A Grave Matter

by Dag123

Tags: Ma/Ma, Humor,

Desc: Humor Story: Halloween time! Ghosts! Pumpkins! Weird Creatures of the night! Grave Robbing? The Town Drunk? Huhhh...? Happy Halloween, Everyone!

Robbing for Research goes awry.

"If these future surgeons are ever going to learn how to do surgery on people, we've got to get them more bodies to cut on."

"Well, Doc, - there's no more Indigents in the morgue, so we can't steal 'em from there."

"I don't understand - this is the year 1930 - there's a Depression on. You'd think more people would be dying." the Doctor, complained bitterly.

"What would you have us do, Doc — go out to North Union Cemetery and dig up the people who have died and been buried there recently?"

"Sure... Why not. How about your no-good cousins, Jeb and Wilbur, they're a couple of down-and-outers - always looking to make a buck. We could pay them - Oh, maybe $5.00 dollars a body."

"You know... , if we even considered that, Doc, it would have to be done in the dead of night - and I know my cousins. Jeb and Wilbur are both deathly afraid of graveyards, and worst than that, they're convinced ghosts walk around in the graveyard at night. They don't like to go by that graveyard even in the daylight."

"Yeah, but didn't you say they own one of those big old black Buggies with the little wagon bed behind. Be perfect for hauling dead bodies in."

Jeb and Wilbur find gainful employment

"Hey, Jim... what brings you out this way," Wilbur asked, as his cousin climbed out of his Model A Ford.

"The Doctor I work for has some work for you and Jeb if you're interested."

When Jeb and Wilbur heard what that work was they were both scared stiff - but they needed money for food and whiskey - so they finally with great reluctance accepted the job.

Midnight in the Graveyard.

Trying to drive slowly holding the horse reins loosely they fearfully approached the graveyard gate. Jeb hopped down from the buggy and quietly swung the creaky gate open.

A moment later, they were inside the pitch-black cemetery. Tying their horse to the fence, they quickly made their way through the sinister black night to the freshly dug grave of one Tyrell Babcock. When alive he had been one of the meanest men in the county. Both Jeb and Wilbur had made it a point to stay out of Babcock's way.

"Yeah, let's dig up ol' Tyrell tonight for our first one," Jeb laughed, adding,

"Maybe I'll take him out of that fancy coffin of his and kick him in the ass a couple times."

Wilbur looking around, scared stiff - wanted none of that.

"Darn it, Jeb," Let's just dig the bastard up. He's going to get his - Boy, I'd really like to be there when they cut him up. "

"Okay," Jeb agreed, "Let's just dig him up and get out of here - this place gives me the willies," he said, his teeth chattering from the superstitious fear he felt at being in a place that he was sure was haunted.

Someone's watching

Using their spades and shovels, they quickly dug up the late Mr. Babcock's coffin and hoisted it out of the hole. Feeling a little less frightened, Wilbur leaned against a nearby tombstone.

"Hey, Jeb lets take a little walk and grab a smoke before we take off."

"That sounds like a good idea," Jeb agreed, glad to step out of the graveyard even for a moment.

While Jeb and Wilbur were making their way outside the graveyard to catch a smoke, a solitary figure had been watching them.

Lester Higgins the town drunk was finally sober and needed a ride back to town. So, he quickly broke the lock on the coffin, and threw the late Mr. Babcock back down into his dark hole from which they had just lifted him.

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Story tagged with:
Ma/Ma / Humor /