and saw me at the kitchen window. She managed to get herself under the window, I could see she had been crying and she called out, "Paul, please come out." I finished bandaging my thumb and she was still there. She called out again "Come on, I just want a couple of hours of your time to show you something then I'll leave you alone." What was it with women?

I reluctantly went to the front door. I was dressed in my overalls and site boots and was filthy. Shona zoomed up to me and stopped at the bottom of the step. She said again, "Please come with me now. I just want to show you something, then I'll let you get on with your life."

She was almost in tears. She looked at me as I stood there, thinking. Is she pregnant? What's going on? She persisted, "I'll take you into town, show you something, and then bring you back here. Unless you would like me to take you to A&E to get that thumb looked at?" I noticed there was a small red patch soaking through the bandage already and it was throbbing.

"If I come with you, what do I get out of it?" I wasn't thinking sexually but she took it that way.

"You can fuck me as soon as we get back here, or I'll give you a blow job. I don't care, I just need you to see something."

Well, there was no faulting her persistence and I thought, what the hell!

"OK, but don't expect to put the clock back," I said harshly. "You dumped me remember."

At this comment the flood gates opened and she started sobbing. I got into the passenger seat of her car and she set off towards Aberdeen once she had pulled herself together. The atmosphere during the journey was tense. We were both trying hard to act normally but the conversation was very stilted. She did ask why I was at home and I just said I was taking a few days off to get the outbuildings usable.

We got into the city centre and she parked in her usual spot where she worked. "Follow me," she said when she got out. We went in a back door, she opened it with a swipe card, and up a ramp into a corridor with a lift at the end. She called the lift and we went up to the sixth floor. We then walked along another corridor and stopped at a door, 'Shona McAdam — IT Manager', her office. Again, she swiped the door and let me in, I hadn't seen anyone else in the building.